Aloha Nui Loa
by Bugsbunnyaloha
Summary: A sequel to 'The Little Russian that Could.' five years later. Family, love and trust keeps them together, but those three qualities that they rely on could also be their downfall. When a mistaken identity threatens their youngest son, Steve and Kari fight each other and the enemy to pull themselves out of the abyss that is tearing their family apart.
1. Chapter 1

"Kari!" Steve yelled from upstairs.

"What?" She replied over her shoulder as she flipped the bacon in the pan. She glanced over at her five-year-old son JD, pouting at the kitchen table.

"The baby needs to be changed," Steve yelled down.

She looked in the direction of the stairs, "Then change her."

"I've got to get going," he argued, "it's a bad one."

"You found it, you change it," she argued back. She looked back over at JD who was the spitting image of his father, except for the dusty blond hair. "John Daniel McGarrett you eat that oatmeal right now!"

He kicked his legs under the table, whining, "I don't like oatmeal."

"Yes you do. You said yesterday you loved it and wanted it for breakfast every day. Now eat it!"

He refused to pick his spoon up and crossed his arms stubbornly.

"Kari!" Steve shouted.

"Oh my God." She walked to the bottom of the steps, "I'm cooking your breakfast and trying to get your son ready, I think you can spare the time to change your daughter."

He appeared at the top of the stairs holding his seven-month-old daughter Casey. "She's going to need a bath."

Casey bounced up and down excitedly on his arm, seeing her mother for the first time that morning, her blond hair sticking up in different directions and her beautiful smile showing the small nubs of two front teeth. Steve rubbed her back, calming her down. She grabbed a hold of his shirt like it was a blanket, stuck her thumb in her mouth and laid her head against his shoulder. "Great!" he whined, "Her diaper just leaked on my shirt."

Kari smiled, "Well now you can change yourself at the same time." She hurried back to the stove, pointing at JD as she passed him. "You're father is going to be ready to take you to school in about five minutes, so you better eat that oatmeal, right now!"

"I DON'T WANT IT!" he screamed and kicked his legs so hard the table moved. He suddenly froze when he heard footsteps coming down the stairs. His eyes got big as he waited for the approaching storm. He knew he had gone too far.

Steve appeared around the corner of the stairs, still holding Casey. He looked directly at his son, "I'm going to say to you the same thing I would say to any other man." He pointed at him, "If you ever speak to my wife like that again, you're going to have to deal with me!"

JD's bottom lip began to quiver. He looked over at his mother who stood at the stove, trying to look stern. He looked back over at his father and blinked several times, "I'm sorry, Dad," his voice shook.

Steve motioned to Kari, "Don't apologize to me."

He looked back over at Kari, "I'm sorry, Mommy."

Kari covered her mouth, trying to hide her smile; he looked so darn cute and innocent right then she wanted to hug him. "Ok, eat." She walked up to Steve and took Casey from him. "There's a clean shirt hanging in the laundry room."

"Thank you." He kissed her and pulled on Casey's fingers that clung to his shirt. He held her tiny hand and kissed it, pretending like he was going to eat her fingers as she squealed with laughter. He walked by JD who was shoveling in his second bite of oatmeal and put his hand on his small shoulder, tickling it. He squirmed in his chair; laughing so hard the oatmeal fell off the spoon and onto the table. He ignored it and scooped up another spoonful.

"Can I drive to school Dad?"

Steve chuckled pulling the clean shirt off the hanger in the laundry room. "Sure Buddy. I'll take a nap in the backseat and you can drive." He pulled his stained shirt off, dropping it in a basket on the floor and slid the clean one on.

"Uncle Danny let me." He took a drink of milk, spilling some on his shirt, glancing at the mess for just a split second and then it was forgotten. "He let me."

Steve scooped up some eggs and bacon on a plate walking over to him, taking the seat across from him, "When did Danny let you drive?"

JD shrugged.

"Where were you?"

"In his car," JD answered truthfully.

"I know, but where were you in his car when you drove it?"

"Sitting on his lap."

Steve shook his head, knowing he wasn't making himself clear enough, "Were you in the driveway? Were you driving down the road? Where were you?"

"At the football game."

"Oh, so he let you drive in the parking lot of the football game that you went to the other day?"

JD nodded, "I steered and he did the foot part. I wanted to go fast but he wouldn't, but he made the engine go VRRRRMMM." He held his spoon up as his voice became deep, imitating the sound of a roaring engine.

Steve chuckled, "Don't tell Mommy."

JD looked up at him, shaking his head, "That's what Danny said." He pushed himself up so he was kneeling on the chair and leaned in to Steve, whispering, "He said that Mommy would give him a hard spanking if she knew, but he didn't care what you thought."

Steve tilted his head at his son's revelation, "Really? He said that?"

JD nodded, stirring the spoon around in the oatmeal, pretending it was a car, making engine noises. "He said that Gracie used to do stuff with you and now he gets to do stuff with me."

Steve laughed, "Yeah I suppose this is pay back time."

JD ignored the comment, racing the spoon around. Steve reached over and stopped him, "Eat, don't play with it. We have to go in a minute."

"Can I go to work with you today?"

"No, sorry buddy, not today."

"How come?" he whined, "I can get you coffee and I'll clean the puter like last time."

"Computer," he corrected him, "you have to go to school."

"I hate school." He huffed.

"It's a part of life, JD. Sometimes I don't like going to work and your Mom doesn't like cleaning the house, but we all have to do stuff sometimes that we don't like."

"Why?"

"Because if I didn't go to work, then we wouldn't have money to buy things and if Mommy didn't clean the house then it would be a big mess," he reached under the table, grabbing his knee, tickling it, "and if you don't go to school you'll only be as smart as Uncle Danny, not as smart as me."

He squirmed in the chair, "Are you smarter than Uncle Danny?"

"Yes. You can tell him I said that too."

He didn't understand the joke and took another bite of oatmeal.

"Why don't you like school, JD?"

"Bobby Caldwell is mean to me and Parker." He talked with his mouth full, "One day I'm going to punch him."

"Hey," Steve scolded, "hitting him won't solve it." He narrowed his eyes, "Has he ever hit you?"

JD shook his head, "No, but he's mean to Parker and Parker's my friend. He makes fun of him."

"Does he hit Parker?" He pictured JD's friend who was smaller than a typical five-year old.

"He pushed him down one time when we were playing ball, so I pushed him back. He didn't push me back though."

Steve smiled proudly, "Well, I'm glad you stick up for Parker, but you shouldn't have pushed him back. You should have told him to stop and maybe stood in front of him, sometimes that works better."

"What if he pushes me?"

"If he didn't push you that time, then he probably never will, but if he does," he looked toward the stairs to see if Kari was there, "then you have my permission to push him back, but don't you ever be the one to push first. That makes you the bully."

JD stared at him, trying to input that piece of information that his father just gave him. "Ok Dad," he replied, looking at him like what he said was the most important thing he'd ever heard.

"Get your backpack, buddy. We have to get going."

JD squirmed out of the chair and ran into the living room.

Steve ran up the steps and into the bathroom. Kari was kneeling on the floor washing Casey off as she sat in the bathtub, slapping her hands in the water.

"We're leaving." He leaned over cupping the back of her neck, kissing her, "I love you."

"I love you too." She smiled as he leaned over the tub and kissed Casey on the head.

"Bye stinky girl. I love you too."

"Give JD a kiss for me."

"I will. I'll call you later," he said as he walked out.

* * *

Steve looked up from his desk as Danny came in through the front doors. He whistled to get his attention and motioned with his arm for him to come inside.

"Hey, what's up?" Danny came inside and sat on the leather couch across from Steve's desk.

"So JD asked me if he could drive to work today. You know anything about that?"

Danny laid his head back roaring with laughter. "Yes, of course! I let him drive when we went to the U of H game the other day."

"Describe, 'let him drive' to me."

"I gave him a couple of beers at the game and then propped him up on a phone book in the driver's seat and gave him the keys." Danny rolled his eyes, "What do you think? He sat on my lap and steered the car."

Steve shook his head, "Uncle Danny, Uncle Danny, I'm going to have to start tailing ya when you take my son."

"It's not any different from you taking my sixteen year old daughter up four wheeling on that dangerous road!" he defended.

"It wasn't a dangerous road, and she needed to learn that. She lives on an island where kids drive those roads all the time just for fun. Do you want her going up there with someone and then not being able to get back because she can't maneuver the road?" Steve made a face, "Besides, I would never take Gracie someplace that wasn't safe."

"And I would never let JD do something dangerous."

"My point being," Steve corrected him, "is that every time we get in the car now, he's going to be bugging me to let him drive like Uncle Danny does."

"Really, kind of like when Gracie used to bug me about going surfing with her just like she did with Uncle Steve?" He huffed, "I don't have one bit of sympathy for you buddy." He smiled, "Just wait until Casey gets a little older, I've got all sorts of plans for her."

Steve glared at him, "Well you better hope that Kari doesn't find out."

"You didn't tell her did you?"

"No, but I might," he teased.

"No you won't," Danny said confidently.

"Why not?"

"Because for reasons unbeknownst to the two of us, she would be just as mad at you as she would be at me."

Steve went to deny it but then shut his mouth, chuckling, "Damn, you're right."

Danny pointed at him, "This is between you and me." He walked out of Steve's office.

He yelled after him, "I think it's time Gracie learned how to fly a helicopter."

* * *

Kari woke up to the sound of the shower coming on. She sat up in bed, glancing over at the nightstand clock that read eleven forty-eight. '_Late night for him_,' she thought. She lay back down, contemplating whether or not she should tell him tonight.

She still couldn't believe it herself, not sure what they had been thinking while on an anniversary trip to Lanai six weeks earlier. She rolled her eyes still amazed that of all the things she could have forgotten, her pills were the biggest blunder. She had left them sitting on the bed by the suitcase. They had bought a six-pack of condoms that lasted for the first two days, but after a lengthy dinner and then drinks on the last night, they went back to the room both in a slight drunken state and decided the chances of her getting pregnant were slim to nothing. She couldn't help but smile at the memory of it. It was one of the best sexually charged and romantic nights they had ever spent together. '_At least I have that to reflect on over the next nine months_,' she laughed, and then groaned over the thought of going through another pregnancy so soon. She had just got back into shape from having Casey.

She looked at the bathroom door as Steve came out, shutting the light off first so he wouldn't wake her. '_It's the little things_,' she smiled to herself. She watched him drop the towel in the basket by the door and slip on a pair of boxer briefs, enjoying the show. He carefully slipped into bed next to her.

She rolled over and put her arm across his chest, laying her head on his shoulder.

"Hey," he said surprised, putting his arms around her, "Did I wake you up."

"No, I was watching you."

He kissed her forehead, "Peeping Tom." He rolled her over so she was lying on her back, "that's against the law you know."

"Be gentle with me," she tilted her head, wrapping her arms around his neck.

He kissed her on the neck, "Gentle like our first time, or gentle like our last night on Lanai," he growled, knowing that night was anything but gentle.

Kari laughed louder than she should have. His timing was impeccable.

Steve leaned back, putting his hand over her mouth as she continued to giggle, "You're going to wake up Casey," he whispered.

Kari pulled his hand down, smiling, "It's just that," she chuckled, "I was thinking about that night a few minutes ago."

Steve grinned, "So I made quite the impression that night, huh?"

"Oh you made an impression all right," Kari giggled, her eyes big.

He leaned back further, getting a better view of her, "What do you mean?"

She slid her hands from around his neck, resting them on his chest, "What was it about that night that was different from the other nights we spent on Lanai?"

Steve shrugged, shaking his head, "Besides even better sex, I don't know."

"What were we lacking and decided to forgo in our drunken state?"

He squinted his eyes like he was trying to decipher her clues, "I don't know," he began and then it hit him, "Oh yea, condoms." He chuckled at the memory of their discussion that night as she stared at him; confident he would put two and two together in the next couple of seconds.

Sure enough his smile slowly faded as he focused back on her. He pushed all the way back so his arms were extended, one on each side of her body, as the look on his face became a cross between shock and wonder. "Are you pregnant?"

"Congratulations, third times a charm." She sighed, stroking his arms.

"Wow!" he hung his head, letting out a deep sigh, "Wow!"

She wasn't sure how to read him and just let him digest the news.

"Are you sure?"

She nodded, "I took a home test today."

"Wow!" he sighed again and then eased back down on her. His right hand moved down her body, resting on her lower belly, "It's sooner than we planned, but hell nothing we do is ever really scheduled right." He smiled, kissing her, "I'll help out more, I promise."

"You already do help out a lot."

He shook his head; "I should have taken care of Casey this morning, stuff like that. I'll do more."

She touched his face, "You do enough." She glanced over at the clock, reminding him of the long hours he put in that day, "you work hard enough." She shrugged the situation off as if it was no big deal, "We'll be fine as long as we stick together and work as a team."

"And we do that well." He kissed her, "I love you." He didn't wait for her reply and slid down her body, between her legs, lifting her shirt and stopping at her stomach, gently caressing her just below the belly button. "Hi baby, welcome to your new home." He kissed her stomach as Kari smiled down at him, running her hand over his hair. He looked up at her, giving her one of his best seductive and sexy smiles, "Since I'm already down here." His kisses went lower as his hands moved up the inside of her thighs.

Kari moaned, throwing her head back into her pillow, "Oh Steve," she gripped a handful of sheets, making a fist, "Oh God, I love you too," she giggled.


	2. Chapter 2

Kari sat on the edge of the bed with her head hung down, taking in deep breaths, fighting off the nausea.

Steve came in and sat down next to her, "I talked to Maggie and she can take Casey." He gently rubbed her back, "You ok?"

"Hmm," she moaned, nudging his hand off her, "Honey please don't do that."

"Sorry," he sat still, not sure what she wanted him to do, so nothing was his best assumption. "Do you want me to stay home today?"

She patted his leg appreciatively, "No, it'll pass."

"How about if I take JD to work with me? Give you some peace and quiet."

She laid her head on his shoulder, "That would be nice. Will he be in the way?"

"He'll be ok."

"What if you get a call?"

He put his arm around her, "I can name ten people off the top of my head in that station that would watch him if the team had to leave. They love having him around."

"I think I'm just going to lie down for a while." She moved back on the bed.

Steve stood up and laid the blanket over her, kissing her forehead. "If you need me today call me." He purposely made eye contact with her, "Ok?"

She forced a smile for him, "Ok."

He closed the door on his way out, going down the steps. JD sat on the floor trying unsuccessfully to tie his shoe.

Steve came up behind him, scooping him up and flinging him over his shoulder backwards so his belly was face up.

JD laughed and flailed his legs in the air, throwing one shoe off as it flew across the family room.

He flipped him back over so he was holding him in both of his arms. "I have a surprise for you."

His little body convulsed from laughing, "What?" he asked in a high pitch squeal.

Steve lifted him with both arms so his stomach was level with his mouth and blew on his bare belly.

Kari could hear JD's sweet laughter from upstairs. She was on the verge of throwing up, but still couldn't help but smile at the sound of her two perfect boys playing together.

Steve dropped him on the couch and sat down next to him, "Hey, do you want to go to work with me today?"

JD sat up quickly, his eyes huge, "Yes!" He squirmed off the couch, running for the stairs.

"Where are you going?"

"To tell Mom."

"Mom already knows. She's not feeling very good today so Casey is going to Maggie's and you are coming with me."

He stood on the bottom step, his mind racing with what he should bring. He couldn't really think of anything since there was so much to do and play with there. "Can we go right now?"

"After Maggie gets here." He smiled at his son's enthusiasm, it made him feel good that he liked coming with him.

They both heard a knock on the back door. Steve looked at him excitedly, pointing with his thumb toward the kitchen, "Maggie's here!"

JD tore through the room with one foot still missing a shoe and opened the door for her, "Hi Maggie. I'm going to work with Dad today!"

Maggie put her hands together like it was the most exciting news she had ever heard, "Oh my goodness, aren't you the lucky boy! You must be so excited!"

He nodded and slammed the door closed as she came inside.

"JD!" Steve scolded, motioning for him to be quiet, "Don't slam the door, Mom's trying to sleep." He walked up putting his hand on his head, turning him toward the family room, "Go find your other shoe." He shook his head at Maggie, "He's like a freight train."

"He's excited." Maggie reminded him, walking past him toward the stairs, "Is Casey in her crib?"

"Yep. Her diaper bag is over here by the door. Thanks Maggie, we appreciate this."

She waved her hand, slapping the air, "The best part of my day is when you call for a babysitter." She paused before going upstairs, "How is she feeling?"

"About the same."

"She was like this with JD and Casey too. It's always late in her second trimester that she gets the morning sickness."

"She never follows the rules," Steve huffed.

"Lucky for you she doesn't that would make her boring."

He couldn't help but agree with her.

* * *

"Dad?"

"What?" he looked at JD in the rearview mirror of the truck.

"How come," he paused, "how come Mom calls me Jonathon Daniel McGarrett when she's mad?"

He smiled at the confusion on his face, "Because that's your whole name, and moms do that when they're mad. I think all moms do that. My Mom used to call me Steven John McGarrett when she was mad."

"You have a name John too?"

"Yep, just like you. That was my Dad's name."

"He's in the picture that Mommy made, the picture by the TV. He died and went to heaven."

Steve glanced in the mirror at him, "Yes, with my Mom too." He pulled into a parking spot at the station and turned around, seeing his mind working on the next question in his blue eyes that blinked like he maybe had the answer but wasn't so sure. Steve waited patiently for him to ask.

"If they were here, would they be my Mom and Dad too?"

"No JD, they would be your Grandma and Grandpa. It's like Maggie. You know when her kids, Stacy and Kevin come and visit and they bring their kids, Josh, Lorna and Pauly?" JD nodded his understanding. "Josh, Lorna and Pauly call Maggie, Grandma."

"You don't have a Mom and Dad," he declared, knowing all along that they died, but the impact of it was just now hitting him, "and Mom doesn't have a Mom and Dad."

"Nope, not anymore." He felt the painful impact of that himself. JD would never have the privilege of having a Grandma and Grandpa. Maggie would be as close as any of his kids would ever know. She was an excellent substitute, but nonetheless, it still stung a bit.

Steve got out and came around the other side of the truck, undoing JD's seatbelt.

"Who took care of you when they died?" he asked, a look of concern on his face.

"I was older. Aunt Mary and I could take care of ourselves." He reached across him, grabbing his backpack.

"Who would take care of me and Casey if you and Mommy died?"

That got his attention. He stopped what he was doing and looked at him, "Mom and I aren't going to die for a long, long, long time." He was blown away by his inquisitiveness. Sometimes he would floor him with the questions he asked, and the way he would ask them. He saw tears begin to fill his eyes, "JD! Come on buddy, don't cry," he halfheartedly laughed, "I promise, Mom and I will never leave you and Casey."

"Bobby said that people shoot policeman for fun." He looked down at Steve's gun, "You should always wear your gun Dad. Don't take off your gun."

He was beginning to understand why he didn't like this Bobby Caldwell kid. "I always wear it when I'm at work. You know that."

He put his hand on Steve's chest, "How come you don't wear," he couldn't remember the technical name, "the shirt that stops the bullets?"

He took his small hand and held it, not wanting to see the worry in his little boy's eyes, "I do JD. I wear a bulletproof vest when they call us out on a case. When I leave the police station I put it on. Remember, I told you it's like a shield; nothing can get through it, especially bullets. It keeps me really safe."

He seemed satisfied by his answer, scooting off the seat standing in the doorway of the truck, "Or you could catch the bullet with your hand." He made a fist in the air, imitating what it would look like, "I saw that on TV."

"TV isn't real Buddy." He put his arm around his thighs and lifted him up, closing the truck door with his other hand, "You shouldn't listen to what Bobby says either, people don't shoot policeman for fun. I think Bobby plays too many video games."

JD squirmed, trying to get down as they approached the front doors. "I don't want you to carry me inside like I'm a baby. I'm not a baby like Casey." His attitude changed from little boy to little man in the blink of an eye.

Steve bent over, setting him down, "Sorry big guy, I guess we should have stopped for a double shot of espresso coffee for ya too." He slid the backpack over JD's shoulders.

He looked up at him, making a yucky face, "Coffee is gross Dad!"

JD slipped past Steve as they walked through the Five O headquarters door, running down the wide corridor between the offices, his backpack barely hanging on his shoulders. He stopped at Chin's office first, "Hi Chin!" He went inside and around to his desk.

"Hey JD! What's happening big Kahuna?" he gave him a high-five. "Hey," Chin said, holding his fist out, "I got a new one. We bump fists and then they explode from the impact, like this." He touched JD's fist and then opened his hand making an exploding sound.

JD laughed, "Do it again."

They touched fists together and both made the sound at the same time.

"Good one!" Chin complimented him.

"Can I see your shot-gun?" he asked.

"It's in the car. I'll go get it." He scooted his chair back and they both came out of the office. "Be right back."

"Ok." he said, running up to Kono, "Hi Kono!"

"Hey Buddy," she knelt down and hugged him, "What are you doing here today?"

"Mommy's sick."

Kono glanced up at Steve with a look of concern, "What's wrong?"

"Morning sickness."

She made a painful face, not ever experiencing it but knowing it wasn't pleasant, "Poor thing." She smiled at JD, "Well at least we get you out of it. I've got some papers that need to be sorted later on. Help me out?"

JD smiled and nodded enthusiastically, "Yes!" He took her hand as she stood up, walking with her to Steve's office.

"Is Casey at home with her?"

"No, Maggie has her," Steve replied sitting behind his desk, opening his laptop, "Kari was sleeping when we left. I was going to go home at lunch and check on her."

Kono squeezed JD's hand looking down at him, "Do you want to go to lunch with me, Chin and Danny today?"

He looked at his Father for approval, "Can I Dad?"

"Sure. Thanks Kono."

"We can go to that taco place you like." She jumped up and down excitedly with him.

* * *

JD laid on Danny's couch in his office, playing a game on his cell phone. He slammed his foot on the couch when the game didn't go his way.

"Hey," Danny scolded him, "it's for fun. If you're going to pitch a fit when you lose, you can give it back right now."

JD tilted his head back, looking at him, "I won't do it again."

"How come there's no school today?"

He sat up, setting the phone in his lap, "Teacher's have a free day, or some'em like that."

"Cool for you, huh?"

JD smiled, "I forgot until I woke up today and my Mom said I didn't have to go."

"What do you think of the new baby?"

He shrugged.

"Do you want a brother or sister?"

JD thought about it for a second. His Mom and Dad had both asked him this question, but he told them he didn't care, but he did. He didn't want a brother because he was afraid he would take his Dad away from him. Casey was different. He didn't feel threatened by her because she was a girl. He couldn't explain how it was different, but it just was. He shrugged his answer again.

Danny sat back in his chair, watching the obvious discontent he was feeling about the new baby. For four years it had been just him, and then Casey came along and stole some of his parents attention, and now another one. He was a smart kid and could feel the shift even four months before the actual event. Danny felt for him. He was also the eldest of three. "Your Dad was telling me that he wanted to take you camping in the next couple of months."

JD scooted off the edge of the couch, leaning against it, "He did?"

"He was hoping that it would become something you and he could do every year."

"Just me and him, no one else?"

"For now yes, but later on maybe Casey and the new baby would come too."

His expression turned dismal as he flopped his body backwards on the couch, pouting.

Danny came around his desk and sat down next to him, "Yeah, I know how you feel."

"You do?"

"My Dad and I used to go do stuff all the time and then my brother and sister were born and they always had to come along."

He stood back up next to the couch, putting his hand on Danny's knee, "Did that make you mad?"

"At first it did, but then one time my Dad told me that even though he loved my brother and sister as much as me, that I was special because I was his first kid."

JD cracked a small smile, "I'm the first too."

"Yep, and not only are you important to your Mom and Dad but you are super important to your little sister and the new baby."

"I am?" he looked surprised and confused.

"Absolutely! Are you kidding me?" He pulled him up on his lap so he was straddling him and they were facing each other, "It's a HUGE responsibility being an older brother." He stretched his arms out, showing the magnitude of it.

He heard the word responsibility and thought chore; whenever that word was thrown around he was usually being scolded. "Do I have to pick up their toys?"

"No," Danny shook his head, and raised his eyebrow, "but if you play your cards right, they might pick up yours."

JD was intrigued, "If I win at cards, then they have to pick up my toys?"

He shook his head, "No, that's a figure of speech. What I mean is, being a big brother gives you authority over the younger kids in the family. Do you know what authority means?" He was pretty sure he didn't.

He squinted his face, trying to remember if he'd ever heard that word before, but shook his head no.

Danny gently poked him in the chest, "That makes you the boss of the younger kids."

JD's eyes got big as well as his smile, "I can make them do things?"

Danny nodded, and then held up his finger, "But, it also means that they will see you as someone they can go to for help, and you need to be ready and willing to help them when they need it. You'll kind of be like your Mom and Dad when they aren't around."

It was like a light went on over JD's head, "This one time, Casey was chewing on this toy that I used to play with, but now it's for babies, and the nose came off in her mouth. I had to go inside her mouth and take it out."

Danny held his hands out, palms up, "Exactly what I'm talking about. That was probably your first time acting as a real big brother. She could have choked on it."

"Then she should pick up my toys when she gets bigger," JD announced.

He winked at him, "You'll probably be able to make them do anything you want, a good big brother is something special to have," he pointed at JD's chest again, "and you JD are going to be one of those."

For the first time he was actually kind of excited for the new baby, not really caring now if it was a boy or a girl. "My Mom said that you were the one that named me JD."

Danny smiled, remembering the argument between he and Steve about it, "That's right, I was. Your Mom and Dad decided to make your middle name after me."

JD tilted his head, "But my middle name is Daniel and your name is Danny."

"It's the same name, like John is short for Jonathon, Danny is short for Daniel. Anyway, I was pretty happy about it, but then thought, who uses the middle name? I'd never get to hear my name being used. So I started calling you JD, the J for John and the D for Daniel. Pretty soon everyone started calling you that and now, fifteen years later we are still calling you that."

JD chuckled. "I'm only five."

"What?!" Danny yelped, grabbing him by the shoulders and tipping him backwards so his head almost touched the floor, "I thought you were fifteen! Don't lie to me?"

JD burst out laughing, that uncontrollable five-year old laugh that made everyone in the office, sit up at their desks and look, laughing themselves because it was impossible not to. "I'm not lying," he yelled, "I'm only five!"

Danny stood up holding on to his ankles so he was hanging upside down and walked with him that way over to Chin's office. "Do you claim this?"

Chin shook his head, "Never seen it before in my life."

"Help me Chin!" JD giggled.

He walked over to Kono's office, "Where should I put this?"

"You could hang it in the closet," she suggested.

"Kono!" he squealed.

He walked over to Steve's office and up to his desk, "He claims to know you." He lifted him up by his ankles until he was eye level with his father. Steve pretended to look at him curiously, "Hmm, kind of looks like my son JD."

"Dad!"

"Sounds like him too."

"I guess I'll leave him here then." Danny walked over to the couch and dropped him on his stomach.

"Can we go eat now?" JD asked, sitting up, dangling his feet over the edge.

* * *

Steve quietly closed the front door behind him not wanting to wake Kari if she were sleeping. He was surprised to see her standing at the kitchen table folding clothes.

"Hi," she smiled, "I wasn't expecting you." She looked past him, "Where's JD?"

"They took him to lunch so I could come home and check on you." He put a hand on her back, kissing her cheek, "Feeling better?"

"Yes, I feel much better."

"Good." He kissed her again and walked over to the fridge.

She stopped what she was doing and watched him, feeling that familiar tingle throughout her body from his kiss and just having him close. She knew it was in part because she was pregnant and sometimes the urge for him would just be overwhelming. She was beginning to feel that urge now.

"Is there anymore of that chicken you made last night?" He asked, not aware of the lingering stare coming from across the room as he bent over looking in the fridge.

She came up behind him, putting a hand on his back, gliding it up to his shoulder as he stood back up and then letting it slide down his bicep, always amazed as his strength and how firm he was. "Um," she sighed, "it's right here." She reached inside handing him the plastic container.

He made the mistake of looking right at her and smiling, "This was really good." He moved past her to the microwave.

She followed him like he was a magnet, helplessly attracting her. Her heart began to race, "Can you look at something in the laundry room for me?"

His expression became annoyed, "Is something wrong with the washer and dryer?"

"No," She led him by the hand to the only room in the house they had never had sex in but was on her list.

He thought it odd that she was holding his hand. "Is everything ok?"

She glanced over her shoulder at him, "Yes."

He followed her into the small room that consisted of the washer and dryer on one side, a shelf with a pile of clean towels on the other side and a space in the middle that was about four feet wide. "What do you want me to look at?"

Kari smiled sheepishly, biting her bottom lip. She unbuttoned the top three buttons on her sundress, exposing an ample amount of cleavage from her breasts that in Steve's opinion had not been affected one bit by having two kids.

His eyes moved from her chest to her face, "Thank you, I appreciate that fine-looking gesture before I fix whatever it is you need fixed."

She put her hands on his chest, moving them slowly up and around his neck, "Do you have any idea how incredibly sexy you are?"

Steve laughed; realizing then that nothing was actually broken.

"Sometimes I think about you all day, especially when I'm in here."

He glanced around the cramped room. "Here," he looked oddly at her, "you think about me here while you're doing laundry?"

She nodded, "Yes. When I do your laundry I can smell your cologne and if I'm lucky, your sweat on your shirts." She brushed her cheek against his; breathing in that same scent she had just spoken off before kissing his neck.

"You smell my shirts?" he was dumfounded by this revelation.

"Hmm," she moaned, "yes."

"He chuckled, putting an arm around her waist, "I hope you don't smell all my clothes."

She pulled back, glaring at him, "Don't ruin this for me Steven. You know how I get in my fifth month, I'm either sick or turned on," she smiled, "I'm not feeling sick right now."

"Where's Casey?"

"She fell asleep at Maggie's so she's keeping her for the afternoon." Her hands slid down his chest and under his shirt, "We are all alone. How often does that happen?"

He looked around the small room; "You want to have sex in here?"

She didn't respond but just nodded, undoing his belt.

He glanced at his watch as she tugged on his pants just a little too roughly when they wouldn't cooperate. "Whoa, hold on," he halfheartedly laughed, "why don't we go upstairs?"

"No," she replied adamantly, "it has to be here!" She kissed him on the mouth, mastering the belt and moving on to his zipper.

"Ok, ok!" he agreed, a little too afraid to argue the point, "How, where?"

She stopped what she was doing and reached over, pulling the clean towels off the counter onto the floor. "Right here," she said, spreading them out with her foot and then grabbing him around the waist with both hands as she laid down on them, taking him with her.

"Kari!" he grabbed the edge of the counter catching himself before falling to his knees.

He'd seen her this way before, it was flattering to him but it could also be intense, the things she would ask him to do and the time it took. He glanced at his watch again, knowing he didn't have the time. He looked down at her as she scooted out of her panties, tossing them over her head out the laundry room door and then began to undo the rest of the buttons on her dress, never taking her eyes off of his. He positioned himself over top of her on all fours, forgetting about his watch, that little stunt she just performed changed his mind. He had time.

"You kind of caught me off guard," he teased, "what if I can't rise to the occasion."

She pulled down on his hips, "Just picture me wrapped in bacon and if that doesn't work," she slipped her hand inside of his pants.

"OH," he moaned and laughed at her bacon remark at the same time, "that's going to work."

* * *

Kari rested her forehead on his shoulder, still clinging tightly to his body as he laid her back down on the towels, "Feel better?"

She mumbled incoherently, letting him know she was.

He smoothed her hair away from her face, kissing her.

"Mmm, you're a good husband."

He kissed her again, "How lucky are we, huh?"

"Life is good, isn't it?" She put her arm around his waist and wrapped a leg around his.

He propped his head on his hand, smiling at her, "Pretty damn good."

She gathered a couple of towels under her head for a pillow, "The realtor called this morning. The sale of Ally's house closes on Friday."

"You feel ok about that?"

"Yes, mission accomplished."

"You did good." He kissed her forehead, "Seven girls, five college degrees."

"Seven college degrees," she corrected him, "Belinda and Reyna will graduate UCLA in two years."

"I don't know how you did it and still had two babies, ran this house, plus sold all those drawings in the mean time. You're amazing." The way he looked at her, she could tell he meant every word he said.

"I couldn't have done any of it without you."

"I don't believe that for a second."

"If I didn't have you standing behind me the last five years, holding me up, I never could have managed it." She reached up and kissed him, "Believe what you want, but you are just as responsible."

He smiled, "What's next?"

She tilted her head back, looking out the laundry room door. "We really need to start looking for a new house," she sighed almost regretful.

"I know. I think we've both been putting it off, but it has to happen. We can't bring another baby here." His hand moved down over her stomach, feeling the small bump that was forming.

"I like the idea of keeping this place though. I would really like to retire here. It would be perfect."

He nodded in agreement, "I'll never forget the first time you came here, standing by the front door, so afraid to breathe."

She stroked his arm that caressed her belly. She would never forget that night either; it was the very beginning of her life with him, which she cherished every second, of every day. "I love you. I love you so much." Without any notice she suddenly burst into tears, hugging him.

Steve chuckled, "I know it's painful isn't it."

"I just feel so happy right now," she sobbed, "I don't know why I'm crying."

"It wouldn't be because your pregnant and your hormones are raging out of control?"

She smiled, wiping her eyes, knowing that was a big part of it, "Maybe," she laughed at herself.

"I have to get back to work. I'm not going to leave you in an emotional mess am I?"

She laughed, pushing on his shoulder, sniffing, "No! I'm fine."

He got up on his knees, pulling his pants up, "You get some of the McGarrett lovin and it turns you to mush. Stay out of this room the rest of the day or you won't be able to function." He looked back at her, giving her a teasing smile.

Kari rolled her eyes, "Whatever."

* * *

JD stood next to the school flag pole waiting for his Mom to pick him up. He looked up when he heard his name.

"Hi JD, is your Mom coming today?" Bobby Caldwell's Mom yelled from the rolled down window of their car as Bobby got inside. She was late also and JD was never still there when she picked up Bobby.

"Yes."

"Why don't we give her a call?"

"She's coming," JD insisted.

She put the car in park and got out. "What's her phone number and we can call her?"

JD reluctantly agreed and gave her the number. He listened as Mrs. Caldwell talked to his Mom and then could tell from the one-sided conversation that she was going to take him home. He looked at Bobby sitting in the front seat of the car staring at him. He didn't want to ride home with them.

"Here JD," she said, handing him the phone, "Your Mom wants to talk to you."

He took the phone, "Are you coming?"

"Hi honey, I'm so sorry. I got stuck in traffic coming back from the doctor, but I'm almost home so Mrs. Caldwell is going to drop you off."

"I'll wait for you."

"No JD, just go with Mrs. Caldwell."

"Mom," he whined.

"JD!" she scolded, "please don't argue with me on the phone. I'll see you in a couple of minutes. You be polite. Do you understand?"

He looked up at Mrs. Caldwell, "Yes. Goodbye."

"Bye," she replied cheerfully.

JD climbed in the backseat of the Mercedes SUV and fastened his seatbelt. Bobby sat up and glanced back at him, "We don't have a baby seat for you to sit in."

"Bobby!" his Mom scolded, "That's mean to say." She pulled out of the parking lot of the school, heading down a side street toward JD's house.

"Where's my Gameboy?" Bobby said rudely, "You said you were going to bring it."

"It's in the glove box."

Bobby reached inside and pulled out the small computer game, dropping the two tiny game cartridges on the floor. He undid his seatbelt and reached down for them.

"Bobby," his Mother scolded, "put on your seat belt?"

"I dropped my games."

"Put on your seat belt," she said again.

He looked up at her with an angry glare, "I said I dropped my games! So be quiet!"

JD's eyes got wide at the tone and words that came out of Bobby's mouth to his Mother. He watched with wonder at what her reaction was going to be. He sat there shocked and bewildered when she did nothing at all. He couldn't even imagine how much trouble he would be in if he ever told his Mom to be quiet. He was pretty sure though she wouldn't be. She would yell, and then he thought of his Dad and knew for sure he would yell louder.

Bobby sat on the floor of the SUV, reaching under the front seat trying to retrieve his games. His body suddenly lunged back against the front as he heard his Mother scream and slam on the brakes.

JD's neck rubbed the strap of the seatbelt as the car stopped suddenly, causing a welt. He looked toward the front of the car to see what Mrs. Caldwell was screaming at when the window he was sitting next to shattered. He pushed his body back into the seat, stunned and frightened. The man reached inside with a knife, slicing through his seatbelt so quickly JD didn't even see him. His eyes were still closed from the frightening ordeal of the window breaking. He felt a tug on his shirt and before he knew it, he was being pulled out the window of the SUV.


	3. Chapter 3

Kari drove through the neighborhood with one hand on the steering wheel and the other one over her heart. The frantic phone call from Natalie Caldwell was still unclear to her. All she got out of her was that there was some type of accident, something happened to JD and their location. She could hear sirens in the background and knew the street was only minutes from home. She had been sitting in the driveway waiting for them, not wanting to get out because Casey had just fallen asleep in her car seat. She came around the corner of Opihi Street and saw two police cars surrounding the Caldwell's SUV. A group of neighbors had already begun to assemble and gawk at the unusual police activity on their street.

The first thing she noticed was the absence of an ambulance. That gave her a sense of relief; JD couldn't be too badly hurt if they didn't feel the need for that. She stopped about twenty feet away from the activity and quickly got out, running toward the SUV. She came upon a uniformed officer who at first tried to stop her.

"My son!" she gasped. "My son was in that car!"

"Kari?"

She turned and saw Detective Conner Jeffries. They had only met a handful of times at various police functions over the years, but she remembered him fondly as being the detective that had raided the house that Sergius had sent her to the night she met Steve.

She anxiously glanced around the scene, seeing Natalie talking to an officer, "JD! Where's JD?"

He stared at her, almost in a state of shock, suddenly realizing the child taken was JD McGarrett. He heard the first name but didn't think to put the two together. He grabbed the uniformed officer next to him by the arm, "Get a hold of Five O," he shuddered, "Commander McGarrett at Five O, get him down here, now!" He turned back to Kari, gently taking her arm, leading her back over to her car.

"Where is my son!" she yelled, feeling the panic beginning to overtake her.

* * *

"We're on our way." Steve pushed away from his desk, dropping his phone in the side pocket of his pants as he quickly came around his desk. "Hey!" he yelled out to his team, "We've got a carjacking, slash kidnapping over off of East Hind Dr."

Kono came out of her office, holding her vest, "Isn't that over by your house?"

"Yes, the address is over by JD's school." Steve didn't even consider the dreadful idea that it might have to do with his family. That was impossible; JD would be with Kari by this time of day.

"God, I hope it's not a kid," Chin said grimly.

"Me too," Danny agreed as they followed each other out the glass doors of the office.

* * *

Kari felt the ground disappear from under her. Her knees buckled as Connor grabbed her by the arms. Her face was a sheet of white and she took short quick gasps of air, seeing the world around her begin to spin. "Steve," she muttered between gasps, knowing he was the one person she needed at that very second, not only for her stability but she knew he would find their son in the shortest amount of time.

"We called him. He's on his way." He carefully led her over to her own SUV, opening up the backdoor and noticing right away the sleeping baby in the back. He sat Kari on the edge; afraid she was going to hyperventilate. "Kari, we are doing everything possible to find him. We will find him." He tried to reassure her.

She held onto the door handle with one hand and the sleeve of his shirt with the other. "Why?" she stuttered, "Why would they take him?" Her whole body was shaking and then she pictured him, scared and alone with strangers doing god only knew what to him. The magnitude of it came crushing down on her. She slid off the edge of the car and fell to her knees on the ground, not feeling the impact of asphalt against bare skin, covering her face with her hands, sobbing uncontrollably in a way that made even Connor look around him for help.

Connor stayed with her until he saw the silver Camaro pull up and then Kono's car behind them, knowing Steve and Danny had arrived. He took a deep breath and stood up, "Steve's here Kari." He looked down at her, but knew she didn't hear him. The baby in the backseat had awoken and was beginning to show signs of crying as well. He decided the baby was fine for now and made his way over to the Camaro, not sure what he was going to say to Steve. It was the most difficult thing he'd had to do since being on the job. This seemed surreal, things like this didn't happen to cops, they were immune to it, but as he made his way over to him and the sound of Kari crying behind him, the grotesque reality of what was happening to them was all too real.

Steve got out of the driver's seat, scanning the area around the police cars and Mercedes SUV. He right away noticed the glass on the ground by the back window. He saw Connor approaching him, not noticing his wife's car in the background. He met him halfway with Danny at his side. "Hey Connor, what do we got?" He could tell right away by the look on his face that it wasn't good.

"Steve," he spoke and then had to take a deep breath, glancing over at Danny, "Steve, I," he began again, "I really don't know how to tell you this." He turned toward the SUV, pointing at the backseat, "JD," he sighed, "JD was in the car. He was in the backseat."

Steve's expression became bewildered, "What? My JD?" He put his hand on his chest acknowledging himself.

Kono impulsively grabbed Chin by the arm, not believing what she was hearing.

Danny's eyes instantly averted to the crime scene, trying the same as Steve to take in what Connor was telling them.

Steve shook his head. "JD is with Kari this time of day," he argued, assuming there must be some kind of mistake. He didn't even recognize that Mercedes, why would JD be in it?

Connor stepped out of the visual path that led to Steve's own car and the sight of Kari halfway hidden from the backdoor, still sitting on the ground. He then began to fill him in on the details of what had happened and everything they knew so far.

Steve stared at Kari kneeling on the ground in obvious pain and listened to Connor described in detail his worst nightmare. His son was missing and presumed kidnapped. He had used that very sentence before when speaking to family members of victims, but hearing it being used to describe your own child was like being stabbed in the heart. The indescribable fear that shot through him was traumatizing. He looked at Connor, trying desperately to hear him but only bits and pieces could get through the mass confusion he was feeling inside; he heard broken window, something about his seatbelt, a blue sedan and the 911 call. But all he could picture was his son and how scared he must be, and he couldn't get to him, because he had no idea where he was. Someone had taken him from the backseat of the car and drove off; they had taken his son! His little boy was missing!

'_Kari_!' he thought suddenly. He looked back over toward her still in the same position on the ground and pushed past Connor, running to her. JD was his son and he loved him more than anything and would die for him, but he knew that whatever he was feeling, Kari was experiencing it ten fold. He couldn't get to her fast enough. He needed her just as much as she needed him at that very moment. He heard Casey in the backseat screaming as if she also knew of the turmoil her family was going through. He bent down in front of Kari, putting his arms around her and lifting her up off the ground.

She felt her body become weightless as he lifted her up. She knew right away it was Steve and let herself fall into him. She grabbed handfuls of his shirt, clinging to him as if he could make it all go away by just being there and holding her. He could always make her better. "Steve," she moaned, "you have to find him." Her voice filled with so much agony and fear he could feel it all they way to his core. He held her tighter wanting it desperately to stop; he couldn't bear to see her this way.

"I will baby, I will." He stroked her long blond hair, wishing he could disappear inside it, not unlike nights when he would come home from a bad case. He could crawl into bed next to her, and the moment he put his arms around her and nestled into that blond heaven, everything vanished except for her. But now he had to be strong for her and for JD. He couldn't go where she was, he wanted too and was so close, but he couldn't.

Kono climbed in the backseat from the other side of the car and took a red-faced Casey out of her car seat. She was reaching for her Mom and Dad not understanding why they were right there but not coming for her, no matter how loud she screamed. "It's ok Casey." Kono said in a soothing voice, having to wipe away the tears in her own eyes so she could undo the straps. She pulled her out of the car and walked away, bouncing her and holding her tightly. She wanted her Mom and Dad and had no patience for Kono, regardless of her passionate attempt.

Danny backed away from Steve and Kari, going over to the crime scene, talking himself down, '_Ok, get it together. Get it together_. _JD needs you_.' He stood in the middle and yelled out, "Everyone over here!" he motioned with his arms, "I want every officer right here, right now!" They quickly joined in a small group before him. "Ok, I want to know what each one of you knows up to this point," he pointed at each man, "I want individual case run down. If the guy next to you has the same info, I don't care! I want to hear it again in your own words."

Chin came and stood next to him. "There are tire tracks over here. They were in a hurry. I'm going to call in more officers and have them start knocking on doors in the neighborhood, get a direction of which way they went out, east or west."

Danny looked over at him and nodded. They stared at each other for longer than usual, knowing what the other was feeling. JD was family in every sense of the word. He was Steve's kid, but they all loved and cared for him as if he was one of their own.

Chin's attitude turned confident, "We're going to find him."

"You're goddamn right we are." He looked back over toward Steve and Kari, "We'll find him." As if he was telling them too.

Steve pulled back, looking down at her. Her eyes were already swollen and her face was pale with fresh tears spilling down her cheeks. His initial fear for JD turned to concern for his whole family, including the baby growing inside of her. She was hysterical. "Kari," he bent down to try to make eye contact with her, "Honey I want you to go to the hospital. I'm going to send you there so they can keep an eye on you."

"No," she shook her head, "no Steve! I want to be at home incase he comes there."

"Kari, I'm afraid to leave you like this." He felt a hand on his shoulder and turned to see Chin.

"I'll call Malia and have her go to the house."

He felt relieved from that, knowing Malia was one of her best friends and would take good care of her. He looked through the car and saw Kono trying to soothe Casey.

"Kari," he said calmly, "I'm going to have Kono take you home and Malia is going to come over, ok?"

She nodded, laying her head back on his shoulder. He bent down and scooped her up in arms, walking around to the passenger side. Chin ran ahead of him and opened the door. He slid her in and reached across, fastening her seat belt. He felt her gentle touch on his face. The sorrow in her eyes was almost more than he could take.

"I trust you. Find our son, bring him home too me." New tears streamed down her face.

"I will. I promise I will." He kissed her cheek and closed the door.

He made his way over to Kono. Casey stretched her arms out to him as he approached, her loud cry telling him just how angry she was for being ignored. "Will you take Kari and Casey home and wait there until Malia comes?" he asked, taking the baby from her. He didn't wait for a response because he already knew the answer was yes. He walked away from her, trying to soothe his baby girl. He pulled down on the pink blouse that was riding up her back and slipped the sock back on that dangled from her foot. She stared at him, still gasping for air from her temper tantrum, but to his relief the crying had subsided. Her round cheeks were red, which made her blue eyes even that more apparent. The platinum blond hair had managed to remain in the flower clip, except for a few strands around her face that were stuck to her head from sweating. He reached up and wiped her perfect little nose with his thumb and index finger, wiping it on his pants.

"I'm sorry sweetie," he whispered, pulling her head down on his shoulder.

She seemed satisfied with that, forgiving him. She stuck her thumb in her mouth as her little hand touched his face, rubbing it up and down over his whiskers, giggling as his five o'clock shadow tickled her palm. It was a simple gesture she had discovered recently and loved to do. It had also become one of Steve's favorite moments between the two of them, and for her to perform it at that very second was like a gift.

He made his way slowly back over to the car, giving her more time to calm. He watched Danny and Chin take over the crime scene and his thoughts went back to JD. He had to fight back the panic that returned of knowing he was with strangers. The thoughts that tried to creep inside of the type of people who had him were horrific, but he pushed them away, refusing to go there or he'd go mad. He chose another path and let himself believe they just wanted something, but why JD? Why not the others in the car, it was as if he was targeted for some reason. He feared that someone was planning revenge against him because of his line of work. If that were the case and something happened to JD because of him, it would ruin him for life.

He came around the back of the SUV as Chin handed Kono her laptop through the driver's window. He could see from the backseat, Kono holding Kari's hand and not letting go. He was just as relieved to have her there for Kari, as he was Malia. He kissed the top of Casey's head and set her back in her car seat. She began to resist as he reached over her picking up her toy animal that resemble a fat, furry cat. "Look what I found. Poofy." He squeezed it and the familiar sound made her laugh and forget about the crying. She took it from him and squeezed it over and over as he strapped her in. He looked in the front seat and saw Kari staring at him. She reached her hand out and neither one said a word as he took it and squeezed it, reassuring her with his eyes that his promise was good.

He closed the back door and waved to Casey with his fingers as Kono drove off. He turned away, clasping his fingers together behind his neck, pulling down at the same time as he forced his head back. The resistance was a stress relief that wasn't working. He was so close to that place again, desperately fighting against it.

* * *

JD's whole body shook as he lay on what felt like a bed, but he couldn't tell because his eyes were covered and his hands were tied behind his back. The crying had subsided to small whimpers, wondering where he was and why he was there. He could smell and feel the wet in his pants that had seeped out of him in the last few minutes, not even remembering it happening. Every little noise frightened him. He didn't understand what he had done that was so bad that someone would want to tie his hands and cover his eyes. He wondered if his Mom and Dad knew he was there, but quickly pushed that away. They would never let someone do that to him. With that same thought came the terrorizing realization that his parents didn't know where he was. The crying returned with a vengeance.

"Daddy! Mommy!" he cried out over and over between sobs. The louder he called for them the more frightened he became and the harder it became to breath. He began to cough and gag until he was on the verge of throwing up, which intensified his fear even more.

"Bobby!"

He heard a voice and froze. The only sound in the room was his short gasps for air, until the footsteps. Someone was walking closer to him.

"That's better, Bobby."

'_Bobby_!' JD thought, '_is Bobby there too_?'

"I say we tape his mouth shut."

JD heard a different voice. This one sounded mad.

"No need to do that," the other one said, "he's going to be quiet now. Aren't you Bobby?"

JD didn't say a word, waiting for Bobby to say something.

"Hey!" The mean one poked him with something. "Answer him! Are you going to be quiet you little shit!"

JD was confused, "I'm JD," he said barely above a whisper. "Is Bobby here?" He hoped he was and that would mean he wasn't all alone, even if it was Bobby.

"JD?" the quiet one asked, "is that what they call you instead of Bobby?"

He shook his head, speaking just a little louder, "No, my name is JD. I want to go home," he whimpered.

"You're Bobby Caldwell!" The quiet voice became stern, ignoring his pleading.

JD froze up again, afraid to say anything else.

"What's your name?" The mean one poked him again.

JD squirmed from the jab to his back, "JD McGarrett."

"He's lying!" the mean one yelled.

"Lying! How does a fucking five-year old know to lie about that?"

JD heard a scuffle in the room as Bryce Timmons faced off with his little brother, Lenny.

"You stupid fuck!" Bryce shoved him, "You had one job! All you had to do was grab the kid!"

"He was the only kid in the car! How was I supposed to know? What was I supposed to do, ask for ID?" Lenny put his hands up as Bryce began to slap him over and over. He fell against the bed, making it shake and scrape across the wood floor.

JD pulled his legs up to his chest and began screaming for his Mom and Dad again. He wanted to go home!


	4. Chapter 4

Danny acknowledged Kono with a slight head toss as she passed him with a distraught Kari and Casey in the car. He approached Steve hesitantly and watched him pace back forth in the same spot with his hands clasped behind his neck, not sure which emotional state he was experiencing at the moment, anger, dread or complete panic. He assumed all three, but hoped that anger was building over the other two. He hated to admit it, but Steve was most proficient when he was angry. His mind seemed to be able to take in details, calculate them and more often than not spit out the equation they were looking for when he felt under pressure. A mental trait Danny knew came from the training when he was a Seal. It drove him crazy most days, but today he was counting on it.

"Steve," he said firmly but with a hint of gentleness, knowing this was quite possibly the worst day of his life. He turned to him and Danny was right on cue, all three emotions were staring right back at him. Danny couldn't help but flinch at the obvious panic that was most apparent on his face. Steve was his partner on most days, but today what they were experiencing was personal, so at that moment the person standing before him was his best friend, more so than his partner.

"Danny?" he said his name in the form of a question, not asking him for answers but more for direction. His hands came from around his neck and cupped over his mouth, closing his eyes trying with everything he had not to lose it right there. He was relying on Danny to talk him down.

Danny came up, putting his hand on the back of Steve's neck, gently squeezing it, "Listen too me!" he said firmly and then continued in a more placid tone, "You need to pull yourself together. These guys were sloppy. I can visually see fingerprints on the outside of the car door where JD was sitting. There are tire marks. The driver had exposed tattoos. There are so many clues we have to work off and we haven't even had a chance to interview the woman yet." He let go of him and stepped back, "So let's stop wasting time and go talk to her."

Steve nodded, letting everything he said soak in.

"Do you hear me?"

"Yes," Steve took a deep breath, rubbing his hands over his face as if he was wiping away all the distractions from what he needed to focus on. "Yes, I got it."

"Ok then," he pointed toward the SUV, "let's go talk to Mrs. Caldwell."

Natalie Caldwell wiped her eyes as Steve and Danny approached her.

Bobby sat on the curb behind her watching the activity. "Can we go home now?" he whined.

"Sit still," she scolded, not understanding why he wasn't more upset over his friend's disappearance. '_He's turning into his Father,_' she thought sadly.

"Mrs. Caldwell," Danny said, "I'm Detective Williams." He motioned to Steve, "This is Commander McGarrett." He paused, seeing the look on her face become mortified.

"JD's Father," she gasped. "Oh my God! I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry!" she cried putting her hands over her mouth as fresh tears welled in her eyes.

Steve could see she was visibly shaken and traumatized by the event. He ruled her out as a suspect, for now. He wanted to feel sorry for the obvious guilt she was feeling over the entire event, but he just couldn't bring himself to forgive her, it was all too fresh. "Why was JD with you?"

"Kari was running late after a doctor appointment," she took a deep breath, wanting to make sure she told him everything she knew, "JD was there at the school when I picked up my son Bobby, so we used my cell phone to call her. We agreed that I would take him home."

Steve knew that name, Bobby Caldwell. He was the kid that teased JD and Parker. He glanced over at him sitting on the curve. "Is that Bobby?"

"Yes," she sniffed, wiping her nose with the tissue.

Danny flipped through his notes from the officers who had already interviewed her. "Did you recognize the two men that took JD?"

"No!" she shook her head, "No, I've never seen them before."

Steve walked over and squatted down in front of him, "Hi Bobby. I'm Steve, JD's Dad." His voice didn't reflect the typical greetings to a five-year old. It was monotone; this kid had bullied JD to the point where he hated school. He didn't blame Bobby, he was only five, but wondered where the bullying instinct came from. Even so, Steve's loyalty lay with his son at that moment, and anyone who had caused him any pain was on his short list, even a five-year old.

Bobby looked from Steve to the gun on his hip. He reached his hand out to it, "Do you shoot people with that?"

Steve grabbed his wrist before he could get his hand on it, "I use it to defend myself against criminals." He held onto him gently, yet firm, getting his attention. "Did you see who it was that took JD?"

Bobby tried to pull his hand away, but Steve held on, "No. I was picking up my game."

Steve let go of him and looked over his shoulder at Natalie for an explanation.

"He had dropped his game on the floor in the front seat. He took his seat belt off and was on the floor trying to get it when everything happened." She wiped her hand over her forehead, still clearly distraught, "it all happened so fast. They came out of no where and then the window was broken and I saw JD being pulled out." She started to cry again as a black truck with the words Caldwell Construction on the driver's side door came up to the scene, screeching its brakes.

Two uniformed officers intercepted him before he had a chance to get out. They spoke for a couple of seconds and then let him proceed.

Steve stood up as he and Danny both watched a man get out and quickly walk over to them. He was about six feet tall and even though he wore a shirt and tie, it was apparent that at one point in his life he had worked the manual labor side of the business. His face was a leathery tan from over exposure to the sun making him look aged, even though he couldn't have been much older than Steve and Danny, and his hands showed clear signs of old calluses. His build resembled a firmer shape at one time, but the administrative side of the job had softened him.

"What happened?" He blurted out as he approached.

Natalie turned to him for comfort and Steve watched as he dismissed his wife's clear need for her husband's security. Instead of hugging her, he took her firmly by the elbow, again demanding answers, "What happened?"

In a flash, Steve understood where Bobby got his attitude.

"Robert," Natalie cried, not seeming all that surprised by her husband's brass behavior. "It's so awful!" she put her hands over her face.

He gently shook her, "Calm down! You don't look hurt." He glanced down at his son, "Bobby come here!"

The boy practically jumped to attention, not hesitating for a second, standing next to his Mother rather than his Father. Danny gave Steve a look and they both knew what the other was thinking. '_This guy was a piece of work_.'

"I'm Detective Williams" Danny said, not bothering to offer him a hand. "This is Commander McGarrett." He motioned to Steve, who also neglected the friendly gesture but in return offered him a stern glare. "Your wife and son witnessed a kidnapping that involved the son of Commander McGarrett."

Robert's face became stunned, "What?" He looked at his wife, who nodded her head.

"It all happened so fast Robert. There was nothing I could do." She seemed to Steve and Danny that she was pleading her case to him, "They stopped in front of me and the next thing I knew they were taking JD from the backseat."

"Ok!" he gripped her more firmly and gave her a look as if telling her to be quiet.

"We were in the middle of interviewing your wife and son when you got here." Steve said, "We need to get what we can while it's still fresh in their mind so I can get a lead on who and why they took my son."

Robert let go of Natalie and wiped the sweat off his upper lip with the space between his thumb and index finger as if he were contemplating Steve's request, not seeming to care that a five-year-old boy was missing. "Let me call my lawyer and we can all sit down." He reached in his pocket for his phone.

Steve's anger reared hits ugly head, having no more patients for this person or the time. "Did you not hear me?" he yelled, taking a step toward him. "My son is missing! He was taken from your car that your wife was driving! He is out there somewhere with strangers and every second I stand here listening to your bullshit suggestions is time I'm wasting on finding out where he is!"

Danny reached out grabbing his arm, pulling him back, just slightly. He had had enough as well. "I don't understand why you would think your wife would need to speak in front of a lawyer. We are only gathering facts from what she witnessed. We don't suspect her as being involved. Unless maybe you seem to think she is," he focused on Natalie. "Are you hiding something from us that could hinder this investigation?" Danny asked her bluntly. He already knew Natalie was innocent, but was pushing the buttons of the husband. It was as plain as day to him that Robert Caldwell was not only an asshole but was clearly apprehensive about speaking with the police.

Natalie's expression was filled with horror at Danny's accusation, "No!" she looked at Steve, "No! I have nothing to hide! I would never do anything to harm JD or any child! I'll help anyway I can!"

She glanced at her husband for reassurance who glared at her with a silent look that she thought only she could see, but Steve and Danny both caught the intimidation.

She looked at Danny, not able to face Steve, "I," she shuddered, "I really have told you and the other officers all I know. I want to help, but I'm not sure there is anything else to say that I haven't already."

"If you give us your number," Robert interrupted, "we'll call if she remembers anything."

Danny reached in his wallet taking a card and handing it to him, "We're available twenty-four seven." He looked at Natalie, "If you remember anything, even the slightest thing, please call us."

She nodded, finally looking at Steve who hadn't taken his eyes off of her for a second, pleading to the Mother in her to help him. "I'm so sorry. Please let me know if you or Kari need anything."

Robert tugged on her arm, "Are we free to go?"

"Yes," Danny said in a low growl, "but the car stays, it's evidence. Someone will get a hold of you when you're able to pick it up."

"Fine," he pulled on Natalie, "let's go. Come on Bobby."

Steve watched them walk away over Danny's shoulder as he turned to him. "That son of bitch," he snarled, "he's guilty of something. We should take her in."

"On what charges? We can't hold her for being a witness. Besides," he looked over his shoulder as Robert hustled them into the car, "it would waste the time we need to investigate him. I have a feeling he knew this was coming."

Steve held his hand out to the car. "Then why don't we bring him in?"

"On what charges?"

"I don't know," Steve through his arms up in frustration, "for being an asshole, obstructing an investigation. Let's just get him in the room and get him to talk. If he knows something about JD, I'll get it out of him one way or another!"

"That's a great idea, Steve. He lawyers up, you go to jail and in the mean time we waste a whole day and all we do," he pointed at the ground raising his voice, "is end up right back here where we started!" He took a breath and motioned with his hands for both of them to calm down. "We've got a lead right over here," he pointed to the SUV, "Chin's running the prints from the car. If something comes up we'll follow that lead. If not, we go back to the station and to our second lead and start digging into Caldwell's life." He didn't fully disagree with Steve's idea, but they needed to be smart about this and not let their emotions distract them from taking the shortest path back to JD.

Steve nodded his approval. "Ok," he cupped his hands over his mouth, looking at Danny, "You're right." The panic began to set in again, "It's going to be dark soon."

Danny gently smacked him on the belly with the back of his hand "Hey! We're going to find him. In a couple of days this will all just be a bad memory." Steve nodded in agreement, but Danny knew just as well as he did that it didn't always turn out good. He loved JD as much as if he was his own son, but he couldn't show that right now. He had to keep his head and his thoughts clear for both of them.

* * *

JD dreamt of home. He sat on the couch snuggled close in between his Mom and Dad. They were all watching TV and laughing with him at his favorite cartoon. He had to pee but didn't want to get up and leave the room; afraid they wouldn't be there when he got back. He squirmed on the couch feeling it coming but still wouldn't get up. He finally looked up at his Dad, "I have to pee Dad, but I don't want to go alone. Will you come with me?" He stared up at him, seeing the only person in his small world that was perfect to him. Everything his Dad did or told him, JD took away as being the one and only way. His Dad knew everything and always had the right answers for him.

"No JD. You're a big, strong boy. Sometimes you have to be brave without Mom and Dad there to help."

"Ok Dad," he squirmed off the couch not feeling the fear anymore. His Mom smiled down at him sweetly, like she always did.

"JD?" his Dad said, putting his hand on his shoulder, "It's ok to be afraid. It's how you face that fear that really matters. Look really hard at what you're afraid of and most times it's really not that scary after all."

"Ok Dad," He laughed as his hand gripped his shoulder and squeezed, tickling him there like he always did. The tickling turned to shaking, becoming more violent until he suddenly opened his eyes, waking up. He was instantly thrown back into reality and his dreadful situation. His Dad's strong presence was still fresh as if he had been right there with him. The shaking continued.

"Hey wake up!" Lenny tormented, shaking his shoulder.

"I'm awake." JD said, feeling the urge to pee again. His pants were already soaked from the last time and he was thirsty and hungry. The dream made him miss his Mom and Dad even more. His Dad's words swirled around his head. He had said that same quote to him many times before whenever he was scared of something, but for the first time, it was as if JD finally understood what it really meant.

Lenny sat back, looking down at the little boy, not feeling any kind of threat from him. They still weren't sure what they were going to do with him after discovering he wasn't Bobby Caldwell. He slipped the knife under the plastic tie and cut it away. "Are you hungry?"

JD felt his hands being released but his arms were sore from being behind his back for so long and his eyes were still covered. He felt a poke.

"Are you hungry or not?"

"Yes," he replied, "I have to pee. When I can I go home?"

Lenny wiped his hand through his hair. "Shut up." He leaned over taking his arm, pulling him off the bed.

"Ouch," he moaned.

"Don't be a pussy."

JD didn't know what that meant but he was pretty sure it was bad. He stumbled behind Lenny as he practically dragged him to the bathroom. He reached up with his free hand and pulled off the blindfold over his eyes. He blinked several times before his eyes adjusted to the lights.

Lenny turned the light on and looked down at him, not realizing he'd taken off the cloth from his eyes. "What the fuck!" He shook JD violently by the arm he was holding, banging his head against the door frame. "Who said you could take that off you little shit!"

JD lifted his hand to his hurt head, trying to pull his arm free from the tight grip and trying to protect another blow against the door as Lenny continued to shake him. He could feel the pee running down the inside of his pants and the tears blinded him. The shaking suddenly stopped and Lenny bent down in front of him.

"I should stick you in the oven for doing that!"

JD stared at him through his tears. The fierce look in Lenny's eyes was beyond frightening. He'd never been so afraid of another person. He stepped back and ran into the wall, trying to get away from him.

Lenny stood up and JD ran past him into the bathroom trying to slam the door on him. He looked up and saw his hand pushing it back open. He walked backward away from him, curling his hands up in his shirt nervously. "I want to go home," he cried.

Lenny mocked him in a little girl's voice. "I want to go home. Mommy, Daddy," he teased. "Maybe I'll put your Mom and Dad in the oven too."

JD knew without a doubt that his Father could beat him up without even trying. He wished he were there now so he could show him. His anger began to build from the torment and his Father's words from the dream suddenly flashed before him. This person was just mean and mean people were punished. The words came flying out of his mouth. He'd reached his breaking point and wanted to go home. "My Dad is a policeman! He puts bad people like you in jail!" Instead of stepping back, he took a step toward him, "He's going to punch you in the face and shoot you with his gun too!" All his braveness vanished as Lenny lunged at him.

Bryce came in the house with a bag from Target and food from McDonalds. He dropped everything on the table when he heard JD scream.

Lenny held JD's face under the water in the bathtub, counted to five and then pulled him back up, repeating the torture. The door flew open and he dropped him, backing away as Bryce came at him.

Bryce reached in the tub and balanced JD so he was sitting up. He stood up and clenched his fist at his brother. "If you touch him one more time Lenny, I swear to God, I'll bust your teeth out!"

"He was being a little fuck. He took off his blindfold and he stinks!"

He looked back down at JD, who sat in the tub still fully clothed, rubbing his hands over his face, trying to catch his breath. He turned back to Lenny, "What's wrong with you man? He's a little kid. He's here for one purpose; to get us the money that Caldwell owes us. That's it! He's not for your enjoyment!"

"He's not even the Caldwell kid! How are we going to get the money now? Did you know his Dad's a cop?"

Bryce's expression turned to concern. "A cop?"

"We should get rid of him."

"No," Bryce shook his head, "we stick with the plan. We still make the call. Besides, Caldwell's kid was just the insurance that he'd pay up. It doesn't matter what kid we have, Caldwell knows we got the make on him. We're the only ones that know of that body buried in the concrete. If he doesn't want to go to prison, he'll pay."

"That still doesn't help the fact that we are holding a cop's kid hostage, and he's seen our face." Lenny took Bryce by the arm, pushing him out of the bathroom. "Look, I know I fucked up by grabbing the wrong kid, but it's not like we can play this thing like we planned. He saw us!" Lenny's face switched, "If it comes down to it, I'll do it. You don't even have to be around."

Bryce pulled his arm away angrily, wiping his hand under his nose, "We stick to the plan!" He pushed past his brother and went back into the bathroom, not even wanting to consider Lenny's idea.

Lenny knew Bryce was stronger and smarter than he was, but he was also to naïve when it came to the harsh realities of life. Lenny had done time in jail for assault and attempted rape. He wasn't about to go back because of some smart ass little kid.


	5. Chapter 5

Kari laid down on her bed after taking a pill that Malia had prescribed for her. Maggie sat down next to her, caressing her back while Kono and Malia stood nearby. She took the tear soaked towel from Kari's hands and replaced it with a fresh one. She clenched it tightly in both hands under her chin, still trembling.

"You try to rest honey," Maggie said, knowing it was a cliché of words, but said them anyway.

She looked up at her using the towel to wipe away new tears forming, "If Steve calls you'll wake me up?" her voice still so full of desperation and fear over her missing little boy. She didn't want to go sleep but knew it was best for the baby. She needed to calm down and didn't have the resolve to do it on her own.

"Of course we will," Maggie said soothingly, gliding her hand down Kari's hair in a motherly way, relieved to see the medicine begin to take effect. She looked exhausted. The incident had torn them all up, but Kari was beside herself with worry and fear.

Kono felt her phone vibrate in her pocket and pulled it out seeing Danny's name. She nudged Malia and showed her the screen. They stepped out into the hall, closing the door behind them.

Malia reached over taking her hand, both women hoping for the best, but preparing themselves for the worst.

"Danny," she answered almost breathless, "what's the news so far?"

Malia watched her face closely, silently praying for JD. She could tell almost instantly that it wasn't the bad news they were dreading.

"That's great!" Kono looked at her and smiled, "Yes, Malia and Maggie are here."

"Did they find JD?" Malia asked impatiently.

Kono's smile disappeared as she shook her head in reply. Her attention went back to the phone call. "Ok. I'll meet you out front." She hung up. "They got the prints off the SUV and it came back with a hit; an ex con, Lenny Timmons." She made her way to the stairs, "We got an address. They're picking me up right now. I'll call if we find anything," she said over her shoulder, running down the steps.

* * *

Steve took the lead up the stairs to Lenny's apartment. Danny followed behind with their guns drawn. Kono stood below the balcony, while Chin took the back by the bedroom window.

The next-door neighbor came out as he took the last step. She gasped seeing the two of them with their guns.

Steve lifted his shirt, exposing his badge, "Get back inside," he whispered loudly.

Danny positioned himself on the last step, ready to enter first. He nodded to Steve to go.

He easily kicked in the cheap wooden door, practically tearing it from the hinges.

Danny ran in with his gun held out in front him, "Police!" he shouted, scanning the living room and kitchen of the small apartment.

Steve flew past him, heading down the hallway toward the bedrooms, "JD!" he yelled out, stopping at the bathroom, looking in the shower and then into the first bedroom as Danny checked the other one. They searched through empty closets and under the beds, only to find no one. It was their only lead and they could tell the place had been vacant for a while so there was no reason to believe they would be returning.

"Fuck!" Steve yelled, punching the wall as he came out of the bedroom. He had suppressed all his anger and fear but had reached his breaking point. He'd never experienced a hysterical moment in his life, but he felt the power of it now, knowing his little boy was out there probably scared out of his mind, suffering through god only knew what. He was his Father, his ultimate protector and he felt completely helpless. "Fuck!" he growled with clenched teeth and hands, coming back down the hallway as Chin and Kono came in. "You fucking son of bitch!" He took the end of the dinning table and flipped it over against the wall, producing another hole. "Where's my son!" He grabbed one of the chairs and threw it against the TV that sat on a stand in the corner, just missing Chin and Kono by only a couple of feet but hitting the television dead on.

Kono stepped outside, not sure what was going to happen next and didn't want to experience it. She could only imagine what he was going through and never thought she would ever see him of all people lose it like that, but under the circumstances, she didn't know how he couldn't.

Chin and Danny surrounded him but still kept a distance as he paced back and forth, knocking the other chairs out of his way, continuing to shout out swear words that neither one had ever heard him say before and viable threats to Lenny Timmons with no regard to who was listening.

He stopped pacing and looked directly at Danny with wild eyes and a tight fist raised as if he might hit him. "If that motherfucker touches one hair on JD, I'll blow his fucking head off!"

"I know. I know you will." Danny said agreeably. He did the only thing he could and just amused him. He didn't think it was the right time to use the word 'calm,' it might make him even angrier. "I'll even hold him down for you, but right now we need to search this apartment and see if we can find another lead."

"I'm going to break every bone in his body!" His voice shook a little as the rage began to settle into a fuming anger.

Chin stepped up, "We're all behind you Steve. We all want a crack at this prick and we're going to get it too, because we're going to find JD. There's no doubt in my mind about that."

Steve stared at him, breathing heavily from his outburst. He turned to Danny who watched him with a look of apprehension as if he didn't know how to react to him. He glanced back at Chin who looked at him the same way. It was then that he noticed Kono had even left the room because of his temper. He wiped the back of his hand across his mouth, not ever feeling that out of control before. His emotions flipped sides in a matter of seconds. He was the leader of this team, but at that moment he felt like he had let them done, and wasn't helping the situation but only making it worse by destroying possible evidence and more importantly, time.

Danny recognized the mental fatigue plaguing him and knew what was best for him. "I think you should go home for a while."

Steve shook his head, "I'm ok," he tried to tell himself and convince Danny too, looking around the room at the mess he made. "I'm good."

"You need to go home and be with your wife. You should be with your family," Danny said, making his point that there would be no argument. He was going home. "You need to be with Kari for a while."

"I can't leave!" he said adamantly, "I need to be here!"

"Listen to me!" Danny pushed, "I know JD is YOUR son but he's like our kid too!" he motioned with his hand to Chin and Kono who had come back inside the room, "Don't think for one second Steve, that we won't turn over every stone and break down every door until we find him!" he grabbed him by the arm, making his point clear, "We are on a time crunch here, and you are not helping the situation!" He let go of him, speaking more calmly, "You need to be with your family right now and they need to be with you. Go home and let us handle this."

He knew he was right, but it was still so hard to leave, even though he knew without a doubt all three of them would work tirelessly until they found him. But it was the thought of going home without JD that bothered him even more.

* * *

Steve went to open the front door of his house and hesitated with his hand just inches from the door handle. How was he going to go in there and face Kari without JD? He had promised her he would bring him home and he had never broken a promise to her. He didn't even know what to tell her. The only thing he'd accomplished was loosing his temper.

JD was counting on him and he'd failed him, and now he was failing Kari too. His hand fell to his side and he stepped back. He just couldn't go inside.

He walked around the side of the house making his way to the back. He sat down on the bottom step of the stairs that led up to the back door, staring out at the water. He couldn't remember being this mentally exhausted before in his entire life. He held onto the railing and laid his head against it. He wasn't physically tired, but the emotional strain was playing havoc with him. The last few hours were becoming a blur. He could barely remember the drive home. It was as if he was on autopilot and just followed the path; his mind too consumed with worry over his son.

Maggie closed her back door holding on to the box of baby wipes from her house. She had used up the last of Kari's changing Casey a couple of hours earlier and knew she was due for another diaper soon. It had been a horribly emotional evening for all of them. She had tried to keep Casey occupied so Kari could rest, but it was difficult. Casey knew her Mother was in the house and wanted that attention from her. She contemplated taking her over to her house but felt uneasy leaving Kari alone after Malia had been called back to the hospital and Kono had left.

She walked through the makeshift opening in the bushes that separated their homes. Steve had cut out a large hole, making it into an arch so she wouldn't have to walk down to the beach and around to get back and forth between their houses. She right away noticed him sitting on the step. At first she thought he was asleep but as she approached in the darkness, she saw him staring out toward the water almost like he were in a trance. She stopped in her tracks, almost afraid to approach him, not wanting to hear any bad news about JD. She quickly assumed it was nothing worse or Danny would have been there too. She was also pretty sure the only reason he had come home was because Danny had made him. He looked as bad as Kari did earlier.

She stood next to him, her presence still unaware to him.

"Steven?" she said softly, putting a hand on his shoulder.

He barely flinched as he looked at the hand on him and then up to her face.

She saw just a split second of the smile he always had when they first greeted each other, but knew tonight it was just from habit. He turned his attention back out to the water. His sadness reminded her of the night she had followed him home from her house when he had been mourning Kari's death.

"Any news?"

"No," he replied despairingly.

"Why don't you come inside Steven?" She gently squeezed his shoulder.

He shook his head, "I can't face Kari." He leaned his head back against the railing; "I promised I'd bring him home to her."

"And you will," she slid her hand down, pulling up on him under the arm, "Come inside. Your daughter needs some attention from her Daddy." She knew if that didn't work nothing was going to get him off that step. He needed to be close to his family. She knew they would give him the stability he needed so badly right now. They were his rock and it didn't matter to her what he was feeling at that moment, he needed to be close to them.

His thoughts went to Casey and how upset she was earlier that day, knowing Kari couldn't be there for her like she needed. It was the father in him that forced him up off the step and followed her inside. He scanned the room, hoping not to see Kari just yet, still unsure what he would say. He took off his gun belt, setting it on the kitchen counter. The guilt was staggering, weighing heavy on him as he climbed the stairs behind Maggie. "How's Kari?" he whispered to her.

"Sleeping. Malia gave her something to calm her down."

That image didn't sit well with him. He pictured her earlier, sitting in the car looking at him for direction, begging him to bring home her son and then that promise he made her, which he couldn't deliver. He would have cut off his right arm and given it to her if it would have appeased that frantic look in her eyes. He climbed the stairs still feeling uneasy about being in the house, but his little girl's needs outweighed any concerns he had for himself.

Maggie went inside JD's room. Steve hesitated feeling the pain and guilt tugging on him. He glanced over at he and Kari's room, hoping she wouldn't wake up. He was planning on just getting a couple of hours sleep, if he could, and then slipping out before she woke.

Maggie lifted Casey out of her crib and laid her on JD's bed. "I knew she'd be ready. She had some juice before bed and I didn't want her to wake up wet and start to cry."

At the sight of his daughter, Steve stepped inside and leaned over the bed, kissing her sleepy face. "Hi Sweetie." He took over for Maggie, turning her little body in his direction as he sat down. He undid her diaper, cleaning her up.

Casey stared up at him, drifting in and out of sleep. When he was finished he picked her up and scooted to the end of JD's bed, leaning against the pillows, letting her find a comfortable position on him. Maggie turned the light out, leaving them alone.

Steve scanned JD's room feeling once again the weight of the day hit him. He wasn't sure how he was going to get through tomorrow or even that night. He held Casey a little tighter, feeling the comfort of her. The constant worry and tension over his son was taking a toll on his insides. He felt sick, knowing the dull ache in his stomach wouldn't go away until JD was home.

Maggie leaned over Kari gently waking her, "Kari."

She saw the woman and was instantly awake, "JD!" she gasped.

"No, nothing yet." She regretted having to tell her that, seeing the look of despair come cross her face again. "Steve is home." She brushed her hand over her hair.

Kari looked past her for him.

"He's in JD's room with Casey. He's ashamed to see you."

Kari looked troubled by her statement, "Why?"

Maggie put her hand over her heart, recalling the remorse in his voice; "He didn't bring JD home like he promised." She stood up, "You need to go to him, Kari."

She sat up putting her hand on her swollen belly, feeling the baby kick ever so slightly. She ran her hand through her hair, knowing she looked a mess but didn't care. The well-being of her family was all she cared about. She felt so drained, but didn't hesitate going to him, knowing how hard it must have been for him today as well, maybe even more so because he had to be strong for all of them. It almost broke her heart that he would think she would be angry with him for that. He had never let her down one time, not once, but as she walked in the room she caught a glimpse of the devastation all over his face before he looked away from her. Even in the dark it was so painfully obvious he was feeling everything Maggie had said.

'_Oh Steve,_' she thought, crawling up the bed to him.

Casey was sleeping soundly on his chest, with her head resting just below his shoulder.

He saw her in the doorway and had to turned away, still not able to face the fact that he had let her down. One of his greatest accomplishments in his marriage was his ability to make her happy and fulfill any wish she had, but the only promise that she had ever directly asked for was to bring her son home, and he couldn't deliver. He felt her hand touch him on the arm that held Casey, as she crawled up the bed.

He looked up and didn't see disappointment or resentment on her face, only concern that made him even more displeased with himself. She looked so tired and worn down, it was hard for him to see her this way. He just wanted to make it stop, blaming himself for her sadness. "Kari," he whispered, "I'm so sorry." The pain of saying it was just as devastating to him as the guilt flowing through him, "I can't…"

She put her fingers over his mouth, "Stop," she begged him, tears streaming down her face. Her hand went around his neck as she nestled in close to him, resting her head next to her daughters on his shoulder. She felt his arm encase her, pulling her close. He was her strength, her drive. He was the one that kept her going through this, counting on him to pull them up and out of harms way, like he always did. She needed that security from him so much right now, to tell her everything was going to be ok.

He kissed the top of her head thankful for her forgiveness. He needed her arms around him at that moment more than she knew. He relied on her support just as much as she did his. He didn't have to hide anymore or pretend to be in control. She gave him the freedom to release everything he had been holding in over the last several hours. He could feel it building as her hand gently caressed him, letting him know she was there. She was the one and only person in the world that could bring him to this place, because he knew when he arrived, it was safe and he could lean on her and not feel regret or shame.

She felt the first drop on her cheek that rested below his chin. She could feel his body begin to tremble as several more dripped on her arm that was around his neck. She lifted her head, kissing him on the temple of his bent face.

He leaned into her, gaining comfort by the fact that she understood everything he was going through. They had made that perfect little human being together, raised him together and loved him beyond words, and now they may never see him again. That one thought he had been fighting against all day finally settled into existence and he couldn't control the anguish it brought with it. He wanted to escape it but there was nowhere to go. The only place he could find even a hint of comfort was in his wife.

She never had to be the strong one when they were together. It was always her leaning on him for support. She was always there for him, but he never accepted it from her, until now. With their daughter sleeping soundly between them he slid into the security of his wife's embrace.

"I'm scared for him, Kari. I don't want to be without my little boy," he confessed, weeping silently, resting his head against her shoulder now.

The sound of his voice mirrored the crippling fear that shot through her from his statement. Those words shook her to her very core. She felt it too, but hearing it come from Steve scared her even more. He was resilient and never gave up on anything he ever did, but hearing that come from him she almost felt that maybe he knew something he wasn't telling her. Is that the real reason why he was afraid to face her? Had he already given up hope? She suddenly began to resent those words. Why would he say such a thing to her?

"Steve," she leaned back as he lifted his head, "Is there something you're not telling me?"

He shook his head, wiping his face on his shoulder, confused, "No."

She wasn't sure she believed him, "Then why would you say that?"

He stared at her, not understanding her question. His son was missing yet he wasn't supposed to be afraid for him. "What am I supposed to feel, Kari?"

"Hope, don't give up," she said firmly. If he were giving up then there would be no hope for JD. She couldn't let that happen.

He felt the air leave his body. He couldn't breath. Did she actually think he'd given up on JD? That hurt almost as bad as the situation they were in. He carefully rolled Casey off his chest, laying her on the bed undisturbed. "I can't believe you just said that to me." He sat on the edge of the bed with his back to her, feeling stunned and betrayed. "I can't believe you said that!"

"Steve," she reached out grabbing his arm, "I don't understand why you came home then. Please, tell me if there's something I should know about JD."

He yanked his arm away from her grasp, standing up. "I came home to be with my family," he said angrily, raising his voice, "I came home to find a little stability in this fucked up situation. I thought maybe, just maybe, that my wife could provide that for me." He backed away from the bed, "Instead she accuses me of not caring enough! To hell with you Kari!" He stormed out of the room, slamming the door against the wall as he left, waking up Casey with a jolt, scaring her.

She picked up the crying baby and followed him down the stairs, barely glancing at Maggie as she came out of their bedroom, stunned by the yelling.

He stood in the kitchen putting his gun belt back on, glancing up at her just long enough to tell her to back off.

She stood at the bottom of the steps, "I didn't say that you didn't care about JD!"

"You didn't have to say it directly for me to hear it!" he yelled. "I'm sorry if I failed you and JD today Kari!"

Maggie came down the steps, taking Casey from her. She took two steps back up, in shock over the things they were saying to each other; never even hearing them fight before.

"Where are you going?" Kari asked as he walked past her toward the front door. "Steve, this isn't your fault."

"No it's not!" he yelled, standing in the open doorway, pointing at her, "Why was JD even in that car? Where the hell were you?" He regretted it almost as fast as it took to say it, but it was too late to take back. He just wanted to make her hurt as much as she had hurt him.

She glared at him with so much anger that he thought for sure he was going to hear the words, 'I hate you!' He slammed the door closed behind him, hearing the glass vase hit it that had been sitting on the table next to Kari.


	6. Chapter 6

The back of Steve's truck fishtailed in the dirt, almost hitting Kari's car as he slammed his foot on the gas, backing out of the driveway. He ran over the curb, throwing it in drive, pressing his foot hard on the accelerator. He couldn't get away from the house fast enough. He swerved out of the way of a turning car as he blew through the same stop sign that he passed everyday leaving his house. He turned the corner in the opposite direction, slamming on the brakes, watching the other driver continue on their way in his rearview mirror, the sound of their horn still echoing in his head. He slammed the palm of his hand against the steering wheel over and over, growling in frustration over his confrontation with Kari; angry at her for accusing him of not caring for his son and angry with himself for inflicting the same pain on her.

He grabbed the sterling wheel with both hands, laying his forehead against it, hearing the seatbelt alarm in the background going off every few seconds, alerting him that he wasn't wearing his. He'd never yelled at her like that before, but he'd also never been that angry with her. The things she accused him of where beyond hurtful, especially coming for her. He knew she was upset and probably wasn't thinking rationally, but she was the last person in the world he thought would turn on him. He wasn't even sure if he could ever forgive her for what she said. That scared him the most.

* * *

Kari sat down on the bottom step, putting her hands over face, sobbing. She tried to play the argument over in her head, but it was all so confusing. The things they said to each other, the way he accused her of putting JD in that car, making it sound as if it were her fault. She had been obsessing over that thought all day but never believing for a second that he would see it that way too and worse yet, point it out to her in detail. She felt Maggie's hand on her back, trying to calm her and could hear Casey crying. What was happening to them? Her perfect world was crumbling before her eyes and there was nothing she could do to stop it. She felt the baby kick and gasped from the pain of it. Her whole body shook over the thought of loosing not only her son but her husband too. He'd never looked at her that way or spoken with such anger toward her. She didn't understand where it had all gone wrong. One second they were holding each other on the bed and the next she was throwing something at his head. She would never consider the thought that he didn't care for JD. He twisted her words around. She felt another sharp kick and put her hand over the spot, rubbing away the discomfort. The thought of losing JD was bad enough, but if she lost Steve too she didn't know how she could go on.

* * *

Steve walked through the doors of Five O headquarters to silence. He knew if he went back to Lenny Timmons apartment that Danny would pitch a fit and he didn't want to waste any precious time arguing with him. He decided to start investigating Caldwell and to dig into Timmons life on his own.

He went straight to the computer table and entered their names. He looked up to see Connor Jeffries enter and walk down the corridor towards him.

"Hey, Steve," he said somberly, "I saw you come in and thought I'd come up and let you in on what we have so far."

He leaned on the table with both hands, nodding to him, "Thanks, what do you got?"

"Lenny Timmons lived in that apartment with his brother Bryce. We didn't find any criminal record for Bryce, nor can we locate him. The neighbors said they haven't seen either one for a couple of weeks at least. The apartment manager said they are paid up to the end of the month but gave no notice that they were moving out."

"What about jobs?" Steve asked.

"Nothing on file under Social Security, unless they were being paid under the table somewhere."

Steve stared down at Lenny's mug shot on the computer table, thinking out loud. "Construction would be an easy job to get paid under the table at. Especially if the company was in financial distress and couldn't pay the payroll taxes for its employees." He looked up at Connor, "Can you get me the last five years financials for a Caldwell Construction here on Oahu?"

Connor shrugged, "Sure whatever you need. It might take me a couple of hours." Connor turned and started jogging toward the door, "I'll let you know as soon as I get it."

"Hey!" Steve yelled out to him, "Thanks."

"Anything I can do to get JD home. He's an amazing little guy." He slammed through the doors, disappearing around the corner.

"Yes he is," Steve sighed. He stared down at Lenny's picture on the table, "Why?" he said to himself, "Why JD?" There had been no ransom call, no contact from them whatsoever. He pulled up his rap sheet, relieved to see nothing in the form of child molestation, although the attempted rape didn't sit well with him. He hoped he could put that to rest. If anything along those lines happened to JD, he was sure he would execute the man on spot. He brought up the latest arrest record and scanned through it trying to make a connection between he and Timmons. The arrest was made before he had even moved back to the islands and formed Five O. There was no connection between them. Why would JD be a target? He thought of Kari and pulled up the arrest file from the night that they found her handcuffed to the bed. The first night he had ever laid eyes on her. That frail little thing that was so frightened of him and eventually turned out to be the one that could make his heart stop with just a glance.

He closed his eyes, bending his head, recalling the brutal things he said to her when he walked out. He was in love with her even more now than he was five years ago. She was caring his baby and he had said those vicious things to her anyway. "Oh god," he moaned, "what's the matter with you?" He forgot about how mad he was at her earlier. Time had settled his anger, leaving him with just his faults not hers, being in love did that to you, and he was well aware of that fact.

* * *

Kari braced her hand on the wall taking in deep breaths feeling the sharp pain hit her again. The baby had never been this active, as if it was telling her to calm down from the inside. The emotional turmoil of JD along with the physical strain of being pregnant and now the fight with Steve had taken its toll on her. Maggie came hurriedly down the stairs after putting Casey back in her crib.

"Kari, sit down!" she ordered.

"Maggie!" she gasped, "What would I do without Steve?"

The old woman came around in front of her, clutching her by the shoulders, "You listen to me! You are not going to lose either one of those boys. Do you hear me? Steve loves you more than life itself. You had a fight that was all!"

"He was so angry. We've never said things like that before."

"Welcome to marriage Kari. Your six-year honeymoon is officially over."

"What," she said gripping her arm, not understanding the phrase?

Maggie forced her back down on the step, "It means you've settled into your marriage Kari. Just because you had a fight doesn't mean either one of you is going to run off to the lawyer. A good fight can make a marriage stronger."

"He blames me for JD."

"Sometimes people say things when their angry, things they would never say. I can almost bet that he's somewhere right now, kicking himself."

She leaned her head against Maggie's shoulder as she wrapped an arm around her, "I just want to wake up from this nightmare."

"You will honey, we all will."

* * *

Bryce put a box on the chair and hoisted JD up on it, pushing him up to the table. The McDonald's food in front of him looked like a delicacy. He grabbed the pop first, taking several long sucks from the straw, finishing half of it.

Bryce reached over, pulling it down, "Hey, slow down, you won't have any left for your food." He was trying his best to keep him calm. He couldn't keep him locked up and tied to the bed like Lenny suggested. It probably would have been the smartest thing, but he couldn't do it. He remembered being locked in the basement when he was little and how terrifying it was. Lenny didn't have the conscience that he did. He couldn't sit in one room, knowing this little kid was in the other feeling that fear. He just couldn't do it; besides, he was only five. What harm could he do?

He set his pop back down looking at the chicken nuggets and fries, his mouth-watering. "Can I eat this?" He asked not sure if it was his. He didn't want to accidentally eat Lenny's and have him mad at him again. He didn't like either one of them, but if he had to choose between the two men to be in the same room with, he chose Bryce.

"Of course. I got it for you. Do you like chicken McNuggets?"

JD picked one up, shoving the whole thing in his mouth, "Yes," he said while chewing.

Bryce pulled out some ketchup from the bag, opening a packet and squirting it in the box that held JD's food. "I figured you did. Do those pants I got you fit ok?"

JD looked at him. The pants he gave him were too big, but he didn't want to tell him that and make him mad. "Yes." He glanced around the room for Lenny, hoping he had gone someplace else. "Can I go home after I eat?"

"No," Bryce replied firmly, "You have to spend the night."

JD suddenly lost his appetite, "Can I call my Mom and Dad?"

"No," he said angrily, becoming irritated at his line of questions, not liking the guilty feeling it was causing him.

JD heard Lenny's tone of voice from him and froze, staring down at his food, tears welling in his eyes at the thought of having to spend the night there.

Bryce knew he had scared him and quickly tried to remedy the situation. He reached over picking up the toy that came with the meal. "Hey, look at this. It's pretty cool." He tore the plastic wrap off, setting the toy windup car in front of him.

JD raised his eyes but not his head, looking at it. He pulled up on the collar of his shirt, wiping his eyes and runny nose.

Bryce turned the tiny handle, winding up the toy and let it go. It slammed into JD's food, turned and disappeared inside the empty fries bag, dragging it across the table.

They both laughed at the bag that looked like it was moving on its own.

He took it and handed it to JD, "Here," He watched him turn the tiny handle with eaves with his small fingers. "When I was little we used to get fake tattoos in Happy Meals. Those were so cool."

JD let the car go watching it hit the bag but miss the opening. "My Dad has a tattoo on his arm."

"Oh yeah? What does it look like?"

JD shrugged his shoulders.

"Does it look like this?" He raised his sleeve, proudly displaying a barbwire tattoo wrapped around his bicep.

JD shook his head, "No, it's bigger and on both arms. He got it when he was a Navy person."

"Your Dad was in the Navy on a big ship?"

JD shrugged, "He doesn't like to talk about it to me, but my Uncle Danny told me that he was super, super smart and they called him a seal," he looked up at Bryce, "but not the kind that swims in the ocean."

Bryce stared at him, "Your Dad was a Navy Seal?"

JD nodded, winding the car up again.

He threw the remainder of his hamburger on the table. "Great! That's just great! Does he live with you or does he live somewhere else?" Hoping he said someplace far away.

JD looked at him peculiarly, "Of course he lives with us. Where else would he live?" He couldn't imagine his Dad not living in the same house as him and Casey and his Mom. He knew Danny and Gracie didn't live together but didn't understand why. His Dad tried to explain it to him once, but he still didn't get it.

Bryce felt a chill run down his spine. Not only did they grab the wrong kid, and a cop's kid, but also they took an ex-Navy Seal's fucking kid. '_Jesus Christ_,' he thought, '_could this plan get anymore fucked up_?'

Lenny walked in the room and over to the table. JD grabbed the toy, holding it in his lap, keeping his head down afraid to look at him. Lenny grabbed the bag of McDonalds and took out a burger, unwrapping it and taking a bite. He glared at Bryce, talking with his mouth full, "Well isn't this a nice, cozy family dinner."

"What?" Bryce said sarcastically.

"You aren't getting soft on me are ya?"

"Fuck you." Bryce fired back, picking his burger back up, deciding not to tell him about the Navy Seal old man.

Lenny looked down on JD, not seeing the little boy that Bryce did but half a million dollars that they were going to get for him. The call earlier to the Caldwell's had gone smoothly, but they insisted they needed time to get the money together. Bryce gave them 24 hours.

* * *

Steve looked up seeing Danny come in through the office doors.

"Hey! I thought I told you to go home."

"I did," Steve said grimly, "but it didn't work out too well."

Danny didn't see the renewed look of determination he was hoping for. He sent him home to be with Kari knowing that she of all people could settle him down. He had never met another couple before that got along as well as those two. They fed off each other, but in the best possible way. He literally had never heard Steve say a negative thing about her; joking wise of course, but never in a serious way. "What happened?"

"Nothing," He felt that tug on his heart, wanting to reach out to her, but deciding to just let it be for now. He turned all his focus back on JD, which was the right thing to do at the moment. "I've been going over Timmons arrest file, trying to find a link to me or Kari or some reason why he would take JD. I was just about to…"

"No need," Danny interrupted. He held up his hand with a piece of paper in it, "we found a notepad with info on Caldwell's car make, license plate number and Bobby Caldwell's name and age."

Steve stared at him, "Bobby?" All at once it hit him, "Holy shit! They took the wrong kid!"

Danny pointed at him, "Bingo! Bobby was in the front seat."

"On the floor," Steve finished his thought, "picking up his toy, out of sight."

Danny walked over to the table and noticed Caldwell's name and driver's license on the computer. "JD was in the backseat where Bobby should have been." His phone buzzed and he set it on the table, pushing speaker, "Kono, did you get it?"

"I just sent it. I'll be up there in two seconds."

Danny pulled up the file from Kono's email as it appeared on the screen. "There you go!" He pointed to a spreadsheet with a list of cashed checks from Caldwell's account. Bryce and Lenny Timmons each received four checks per month for the last year from Caldwell's personal account, the last two checks significantly larger than the others. "Looks like he was trying to buy them off for some reason. Maybe they wanted more money so hashed a plan to take the kid to get it."

Kono came running through the doors, "Chin's on his way up with Caldwell's phone records."

"I just sent Conner to get those financials for me. How did you get them so quick?" Steve asked amazed by her talent.

She shrugged, "I woke the Governor up. He woke up one of his flunky's." She gently smacked him in the gut as she came up next to him, "it's who you know?" She glanced down at the table seeing the info they had expected, "I knew it! That's the link!" she looked at Steve, "They took JD by mistake. Idiots!"

Chin pushed through the doors, stopping and waving to them, "Let's go! Caldwell's home received a call two hours ago from a burner phone. Coincidence? I think not."

Steve ran behind Danny and Kono down the corridor, "If that son of bitch got a ransom call and didn't contact us, I'm going to break his neck."


	7. Chapter 7

The Camaro pulled out of the parking lot of HPD, headed toward the Caldwell residence.

"That prick lied to me!" Danny grumbled, knowing that being lied too was apart of being a cop; everyone lied to the police, but it still pissed him off, especially this lie. "I asked that piece of shit point-blank if he had ever heard of Lenny or Bryce Timmons and he told me no!" he pursed his lips and made a fist, wanting to hit something but held back, growling loudly instead.

Steve felt the same anger, but contained himself until they got there. He held his cell phone in his lap, staring down at the number of his home phone he had entered. All he had to do was push call. He needed to tell Kari what was going on but their last heated conversation was still fresh. He wasn't sure he could re-hash the argument or hear an icy tone of voice coming from her. She threw a vase at his head. He was glad he saw it coming and closed the door just in time, but nonetheless. He knew she could be feisty at times, which was a quality he actually loved about her. She wasn't a push over, but he'd never seen her loose her temper like that before, and having it aimed at him was even more shocking, but considering what he had said to her, he didn't blame her anymore.

Danny glanced over at him, staring down at his phone. "What's the hesitation? You need to let her know what's going on."

"I know. I know," Steve agreed, pushing the button and turning his head toward the window, closing his eyes and hoping for a civil conversation.

Kari rolled over, answering the phone on Steve's side of the bed. She looked at the caller ID, seeing his cell number displayed. "Hello," she said quietly, sitting up, not sure what tone the conversation was going to have.

"Hey," he said in the same manner, "I just wanted to let you know that we found a link between the Caldwell's and the people who took JD. It was actually a mistake. We're pretty sure they meant to take Bobby Caldwell instead of JD."

She put her hand over her heart, "What? Do you know where he is?"

"Not yet, but we have a good lead. It was just a bad case of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. We're headed over to the Caldwell's now." He thought about what he had said earlier to her, looking over at Danny in the car, wishing he were alone so he could say what he really wanted to, but she beat him to it.

She could tell by the tone of his voice that he felt the same way about the fight as she did. She didn't want this conflict distracting him from what was truly important at the moment. "Steve," she felt herself beginning to choke up, "I didn't mean…"

"I know," he interrupted, hearing the regret in her voice also, "me too." He glanced over at Danny again who tried to pretend like he wasn't paying attention to the conversation but it was impossible not to.

She felt a wave of relief sweep over her. It was done and forgotten, just like Maggie said it would be, "I love you."

"I love you too. I'll call you and let you know what we find out."

She hung up looking at the digital clock that read 1:14 am. She hoped by morning her son would be home. She knew sleep was never going to come now and didn't want to take anymore of Malia's medication she had left. She laid back down, hugging Steve's pillow, putting her trust in him, which was what allowed the calm to settle over her.

Steve let out a deep sigh, relieved that all was forgiven. It made him feel energized not having that weight on his shoulders.

"Everything ok?" Danny asked glancing over at him and then back at the road.

"Yea, it is now. The tension is playing havoc on both of us."

Danny understood that, pleased they had worked it out. He didn't need his head filled with garbage from a fight with Kari.

* * *

They pulled up in front of Caldwell's house. Steve leaned over looking at the two-story Mediterranean style home that was on the borderline of being called a mansion.

Danny whistled, "Nice pad. Looks like it would cost a lot to keep up, it could be a burden" he glanced over at Steve, "especially in a bad economy that hit construction companies the worst."

Steve held the same stern look, not responding as he got out. Chin and Kono walked up to the car from behind. He wasted no time with discussing a plan and just made his way to the front door; glad that they didn't have a security gate.

"Hey," Danny said following him up the paved driveway, "remember, they have a kid."

Steve stopped and turned to him, "Yeah, well I got a kid too!"

Danny looked over at Chin and Kono, all three acknowledged in agreement, "Good point. Carry on."

Steve walked up to the fifteen-foot solid pine door and rang the bell. He waited three seconds and then pounded on it, ringing it again. He did this two more times before a light went on behind the door. He took a step back and put his hand on his gun when he heard the locks being removed. The door opened with Robert Caldwell standing before them wearing the same pair of pants and dress shirt from earlier that day, although both were disheveled.

"What the hell is going on!" he said angrily.

Who is it Robert?"

He looked over his shoulder as his wife appeared at the bottom of the steps, fastening her robe.

"Go back to bed," he ordered, focusing back on the four people standing at his door, mainly Steve who stared at him as if he might lunge at him any second.

"You're up awfully late," Danny said, stepping in front of Steve, "burning the midnight oil? Or maybe you're just trying to come up with a reason why you felt it necessary to lie to me when I asked if you knew Lenny and Bryce Timmons."

His attitude suddenly changed to defeat, "I didn't know what to do."

Danny put his hand on his chest, pushing him backwards into the house, "Well we're going to help you with that right now." He stood right in his face, "You open up that big mouth of yours and start telling us what we want or I'm going to let JD's Dad here question you down at the station in our own private interrogation room."

Robert held his hands up in defense, "They used to work for me. I paid them under the table. That's it!"

"Robert," Natalie scolded him, "tell them!"

"Shut up!" he screamed back, "Go back to bed!"

She came down the last step, "You tell them or I will!"

Steve pushed past Danny, grabbing Robert by the throat with his hand, "I'm tired of fucking around with you! You tell me what you're hiding, right now!"

He breathed quick short gasps of air as his face turned bright red, "Ok," he wheezed. "They called here, wanting more money."

Steve let him go and Robert bent over, trying to catch his breath.

"More money for what? JD?" Steve yelled, bending over to him as he continued to recover.

He stood back up, putting his hands over his throat, "No. Yes, for both things. They knew I was struggling and paying people off under the table, but they also found out that I wasn't building to code and was cutting corners to save money. They tried to force my hand by asking for a payoff. I gave them each $5,000. They wanted more, but I thought they would settle for that and move on."

Danny stepped forward, "So they planned a scheme to take your kid as a way to force your hand again?"

"Yes, I suppose." He looked at Steve, "It was supposed to be Bobby."

"Why didn't you tell us they called?" Chin confronted.

"They said if I told you," he looked at Steve, "they must know you're a cop. He said that if I contacted you, that they would kill JD." He shook his head, adding one more lie on top of the other, "I told them I needed time. I was going to get the money together myself and pay them off and get him back. I was afraid to tell you!" he pulled out all the stops trying to convince them. "I didn't want anything to happen to JD."

"How long did they give you?"

"I told them I needed two days. I said that I needed to get the money from different accounts." He looked in Steve's eyes hoping he was buying it, trying to muster up the most pathetic and distraught expression he could. He was getting the money together all right, but he had no plans on giving it Lenny or Bryce Timmons. He figured if they wanted $500,000 now that they would be back eventually for more; not that he even had $500,000. The body in the concrete wasn't going anywhere and he had no way of digging it up without loosing six months worth of work and tens of thousands in costs, plus trying to explain the destruction to the client was impossible. The owner of the building was ex-mob out of Las Vegas, who decided to dabble in condos. When Robert went into business with him, he had no clue it would include disposing of dead bodies for the man. He figured either way was a no win situation. Bryce and Lenny would break him or his client would break his legs, if he were lucky. He made the decision to just get all the liquid assets he could in twenty-four hours and make a break out of the country, leaving everything behind, including his wife and kid. He had planned on leaving her anyway. This way there was no alimony and child support to deal with.

"Two days?" Steve said, looking at him in disbelief, "they actually gave you two days to get the money together?"

Robert looked from his intimidating stare to Danny, "Yes, why?"

"That just seems a long time."

"They aren't the brightest guys in the world. Neither one has an education past the ninth grade."

"When are you going to make the drop?"

"They said they would call back on Thursday at three in the afternoon. That's when they would tell me where to leave the money."

"And what about JD?" Steve bellowed, "You think they're just going to walk up to you and hand him over after they already have the money?"

"They said they would leave him someplace that I could easily find him."

Steve clenched his fists, walking away from him because he was on the verge of punching him.

Danny got right in his face, "It doesn't work that way! It never works that way! If you give them that money, chances are we will never see JD again."

Robert pretended to be shocked and disturbed from that piece of information. He knew Lenny and Bryce were punks, but he never saw them as killers. Even now standing here, hearing it first hand from the Police what the reality was, he still didn't believe they would harm the kid; at least that's what he told himself to clear his conscience.

"What do I do now?" Robert sighed.

"You don't do anything!" Steve said angrily, "You let us take over," he pointed at him in a threatening manner, "and you do exactly as we tell you!"

Robert nodded, "Ok."

"We need to get a tap on his home phone." Chin said, taking out his cell, calling the proper authorities to do just that.

Robert said nothing about the fact that Bryce had told him he was going to call him back on his cell phone, and he should be mobile and ready for the exchange. The call was going to be the next day, not the day after as he had told them. He figured by then he'd have the cash and be on his way, hopefully somewhere very far away before they figured it out.

Steve, Danny and Kono stood off to the side as Robert sat on the edge of his couch with his head in hands, seemingly upset over the situation. Steve eyed him suspiciously. "I don't like him. I still think he's hiding something. I want a tail on him."

"I'll do it," Kono volunteered, staring him down herself.

"No," Steve argued. "He knows you. I'll get Connor to do it." He walked over to Chin, whispering to him, "I want a trace on every phone in his name, not just his house."

Chin nodded, walking outside so he could relay the message privately.

Natalie came up to them, but focused on Steve, "I'm so sorry. I don't know what to say to you." She bent her head ashamed to face him, "I told him he should call you. I begged him, but he told me, he convinced me we were doing the right…" she trailed off, wiping her eyes as looked back up at him, "I'm so sorry."

Kono spoke up when no one else did, "You should have called! This isn't some game you're playing between money and thieves. These people kidnapped a little boy, our little boy," she motioned between the three of them, "if anything happens to him it will be on your hands!"

"Kono!" Steve scolded her for being a little too harsh, knowing Natalie was probably sick over it and more frightened of her husband than them.

"No," she defended her actions, "she needs to know she broke the law and she needs to realize that there comes a time when you have to stand up and do what's right, regardless of what the consequences are!"

Natalie stared at her, taking her punishment. "You're right," she swallowed hard, fighting back the tears, "You're absolutely right." She glanced over at Robert, "I should have called you myself." She knew somewhere among all this chaos they must have broken the law. "Are we under arrest?"

They all turned to Steve for the final decision on that.

He didn't have the time to book them and do the paperwork, "No, but don't betray me again," he said, leaving no room for doubt that the next time he would.

She nodded and backed away from them, taking a seat on the couch by her husband.

Robert looked up at them, "What can I do? They're asking for $500,000."

"Don't do anything. We'll set it up and take them down at the exchange. Like Danny said; if we pay them a dime we may never see my son again."

Those words alone sent a cold chill down Steve's spine. Even though he had a lead on JD, a pretty good lead, he wasn't about to sit around and wait for a phone call supposedly coming in two days. He couldn't shake the idea that Robert Caldwell was hiding something no matter how sincere and cooperative he was being. The idea of JD being in the custody of those two men for another two days and being in the middle of the set up and exchange was just not acceptable to him. He needed to find him before the phone call. The cold chill down his spine turned into a heated anger that was focused on Lenny and Bryce Timmons, god help them both if he got a hold of them before anyone could stop him.


	8. Chapter 8

Kari ran to the phone on the desk hoping it was Steve saying he had JD. She hadn't heard from him again since the call telling her they were headed to the Caldwell's. The morning sun was up and Maggie already had a pot of coffee brewing and breakfast almost finished for her.

She didn't recognize the number on the caller ID.

"Steve!" she answered hopeful.

"No," Natalie replied regretfully. "It's Natalie. Natalie Caldwell." She hesitated wondering if she would hang up on her, assuming she knew of the deceit. When she didn't hear a click she continued on, "I just wanted to call and say how sorry I am about everything Kari, and if there is anything I can do for you, please, please let me know."

Kari ran her hand over her hair and sat down in the leather chair by the desk. She could hear the troubled tone of Natalie's voice and actually felt sorry for her. "I don't blame you Natalie. I know if you could have prevented it, you would have."

"I feel just awful about all of this." She sniffed into the phone, dabbing her bloodshot eyes with a tissue.

"I have the utmost confidence in my husband." Kari told her, "He'll find JD."

"If they decide to pay the ransom after all, we will get you the money. I'll do whatever is necessary."

Kari shook her head, confused, "What do you mean?"

"The people who took JD. They called and want $500,000. We were getting the money together when they decided that we shouldn't pay because it would be too risky."

"They?" she questioned, not believing that Steve would even hesitate giving them the money. They had close to five million dollars still in the Ally House foundation account alone. He could give them $500,000 plus more to get their son back.

"Steve and his team," Natalie said, "they were here last night and told us not to pay them anything and that they would handle it. I know we should have called them right away. If you need the money, please let us help," she begged.

Kari was stunned, why would he deny paying the ransom! It was absurd, especially since he knew very well they had that amount they were asking for ten times over. She didn't understand his logic. She could hear Natalie talking but her mind was consumed with Steve's denial to pay them off. She hung up the phone on Natalie and grabbed the car keys off the table as she went for the door.

"Where are you going?" Maggie asked her, holding a spatula in her hand watching her slam the door on her way out.

* * *

Kari pushed through the doors of Five O headquarters.

Chin looked up from his desk seeing her fast pace down the corridor.

She burst into Steve's office, surprising he and Danny who were going over Caldwell's expenses.

"Why won't you pay the ransom to get JD back?" She blurted out, clutching her chest with both hands, "I don't understand. We have the money. Why not just pay it?"

Danny stepped away from Steve as he pushed back in his chair and stood up. "We can't pay it Kari."

"Yes we can!" The tone of her voice becoming shaky, "just pay it and let's get him back!"

"You don't understand honey," he came around, standing in front of her, gently putting his hands on her arms, "if we pay it we may never get him back."

"They just want the money! So give it to them!"

"It doesn't work that way," he tried to explain, wondering who had told her of the ransom to begin with. "If we give it to them, then who's to say they will not just take it and run. Why would they show themselves again and risk getting caught."

"You don't know that. They took the wrong child, they…" she ranted on when Steve cut her off.

"Yes we do know that! Statistics tells us…"

Statistics!" she yelled, raising her arms breaking the hold he had on her, "you're going to stand there and quote statics too me like this is some random case?"

"Kari," Steve said, trying to retain his anger and get her under control, seeing that panic in her eyes that he saw so many times from family members in the same situation, "calm down. You know…"

"Don't tell me to calm down!" She stepped back away from him, "I think you're too calm, and I think I have some say in this. He's my son too! If they want the money then give it to them!" her voice becoming hysterical, "You need to be thinking like a father now, not just a police officer!"

"Kari!" Danny snapped, "That's enough!"

Steve leaned back against his desk, staring at her, hearing that same accusation from the day before. He was exhausted from lack of sleep and from the emotional strain this entire ordeal was putting on him. He couldn't go through this with her again. "Go home Kari," he said calmly.

"I want to give them the money!" she said, biting her bottom lip, tears filling her eyes. "I want to pay it!" she said stubbornly.

Steve gritted his teeth, pushing off his desk. He'd had enough, "I don't give a shit what you want right now! You're going to go home and let me handle this! You're telling me to act like a father?" he snarled, motioning to her, "what kind of mother comes down to the police station interrupting her son's kidnapping investigation to tell the police how to do their job!" he voice echoed down the halls, so much so Chin came out of his office.

"Hey!" Danny yelled the loudest, getting in between the two of them, "Stop! Right now!" He turned to Steve, raising his hands for him to be civil, speaking so only he could hear, "You need to see her as a victim not your wife. She's scared, she's pregnant and most of all, she's really, really scared."

He then turned to Kari, taking her by the arm and leading her out of his office, "Go home Kari. You shouldn't have come down here."

She turned to him, "Danny, you've been a police officer longer than Steve has, please try to explain to him that we should pay."

He shook his head, "No. I'm not going to get into this with you Kari."

"You're as stubborn as he is."

Danny gripped her arm tighter, "Listen to me! Do you have any idea what he's going through?"

"Yes!" she replied, like it was stupid question.

It was exactly what he wanted her to say. "Good! Then you know he is doing everything he can to bring JD home safely. The same as you." He let go of her arm, calming himself, "I know you're scared Kari. The longer JD's away the more frightened you become, I get that. But paying these guys off is not the solution. Even if they give JD back, they could get away. Our plan is a sure way to trap them all around and bring him home safely."

She stood face to face with him, "Is it 100%?"

Danny thought that question was so unfair.

"Is it?" she asked again.

"Go home Kari." He turned away from her and went into Steve's office, closing the glass door behind him.

She looked at Steve through the window. He stared back at her over Danny's shoulder as he walked toward him. His expression was different from the last confrontation they had, he didn't look angry but more disappointed. She wasn't sure she should have come. She turned away from him walking slowly to the exit. She didn't even notice Chin until she felt a hand on her arm.

"It's going to be ok," he said, reassuring her.

She nodded, dropping her head, "I keep telling myself that, but it's getting harder and harder to believe the longer he's gone. I just feel so desperate."

"Let me take you home," he offered.

"No," she touched his hand that was on her arm, "I'm ok." She continued down the corridor and out the door.

* * *

Kari sat in her car on the street where JD had been taken. She could still see remnants of the police activity. There were red paint marks on the ground indicating the spot where the glass from the back window had been. Tire tracks were circled in white paint, and a couple of other places marked that she didn't know the significance of.

She rested her elbow on the window and laid her head in her hand, trying to sort through her thoughts but every time she tried, the image of JD came flooding back. She was lost in her world and felt she had no one to turn to. She had no one to talk to about what was happening. She was so confused about the ransom money. In a normal situation she would have believed everything Steve and Danny said about this case and not argued their decisions, but it wasn't a normal situation and it wasn't just any case. She felt in her heart it was the right thing to do and couldn't understand why they would see it differently. She thought about what Danny had said about the kidnappers getting away, she could careless as long as JD was home. In her mind her son was worth losing the $500,000 or even the whole five million, just to get him home. '_Let them take the money and go_,' she thought.

She heard a gentle tap on the window and looked up, seeing Natalie Caldwell standing outside her car window. She hadn't even realized how hard she had been crying until she saw an equally devastated look on Natalie's face.

Natalie opened her car door, "Kari." She reached in and hugged her.

Kari held onto her, knowing she would understand because she was a mother too, and it could have very easily been her son.

Natalie reached over and undid her seat belt. "Come on. Let me take you home."

"No," Kari," sniffed, "I don't want to go home. It's hard being there."

"Ok," she said, sympathetically, "let's go to my house. We can have a cup of coffee and…just talk." She didn't know what she would say to her but she couldn't leave her in that condition.

She came out of the car and walked with her over to her Lexus sedan. Natalie opened the door for her and then went back to her car, taking the keys and her purse out.

They drove in silence to her house and Natalie pulled into the garage closing it behind her. They came inside and went through the house and out to the garden where it was peaceful and quiet.

"I'm going to make some coffee. I'll be right back."

Kari nodded her appreciation and looked around at the beautiful Hawaiian garden displayed before her. She turned around and got a first hand look at the size of the house, not noticing it as they drove in. Her eyes focused on the man in the upstairs window looking down on her. She had never met him before, but assumed it was Natalie's husband. He moved away almost instantly. She turned back around and focused on the flowers again.

Natalie set down a tray that had two cups of coffee and a variety of different creams, sugar packs and some cookies. "I didn't know what you liked in your coffee."

Kari smiled at her hospitality and the extra effort to please her. "Anything is good. Thank you." She poured a small amount of cream in her cup and took a small drink.

Natalie did the same and then reached over touching her hand, "Are you feeling better?" she thought that question stupid after asking it. "I mean…" she shook her head, feeling so sad for her, "I don't know what I mean. Honestly Kari, I don't know what to say."

Kari smiled at her, "It's ok, and actually this is very nice, thank you."

"I couldn't just leave you sitting there."

Kari sighed, "I don't know why I even went there. I should have known better. I had just come from the police station," she combed her hand through her hair, "I had a not so pleasant conversation with my husband."

"This must be so very hard on both of you."

"I just don't understand why he won't pay the ransom."

"We told him we could get the money for you," Natalie said.

Kari looked up at her, "We don't need to use your money. I inherited a great deal of money a few years ago. We can use that and offer them even more, but Steve won't do it! I just don't understand."

"He told us that there might be a chance that you wouldn't get…" she hesitated not wanting to say something morbid to her, "that it might hinder things by paying."

"But if all they want is the money, then I think we should give it to them. I have over five million dollars. I'd give them every penny."

Robert leaned in closer to the open window. That last statement sent his mind racing with a plan.


	9. Chapter 9

Connor answered the call coming in from Steve.

"Hey. Any activity going on over there?" he asked him.

Connor looked out the window of his car that was parked on the road above the Caldwell's house, giving him a bird's-eye view of the home. "No, not really. Mrs. just pulled in the garage from dropping the kid off at school. Mr. hasn't left so far. You sure you don't want me tagging her?"

"No," Steve ordered, "stick with him."

"You got it. I'll let you know if he leaves."

"Thanks, Connor."

Steve set his phone down on his desk.

"Why don't you catch some zzz's?"

He looked up at Danny standing in his office doorway. "I'm good."

"You look like ass," he affirmed truthfully. "Chin is taking thirty, and then I am. Right now you are too."

"How can I justify going to sleep?"

"You don't have to. I'm telling you its the right thing to do at the moment. We have this time we need to take advantage of it. Why do I have to stand here and tell you this? Didn't you tell me once that finding time to get a quick shuteye, even if it was ten minutes could make all the difference in the world on your frame of mind and thinking process?"

Steve pushed back from his desk, "Why is it that you can remember my quotes to use against me but you can't remember my order five minutes after you leave to get lunch? Even when you write it down you get it wrong."

Danny smiled as he left his office, "That's usually the time of day when I take my mental nap. There's nothing useful to remember." He closed the glass door on his way out. "I'll wake you in thirty, no later so take advantage of what you can."

Steve lay down on the couch; glad he had taken Chin's advice when furnishing the offices to get something soft and comfortable for these exact moments. He put his arm over his face, blocking out the light and trying to block out his fight with Kari. Danny was right, he had to view her as the mother of a victim. She didn't understand the elements that went into their strategy. He tried to take in Danny's reasoning of it, that she didn't mean it to be malicious but that she was just naïve to it. It reminded him of other parents who had said worse things than that to him, but nonetheless, it was still hard listening to Kari attack him on such a personal level.

He decided to let it go and focused on JD. He had last seen his son the morning before, sitting at the breakfast table eating cereal. A sharp stab hit him, remembering he was in too much of a hurry to have a real conversation with him. An event he would never forgo again.

His guilt was replaced with that undying fear of where he was and how he was being treated. He shook his head, pushing it away, focusing instead on a pleasant moment between the two of them. So many came to light, but he chose the one memory that he considered his proudest moment.

JD had been begging to go along on one of his morning ocean swims. He had always said no, because it was basically his exercise for the day and he needed to get the length and time in for a good workout. He came out one morning about a month earlier and JD was standing there in his board shorts with his towel already hanging on the hook. Steve couldn't figure out how he had got it up there, but assumed it was either Kari or Maggie helping him. He put his hands on his hips and looked down at his son's determined expression.

"I can keep up Dad. I promise," he said adamantly.

Steve couldn't resist the little clone standing before him, all hopeful and pleading, "Ok, let's go," he agreed, motioning toward the water. They went out about four steps before JD stopped and imitated him by stretching his arms over his head, getting loosened up. An occurrence he observed everyday. Steve smiled, giving him a minute.

"You ready?"

"Uh huh," he said, letting his body fall into the water, not knowing how to dive just yet. He dog paddled out a few feet and then began to imitate Steve's slow-moving strokes, but keeping his head above the water.

Steve's normal swim was about one mile out and back. Today he decided they would go to the park, which was about four houses down and then back. He was afraid that might even be too far, but he could always piggyback him the rest of the way, he thought. They started out and JD kept his promise of keeping up all the way to the park, even though Steve's speed was a fraction of what it normally was.

Once there, he insisted on going all the way to the end of the park and then back. "I can do it! I'm not even tired," he bragged as he treaded water.

"Ok, let's do it."

They did the length of the park and headed back toward the house. Steve followed about half his body length behind so he could keep an eye on him. They were about hallway home when JD began to show signs of wearing out. He stopped every couple of strokes and treaded water, catching his breath before continuing on. Steve never said a word and just waited him out, knowing he wasn't going to make it, they were too far away and it was obvious he was already exhausted. Still, he kept going.

Two houses down Steve stopped and stood up in the chest high water, "Why don't you hop on my back buddy and I'll give you ride the rest of the way."

JD stopped, trying desperately to keep his head above the water, "No," he breathed heavily, "I'm ok,", looking down the beach for their house.

"JD," Steve started to argue with him but it was too late, he had already begun to swim again. He couldn't help but smile at his effort of proving to him that he could keep up. "We don't have too much further." He encouraged, instead of offering a way out.

JD's strokes began to slow as he pushed his way through the water, stopping every couple of seconds to catch his breath and then would carry on. The last house Steve literally had his hands over him ready to catch him if he went under.

"Come on JD, we're almost there!" he said, urging him on.

He scrambled in the water trying to move his arms and legs that felt like lead, but he was determined to get there on his own.

Steve waited until they were directly in front of the house before he took him under the arms and lifted him out. "Nice job!" he said hoisting him up on his hip. "JD! You're the man!"

He didn't say anything but just nodded, as he lay limp on his shoulder, trying to catch his breath.

Steve grabbed the towel off the hook and wrapped it over him, sitting down in the yard chair.

JD curled up on his lap still breathing heavy. "I…told…you…I…could keep up."

"Yea you did buddy." Steve kissed him on the forehead, "You did really, really good. I'm so proud of you JD."

He lounged back in the chair and held his little man, watching him drift off to sleep.

Steve's arm slid off his face as he fell asleep on the couch, thinking of that moment.

* * *

Kari and Natalie both turned as Robert came out the door. He had sympathy oozing from every pore on his body. "Mrs. McGarrett," he said somberly, reaching his hand out to her, "I'm so sorry for what you are going through. I'm Robert Caldwell."

Natalie smiled at his kind gesture toward Kari, finding it surprising, but she did have to admit he had his moments.

Kari let him take her hand and he grasp it ever so gently, "Thank you. Please call me Kari."

"If there is anything we can do to help, you'll let us know?"

She smiled at him, "Thank you again." She looked back over at Natalie, "I should really be getting back. Maggie will be getting worried."

Natalie pushed her chair back, "I'm so glad you came over. Let me get your purse and I have something else for you. I'll be right back, it's upstairs." She went in the house leaving them alone.

Kari stood up and went to leave when Robert's statement made her stop in her tracks.

"I think they should pay them off. The ransom I mean." As she turned to him, he took complete advantage of the moment while he had the chance, "I told them I would set it up, but they refused. I didn't want to argue with your husband, but I know these two guys."

"You know them?" Kari asked, shocked by his announcement.

"Yes, they used to work for me." He looked at her surprised, "Didn't your husband tell you that?"

"No, no he didn't."

"They worked for me for over a year." He walked over to her, "I don't know if anyone told you this, but they were trying to extort money from me while my business was about to go bankrupt. I was trying to cut some corners," He sighed, "I'm not proud of what I did, but I didn't want my family to go without." He narrowed his eye, "All they want is money; the greedy little bastards! They'll stop at nothing to get it, even take a little boy." He quickly took her by the arm, "I'm sorry! I shouldn't have said that. If it's any help, I really don't think they will hurt your son. All they want is the money, that's all."

"That's what I think too," Kari sighed, finally having someone see it from her side. She wished Steve would. She trusted him always, but this one time it was so hard. There was just too much at stake and the fact that he wouldn't even consider it or tell her why. JD was her son too and she deserved to know what was going on. If all they wanted was the money then why would they harm him, it didn't make sense. "You don't think they will hurt JD?" she asked, searching his eyes to see if he said that because it was true or because he was trying to appease her.

"Kari," he said with a slight smile, "these aren't violent boys. They've just got themselves mixed up in something over their head and over greed. They aren't very bright, but," he didn't want her to get too comfortable with the idea that they wouldn't, "they want money and people do things they normally wouldn't when it comes to money." He never considered himself in that category. "Who's to say what they will do if they feel double crossed or that they've been set up."

Kari leaned against the wall, "I just want it to be over and I want my son home." She looked up at him, "I know Steve does too, just as much I do, but he's a police officer. He not only wants his son home, but he wants the criminals caught and punished." She put her hand on her chest, "Me, I just want my son home. If they catch them great, but we should find the quickest route to get him home, whether they are caught or not, I just want him home. They can hunt them down after they let JD go."

Robert moved closer to her, "If you really believe that, I might be able to help you."

Kari looked up at him, "What do you mean?"

He looked down, "I feel responsible for this whole situation. You are an innocent victim and so is your son." He wiped the bottom of his mouth, pretending to be emotional, "I was trying to get the $500,000 together. I might be able to get more, but it could take some time, and the more we offer the better chance we have." He glanced up at her, "Money is the solution here."

"I have money," she declared, "I have enough to pay it all and I can get it quickly. But how do we contact them?"

"They have an untraceable phone number they left me. When I have the money together I'm supposed to text the number and they will text me back the place where I'm supposed to meet them. I have until this afternoon."

"Does Steve know all this?"

"Of course. I gave him the number last night." He lied, "but he told me not to contact them. They were going to wait and set up a double cross. Catch them in the act." He made a concerned face, "I'm not so sure how that will play out with these two, but I'm also not the one to make that call," he looked directly in her eyes, "after all, he's not my son."

Kari felt a kick in her stomach and put her hand over the spot, feeling her baby shift inside of her. She remembered the first time she ever felt that from JD and tears came to her eyes. She knew what she was thinking would go against Steve but she quickly pushed it away. Just the idea of getting JD home in the next few hours was all she could focus on, besides she thought, once he's home and Steve sees him, all will be forgotten. She looked up at Robert, "How would this work? If JD is even in the slightest bit of danger…"

"He won't be. We could offer them more; say $700,000 and then leave even more money someplace for them once we have JD back. That would ensure his safety and they get an extra $200,000 for their effort. We could even inform the police once we have JD back and they could meet them at the other money exchange. It's a win, win situation."

"I don't know," Kari shuttered, her mind racing, "I don't know. I should talk to Steve about this and then…"

Robert shook his head, "You're right, but he won't do it."

"He might." She said, wondering why he could pretend to know him better than she.

"This was my plan yesterday. That's why I didn't call the police right away. I figured I could get him back unharmed by just giving them the money." He held his palms up in defeat, "The police, your husband, they didn't like that idea because there was a chance they could get away. That's when he told me they would handle it."

"You really believe they'll just take the money and leave JD?"

He shrugged, "Yes, why wouldn't they?"

Robert moved away as Natalie came outside, "Robert, I don't think you should be discussing this with Kari. It makes her very upset." She heard just the last few seconds of the conversation. "Here Kari." She handed her a piece of paper. "This is for a day spa that I go to. When this is all over I want you to go there and just tell them to put it on my account."

Kari took the paper, "Thank you Natalie." She focused back on Robert, torn between her loyalty to Steve and the foolproof plan that he was offering to get JD back in the next couple of hours.

He put a hand on her shoulder, "I understand your hesitation. It was just an idea."

Kari felt the baby flutter again, "If it was your son Bobby in this situation instead of JD," she sighed, "what would you have done?"

Robert used the one emotion he knew would pull her in, fear. "Like I told you before Kari, I was already getting the money together to pay them because I knew that's all they wanted, money. My biggest concern was to get him home as soon as possible, because the longer this thing dragged on, the more things that can go wrong and they specifically told me not to contact the police."

She bit her bottom lip, closing her eyes; "I can have the money in less than an hour, all of it." She tried not to think about the consequences she would face with Steve and just concentrated on getting JD home.

Natalie looked at Robert, "What are you talking about?"

He glared at her, warning her to not to get involved. "Kari wants to pay them off and get her son home."

"Kari," she said shocked, "you should let your husband…"

"Natalie!" Robert warned her again, taking her abruptly by the arm and leading her into the house away from Kari. "This is her decision! If it was Bobby I would hope you would do the same."

"The police should handle this Robert. You heard Commander McGarrett last night, he said not to betray him again."

He leaned in to her, "She's fighting for her son," he looked her up and down callously, "I can see now that you would have left Bobby with those animals."

She gasp from the rabid tone of his voice and just the statement itself. He released the grip on her arm, warning her again with his eyes to stay out of it.

He went back outside, "Kari," he said gently; "you said you could get the money in the next hour? Tell me about that and we'll get JD home in the next two hours."

* * *

Danny leaned over Steve, shaking him on the shoulder, trying to wake him from the obvious nightmare he was experiencing. "Steve," he shouted, "wake up!"

Steve's eyes burst open and he bolted up on the couch, reaching out for something and taking in a deep breath as if he had been holding it.

"Hey, hey," Danny said calmly, "you were dreaming." He put his hand on his shoulder still seeing the panic in his eyes, "relax."

"Holy shit," he stuttered, dragging his hands down his sweaty face.

"We're going to find him today," he reassured him, assuming the dream was about JD, "we will!"

Steve swung his legs over so he was sitting on the couch. He didn't tell Danny, but the dream was about Kari. He took a deep breath, trying to shake off the terrifying feeling of loosing her all over again. He dreamt she was struggling in the water and then went under. He dove down but she was sinking faster than he could swim. She was drowning.

He hadn't had one of those nightmares in over five years and didn't understand why all of a sudden they were resurfacing. He attributed it to the stress of JD and not the fact that Kari was in any kind of danger. That notion was the last thing on his mind.


	10. Chapter 10

Robert snatched the keys from Natalie's hand. "I'll drive her back to her car."

"Robert please don't do this!"

He ignored the pleading and met Kari out in the garage. She was already in the car waiting for him.

He began to back out of the driveway and paused as Natalie came out. "Kari," she waved, but Robert continued down the driveway.

"She doesn't understand what you are feeling," he assured her.

Conner reached over pulling out his binoculars as Natalie stood in the middle of her driveway. He adjusted the focus and narrowed in on Robert in the driver's seat. He held them with one hand and just before he went to start the car he caught something out of the corner of his eye and looked back down at the BMW sedan again. "Holy shit!" he said bewildered, looking down at Kari McGarrett in the front seat with Robert Caldwell. "What the hell."

He tossed the binoculars on the seat and started the car.

Steve reached over his desk and picked up his ringing cell phone. He put it on speaker setting it down, "Connor, what do you got?"

"Steve," he said hesitantly, "Robert Caldwell's on the move."

"Ok, keep an eye on him."

"Well there's more," he said sheepishly.

Steve looked up at Danny, "What do mean?"

"Kari's in the car with him."

"What?" Danny blurted out, leaning down to the phone, "Kari McGarrett?"

"Yes. She must have been in the car with the Mrs. when she came home earlier. I didn't see her."

Steve sat back in his chair with his hands on his head, still in shock over what he was hearing. "What the hell is she doing?" he leaned over to the phone, "Where are you now?"

"Headed down…hold on," he said, pulling over to the curb, "we're at the crime scene where JD was taken. They're sitting in the car talking. Kari's SUV is parked here."

* * *

Robert handed Kari a cell phone, "You get the money together and I'll call you when I make contact."

"I want to talk to JD."

"I don't know if that will be possible," he tried to steer her away from that demand. He knew the second call would be coming in soon from Bryce Timmons telling him of the exchange. He had no intentions of telling him about the extra money. His plan was to have her deliver what she thought was the $700,000 minus his take and the extra he said he would stash someplace else. All in all he was pretty sure he could blow the island with close to a million. His first plan was to take it all, but then he wasn't sure he could ever get a dead kid off his conscience if the brother's retaliated from being set up. He figured he could live pretty well overseas with a million and decided not to get greedy.

"Then I want to see him before I give them the money. He needs to be there at the exchange. You tell them that!"

"I will," he reassured her.

She thought of what she just said and her thoughts instantly went to Steve. She tried again to tell herself she was doing the right thing, but knew deep down inside she was taking a risk. Her only justification was knowing she was going to get JD back very soon.

* * *

"She's going to her car. Who do you want me to follow?" Connor asked.

"Stick with Caldwell. I can track Kari on her cell," Steve ordered putting his phone on mute, "What the hell is she doing with Caldwell?"

Danny shrugged, "How am I supposed to know! I just hope she's not doing anything stupid."

Steve went to his office door, "Chin!" he yelled across the hall, "Get a lock on Kari's cell phone."

"Is everything ok?" he asked, standing at his desk.

"No! I need it quick!"

He ran his hand over his hair, trying to understand what she was doing over there. She must have gone straight over there after leaving the station that morning. He picked up his desk phone and called her cell. To his surprise, Maggie answered.

"Maggie?"

"Steve, is Kari with you?"

"No, when was the last time you saw her?"

"She left here about two hours ago. Someone called here and she seemed very upset afterward and just walked out."

"A call from who?"

"I don't know."

Steve cupped the phone, "Chin, forget Kari's cell see if you can get the number of the last call made to my house phone." He put the phone back up to his ear, "Maggie, if she comes home, tell her I need to speak to her right away."

"What's happening, Steve? Have you heard something about JD?"

"No," he sighed, "not yet. I just need to really talk to her."

"Ok,"

He hung up, taking his cell phone off mute, "Where is he now?" he asked Connor.

* * *

Robert walked into his bank and headed toward the customer service desk when the cell phone in his pocket went off. He ran back outside and around the corner for privacy. "Hello."

Bryce sat at the table with Lenny across from him with the phone on speaker, "Do you have the money?" Bryce asked.

"Yes. I have it."

"Meet us at the Lakewood construction site in one hour, inside the main building. We'll be watching so don't try anything stupid. We know the kid's Dad's a cop."

"They don't know about anything. Bring the kid, or no money."

"Don't tell us how this is going to work," Lenny snapped. "We'll tell you!"

"You'll want to see the money first and I'll want to see the kid. Fair exchange."

"Fine!" Bryce agreed, getting a nasty glare from Lenny. "Just make sure it's only you. No cops, like I said we'll be watching and we'll know." He still hadn't told Lenny that the kid's Dad was ex-Seal. They both knew he was a cop but he didn't see the point, afraid it would only bring down more heat on JD from Lenny. He had managed to keep him away from him since the bathtub incidence, but Lenny had a temper that was hard to control sometimes. If he felt pressured there was no telling what he would do.

"No cops, I heard you." Robert pulled the phone away from his ear as it went dead. He pictured the Lakewood construction site, knowing it was a perfect place for them to meet. It had been shut down for over two weeks and they had both worked on it so knew the lay out. So far everything was going as planned. He went back inside the bank to make the transfer of all his money into the overseas account he had opened the previous day.

* * *

"He's at Hawaii National Bank on Lunalilo Home Rd." Connor informed Steve and Danny.

Chin came into his office, "The last call to come in to your home line was from the Caldwell residence."

"This doesn't look good, Steve," Danny announced. "Something's up. We need to find out where Kari is."

"Kono's on her way back in. Call her and tell her to stop and run a trace on Kari's car. The GPS code is in the data base."

Danny looked at him puzzled, "You have a GPS tracker on her car?"

"Yes," he said matter-of-factly and then quickly explained, "It's not so I can watch her every move, Daniel! I trust my wife. It's for precautions. If she ever broke down somewhere with the kids, I could easily find her. Or if the car was ever stolen."

He looked over at Chin, "Malia too?"

"Absolutely," he shrugged. "They're aware of it and approve."

* * *

Kono pulled over and reached over for her laptop. "Give me a minute, Boss," she spoke to Steve over her car speaker, typing in her password to the HPD site. She pulled up Kari's GPS code and entered it in the system. The computer went into thinking mode; "Almost there," the screen refreshed and a blinking red light appeared. Kono zoomed in on the location, "Ok, she just left Bank of Hawaii on Kilauea Ave and is heading west on the H1."

Steve felt a chill run down his spine; everything suddenly came clear, "Oh my God, she wouldn't do that!" He glanced over at Danny, wanting him to tell him his idea was crazy, "She wouldn't try to make an exchange for JD?"

Danny was just as shocked, but as he put all the pieces together; her argument that morning about wanting to pay them off, the Caldwell's were the only ones that knew of the ransom, the unusual call that morning to Steve's house, Kari in the company with Robert Caldwell and now leaving the bank. He looked over at Steve who was at his desk with his laptop open, punching in numbers.

"What are you doing?" Danny came around his desk.

"Checking the account for Ally's House. There should be about five million in that account."

"Isn't that account in both your names? She can't make a withdrawal that large without your approval."

"Yes she can. There were so many checks and withdrawals it became a pain every time I had to sign something so we just made it so she had power of attorney over the account. I need her permission, but she doesn't need mine."

He maneuvered the mouse over the account activity as it brought up the latest transactions. He pushed back in his chair as it hit the back wall, standing up and slamming his hands down on the desk, "Shit! Shit! What the hell is the matter with her?"

Danny leaned in and got a look at what he was so upset about. There were two withdrawals totaling one million dollars from the account that day. "What is she doing? What is she thinking?"

Steve grabbed his cell phone and Chin's off his desk, walking toward the door, "Connor, I want you to bring in Caldwell."

"Wait," Danny followed him out, "what if he already made contact with the Timmons brothers and is supposed to make a drop? If he doesn't show up, that may not be good for JD."

"Goddamnit!" he spat, taking a minute to regroup his thoughts, all the while still in shock that she would go behind his back with something like this. "Connor, keep eyes on him and let us know when he leaves and where he goes."

"Kono," he spoke into Chin's phone, "send that trace on Kari's car to the main computer."

"Sending it now," she couldn't believe what she was hearing, "please tell me that Kari isn't trying to make an exchange for JD?"

"That's what we think." Chin responded.

"Why would she do that?"

Steve couldn't even begin to try and explain it to her; he still couldn't comprehend it himself.

* * *

Kari pulled out the cell phone that Robert gave her. "Yes," she said, feeling sick to her stomach with nerves about what she was about to do, but knew there was no turning back now.

"Did you get the money?"

"Yes, I had to go to two different branches, but I got it."

He smiled into the phone, "Ok, I talked to them and I spoke with JD too. He's fine. They want you to bring the money and then they said they would hand him over."

"You spoke to him?" she felt tears stinging her eyes.

"Yes, he's fine. We have to hurry; they want us to take the money to one of my construction sites. I'll meet you there." He gave her the address and directions on how to get in.

"Ok, I know where that is. I can be there in about ten minutes."

She hung up and put her head down on the steering wheel. "Oh my god, what are you doing, what are you doing?" She wanted to call Steve so badly and even went as far as dialing the numbers on the phone, but knew she was in too deep and didn't even know what to say to him at this point. She set the phone down and sat back, wiping the tears from her eyes. "It's going to be ok," she told herself, putting the car in gear. "Everything is going to be good. I'll just give them the money and then I'll let Steve do his part."

* * *

Connor followed about three car lengths behind Robert, "He's headed east on 72, just passing the Niu Valley shopping center." He slammed on his brakes as a tourist on a motorbike in front of him wiped out. "Shit!" He stopped just before running them over as the car next to him, sideswiped his car. The traffic behind him stopped and he tried to back up, but was pinned. He quickly got out, standing on the front seat, flashing his badge to the car behind him, "Back up! Back up!" The car driver did as he was told but there was still not enough room for Connor to get around the chaos that was erupting around him, "I lost him! I lost him!" he yelled into the cell phone.

* * *

Steve refreshed the screen on the computer and picked up Kari's location. "She's headed east on 72, just ahead of Caldwell. They must be going to meet someplace." He set his phone on the computer, transferring the link to his cell phone. "Kono, catch up with her. We're leaving the office right now headed that way."

Danny tore out of the parking lot heading toward the south part of Oahu with Chin on his tail. He glanced over at Steve who was staring at the blinking red light on his phone, showing Kari's location.

"What is she doing, Danny? It's like she's a different person. I swear to God, if something happens to JD because of this little stunt…"

He didn't say it out loud, but Danny knew what he was thinking. He would never be able to forgive her.

* * *

Kari slowly pulled into the construction site. She followed the dirt road that led up to a building that was half way finished. The sign in front showed a picture of a six-story glass office building, but only two floors had been completed. The metal and wood structure was hollow on the inside and she could almost see clean through to the other side except for a few inner walls that had been raised. She looked over her shoulder for Robert but saw nothing except piles of wood and metal scraps, a trailer and the building.

Lenny walked to the edge of the second floor and peered through a hole in the wall at the dark blue SUV in the parking lot. "I think that's him."

JD sat on the ground holding the car from his Happy Meal. Bryce came up behind Lenny, nudging him out-of-the-way so he could get a look. "Wait until he gets out and then," he paused, "hold on. Here comes another car."

Lenny pushed him aside, "What the fuck did we tell him." He grabbed the cell phone from Bryce, dialing Robert's number.

Robert pulled in behind Kari's car, "I'm here," he said as he answered.

"Who the fuck is in the other car? Don't fuck with us man!"

"I'm not," Robert quickly defended, "it's the kid's Mom. You didn't know this but they're loaded. She brought the money, plus more. There's over $700,000 in cash. She just wants him back."

"Why didn't you tell us this before?" Lenny growled. "Her old man's a cop."

"That's why I didn't tell you. I knew you wouldn't make the deal. He doesn't know we're here. She just wants to make the exchange and get her kid back. Do you see anyone else?"

"Shit!" Lenny stomped his foot, pulling a gun from behind his back, "If you try and screw us the kid is the first to go."

"Money for kid. That's all she wants." Robert hung up and got out, going over to Kari's car.

He opened the backdoor and set a duffel bag on the seat.

Kari looked over her shoulder at him, "What are you doing?"

"They'll be ready in a minute for the exchange." He started putting the money from Kari's bank into the bag.

"Wait," she said, watching him as if he were on feeding frenzy, "You're taking too much!"

He motioned with his head toward the building, trying to distract her, "I just talked to them. JD is here."

Kari glanced toward the building and then back at him. "Stop!"

He zipped up the bag; "It's all here. The money for them." He set her bag down on the front seat, "This is the money they are going to be expecting at the next drop. I'll take it there and call the police."

Kari stared at him, not believing a word he said. She couldn't believe how naïve she had been. She reached back and grabbed the bag from him, "Wait. I'll just give it to them now."

"No!" he shouted, "That's not the plan!" he yanked it from her hands, slamming the back door.

She got out and chased after him on the way to his car, knowing he had played her. "I need that money to get JD back!" She caught up with him and grabbed the bag again. He swung around and clipped the side of her head with his hand. "You have all you need!" He hesitated for just a second, seeing her stumble backwards. He looked down at the money in his hand, seeing his freedom.

She put her hand up to her face, feeling stunned by the blow. She leaned back against her car and watched him get in his.

"Hey!" Lenny shouted from inside the building. He shook JD by the collar, "Call for your Mom." When JD didn't respond fast enough he shook him again.

"Mommy!" JD yelled out.

Kari ran to the front of the car, "JD!"

"Bring the money," Lenny called out.

Bryce came up behind him, taking JD from him. "Put the gun away!"

Lenny shoved him, "After we get the money!"

Kari went around the passenger side and grabbed the bag with the money in it. The cell phone was sitting on the seat with Steve's number still dialed in. She looked up to the vacant building and picked up the phone.

Steve looked at the call coming in, not recognizing the number, "Commander McGarrett."

"Steve," Kari cried frantically, "I messed up! Oh my God!"

"Kari! Where are you?"

"I'm so sorry," she choked up, "I did something really bad. I was just trying to get JD back," her voice broke.

"I know Kari," he said calmly, retaining his anger, hearing the fear in her voice, "I know about the money, just tell me where you are?"

Kari looked up hearing Lenny call her again.

"Hey Bitch! If you want this kid back you better show me some cash now!" Lenny yelled out.

She couldn't remember the name of the place, "Um," she ran her hand through her hair, looking for a sign with the name, "It's a construction site off of highway 72. The turn off is just past Kawaihae Street."

He looked over at Danny, "Got it?"

"Got it," he replied.

"Hey!" Lenny warned again, "You got ten seconds."

"Steve," Kari sobbed, "I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry!" She set the phone down and grabbed the bag off the seat.

"Just wait for me. We're almost there." When she didn't answer, he pulled the phone away to see if he was still connected. "Kari!"

She stopped a few feet in front of the car; holding the bag, "Don't hurt him! I'm here!" she stepped closer. "I have what you want! Let me see my son?"

Bryce peered around the corner of the wall on the first floor, holding JD against his legs, "Bring the money inside," he yelled out to her.

"I want to see JD."

"Do you want to see him with a bullet in him or without?" Lenny tormented. "Bring the money inside."

Lenny watched from the second floor as she slowly walked with the bag in both hands toward the building.

* * *

"There," Steve pointed, "Stop here!"

He jumped out of the car, running up the dirt road. He spoke to Kono through his radio on his vest, "Where are you?"

Kono knelt behind a pile of woods scraps, holding her rifle. "I'm on the west side of the building. I can see Kari. She has a bag and is making her way inside."

"Damn it," Steve groaned, making his way up closer until he was behind her car. He looked around the back and could see her. "Can you see JD?" he asked Kono.

"No, I don't see anyone inside yet."

Steve motioned to Danny and Chin with his hand to stay to the left behind the trailer.

* * *

Lenny ran to the edge of the second floor just above Bryce and JD. He watched Bryce hesitate. "Go get it!"

"Let her come inside!" He held on to JD around the neck.

Kari scanned the inside of the building but didn't see anyone, "JD!"

"Mommy!" he replied, pulling away from Bryce running toward her.

"Fuck!" Lenny yelled, firing a shot in the air, "Stop lady or I'll shoot him!"

Bryce ran after him, catching him by the back of the neck.

Steve heard the shot and didn't hesitate. That feeling from the dream engulfed him and he came around the back of the SUV and ran towards Kari. It didn't matter what she had done or how angry he was at her. In the end, she was still his wife and carrying his baby and he loved her too much to let her stand in harm's way when he was there to prevent it, now matter what the price was to his own safety.

"Someone else is here!" Bryce yelled out.

"Dad!" JD screamed, fighting to get away from his grip.

Lenny ran to the front just in time to see Steve grab Kari around the shoulders. She dropped the bag as he drug her over behind a brick wall by the front entrance.

She screamed not realizing what was happening. He pushed her against the wall in the corner, using his body as a shield, waiting for retaliation. When none came he leaned back just slightly, knowing they were out sight of the shooter. He turned her around and put his gun in his holster.

"Steve!" she shook uncontrollably, trying to make eye contact with him but he refused. She watched him un-zip his bulletproof vest and slip it off his shoulders.

He heard Kono's voice, through his radio, "I see JD! He looks all right. There's one person with him. I don't see the other one."

Kari knew what he was planning and shook her head, "No, Steve! You keep it on."

He didn't respond but just glared at her as if that was going to happen. He lifted her left arm and slipped the vest on her before turning her around and putting her right arm in. He grabbed her shoulders and spun her back around so she was facing him. She stared at his face as he zipped it up and pulled on the side straps adjusting to her size, even with the baby she was still smaller than him. She grabbed his hand, forcing him to look at her. She wanted to say something but knew anything she said right now would be pointless. She had literally made the biggest mistake of her life and they both knew it.

Half of him was relieved beyond words that she was standing in front of him and safe, but the other half wanted to scream and shake her until all his anger was satisfied for putting herself, JD and the baby in this kind of danger. He sat her down on the ground and pointed in her face, "Don't move from this spot!"

She saw so much anger in his eyes as she shook her head, "I won't," she whispered, cowering before him.

He pulled the radio off the vest and spoke to Kono as he made his way to the edge of the brick wall so he could peer inside the open building. "Can you get a clear shot?"

Kari looked up as Danny came around the corner of the wall. He gave her the stink eye and shook his head, making his way up behind Steve. She curled her hands up in a ball under her chin and laid her head on her bent knees, cursing herself over and over, praying that no one would be hurt because of her stupidity and carelessness.

"I can get a shot, Steve." Kono responded, "What do you want me to do?" She held steady with Bryce in her sights as he held JD around the neck.

"Does he have a weapon?"

"I can't tell, maybe."

"Hold steady, let's see if we get out this the easy way." He called out to Bryce and Lenny, "This JD's father. I'm Commander McGarrett with Five O. Let JD go, drop your weapons and come out with your hands up and no one gets hurt."

Lenny was sure they still had the upper hand, "If you don't drop your weapons and leave, then the kid is dead."

"Take the shot Kono," Steve ordered with no hesitancy.

Bryce felt a sharp jab in his neck and a spilt second later there was no feeling. He dropped dead to the ground behind JD.

The second JD felt the release on his neck he bolted toward the last place he saw his Father. "Dad!" he called out, tripping over a board on the ground, landing hard on the cement floor.

Steve came around the corner, with his gun drawn, "JD! Come here!" he yelled as he ran toward him.

Lenny dropped down from the second floor and fired four shots toward Steve as they both ran towards JD. Steve got there first and slid down on his knees, shoving JD back on the floor and trying to raise his gun hand.

Lenny growled leveling his gun at Steve for a second time when Danny's gun fired three shots into his chest. He stumbled backwards before falling on the ground, lying just a few feet from his brother.

"JD!" Steve grabbed the back of his shirt, pulling him up off the ground. He little feet scrambled on the floor not able to get to his Dad fast enough. His arms flew around Steve's neck and he hugged him tightly. "It's ok Buddy." He dropped the gun in right hand, feeling a slight pressure in his upper chest.

Kari came up behind them and put her hand on Steve's shoulder as she knelt, holding them both. She kissed JD's head over and over, running her hand over his little body. He looked up and went from his Father's arms to his Mother's. Kari hugged him tightly and smiled at Steve, reaching up and touching his sweaty face. He didn't respond but just stared at her with a penetrating look like he was trying to tell her something. He suddenly took a deep breath like he was struggling to get air and came off his knees, sitting on the ground, reaching back with his left hand, bracing himself. He tried to lean forward, gasping for air again. It was then that Kari saw the blood on his shirt.

"Danny!" she screamed, reaching out and touching his chest. The second his shirt made contact with his body, more blood appeared.

"I'm ok," he reassured her, losing the strength in his left arm that was bracing him up. He felt Danny's hands on his shoulders catch him, laying him back on the ground.

"Kono!" Danny shouted as she came inside, "Get Paramedics up her!" The look in his eyes startled her, "Hurry!"

Kari leaned over him, "Steve! Steve!" She touched his face, leaving traces of blood on him from her hand. "Oh Steven, no, no! I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry!" she cried.

Danny pushed her back as he and Chin came around the other side of him. He cut through his shirt with Chin's knife and saw two bullet wounds, one in his right shoulder and the other one on the left side, just below his breastbone. "It's ok, Steve. It doesn't look bad." He shuttered, trying to keep it together, knowing all along that Steve knew better.

JD crawled around Kari and got a glimpse at why his Mother was in such a panic. His eyes grew wide and his face showed all the horror of his worst nightmare. "Dad!" he screamed, "Dad!" he screamed even louder, putting his hand on Steve's stomach, angry that he wasn't wearing his vest.

Steve looked up at Chin, who had knelt at his shoulder. He went to speak and could taste blood in his mouth, not wanting JD to see that. He reached up pulling down on Chin's arm, "Get…him…out of her." He choked trying to keep from coughing anything up, "I…don't want…him to see this."

"Ok, Steve," Chin took his hand that held his arm and squeezed it before letting go. He reached over him and picked up JD under both arms as he stood up. His legs kicked and he fought him mercilessly as Chin walked away, "I want to stay!" he cried, "I want to stay with my Dad!" He kicked and hit Chin over and over on the face and shoulder. He leaned over his back, pushing up on Chin's shoulders trying to get loose, "Don't go to heaven Dad!" he yelled out to him, "Don't go to heaven yet Dad!" He squirmed in Chin's arms, screaming at him out of fear and frustration at the relentless hold. Chin took him out behind the car and sat on a pile of bricks, holding him tightly as JD sobbed and kicked his legs, "I want my Dad!"

Steve closed his eyes, coughing up the blood that he'd been holding in, not wanting to see the look on Kari's face either when it happened.

"Steve!" she screamed, "Open your eyes baby please!"

He felt sleepy and could hear her but it felt good to rest, his body was weightless and he couldn't feel their hands on him anymore. He felt another convulsion, but it wasn't voluntary and for just a few seconds he could almost breath normal again. He opened his eyes and saw Danny and Kono working on him with a first aid kit. Danny's hands had blood on them and they both looked worried. He wanted to tell them he was fine. His eyes moved over to Kari. She spoke to him but everything around him was quiet even though it seemed hectic. She was crying and it made him sad that she was crying; he didn't like to see her that way, ever. "Don't cry," he said to her.

Kari leaned down when his mouth moved, as if he were trying to speak. She wiped the blood off of his lips that were turning a deadly blue, "Steven, it's going to be ok. I can hear help coming. You're so strong baby. Please be strong." She leaned down in his ear, "I love you so much. I'm so sorry," she moaned, caressing her hand over his head, "I can't make it without you."

She leaned back as Danny pushed her out-of-the-way. "Move!" He leaned over Steve, putting his hands on his chest, "Kono breathe for him!" He pushed up and down on his chest, "You stubborn son-of-a-bitch! Don't you dare back off now!"


	11. Chapter 11

"No, I'm staying here!" Kari gripped the arms of the chair as if they might try to drag her away.

Malia looked up at Chin and shook her head. "Let her be." She put her hand on his back and guided him out of the room. She put her arms around her husband and hugged him tightly, knowing it could easily have been him.

Chin held her close, trying his best to comfort her and at the same time needing the reassurance from her that everything was going to be ok, but as he looked over her shoulder at Kari, his emotions turned raw. He was so angry with her, they all were. He felt another hand on his shoulder and turned to see Kono. Her eyes were puffy and red and the second they made eye contact she broke down again, laying her head on his shoulder as he took her in too, holding both of them.

Danny sat slouched in a chair behind them with Steve's blood still on his shirt, on his pants, his shoes and even in his hair. Malia had tried to wipe what she could from his hands with a moist towel and gave him a set of scrubs to change into, but they sat on his lap an hour later, still waiting to be put on.

He stared at Kari through the glass doors unsure of how he was going to handle her. At the moment he hated her. He hated her with so much passion he had to look away or he was afraid he might yell it out. He never dreamt he would ever be in this position. He always knew that if anything ever happened to Steve that he would step up and see that she and the kids were taken of, it was an unspoken rule between them. He knew that Steve would have done the same for he and Gracie, but as he sat there, he was troubled by the obligation to his best friend to care for the same person that put him in this position to begin with, how was he supposed to comfort her now?

He bent his head and used the scrubs in his lap to wipe off the tears of frustration and sorrow that had began to form. He felt he was being pulled in every direction. He was so furious at her he clenched his hands into fists at just the thought of it, but then the other side of him felt for Kari, his friend. He had become just as close in many ways to her as he was with Steve. It was a vicious circle of emotions that came and went, leaving him feeling dazed and confused. He lifted his head and looked at the pitiful sight of her again, trying desperately to see his friend and not the person responsible for this horrible day, but it was difficult to separate the two. She looked over at him and made eye contact just long enough for him to feel the impact of the guilt she was harboring over her actions. Her head went back down on the bed as her body trembled. He stood up, setting the scrubs on the chair and forced himself to walk over to her.

Kari let her fingers release the tight hold on the chair as they left the room. She kept her eyes downcast, not wanting to look at any of them. She was to blame for this whole mess. It was her carelessness that brought them all to this place. She knew it and felt every bit of their anger, not trying to or even wanting to defend herself. She deserved every bit of what they were feeling towards her, but it was only a fraction of what she was putting on herself. She laid her head back on the bed and slipped her hand inside of his. He felt warm as she laid her cheek on it, looking up at him, gliding her hand up his arm and then back down, waiting for him to open his eyes and smile down at her, telling her everything was going to be ok, like he always did. She began to cry over that thought, knowing nothing was ever going to be like it was. How could he ever forgive her for what she did? How could she ever forgive herself for what she's done to him, to their kids, to his friends? She deserved every bit of anger and resentment they felt.

She turned her head in their direction and met Danny's eyes as he stared at her. She felt all of his anger as if he was reaching out and slapping her across the face. She quickly turned away, frightened that the loyalty she had with these people was going to be severed forever, especially from the one's hand she was holding. She prayed and cried at the same time, not only for his recovery, but also for his forgiveness. Both were touch and go at the moment.

Danny stood over her holding his hand above her, struggling with the anger he felt towards her and the pity over the fact that she knew what she did was wrong and was paying the ultimate price for it. He slowly put his hand on her back, knowing he couldn't keep his distance with her in this condition. He did it more for Steve than for himself.

Kari looked up at him fighting to say what she was feeling more than anything else, "I'm…so sorry!" she whimpered, seeing Steve's dried blood on his clothes, making the moment even more tortures'.

He didn't respond but just slightly nodded his understanding, pulling her up under the arm and hugging her as she stood. He could feel the baby bump against his stomach as she clung to the back of his shirt with her head on his shoulder. He looked over at Chin and both of them knew this wasn't forgiveness; this was just being decent. She deserved at least that; after all it was Kari, not some stranger. The forgiveness part was going to take time and depended solely on the outcome of Steve's recovery, if there was one.

He looked down at the motionless body laying there, not recognizing the pale, swollen man he knew as his partner and best friend. The tube coming out of his chest drained the steady stream of fluid from his damaged lung. He had bruises on his chest from the CPR he and Kono had performed. His heart was in good shape but he had suffocated which was what brought on the cardiac arrest moments after the shooting. They had been able to keep the blood pumping and his brain oxygenated until the Paramedics arrived only minutes later. They used the paddles to get his heart started and drained the blood from his lung right there before putting him in the ambulance.

The whole scene was a blur now, thinking back. All he could remember was the dreadful feeling of arriving at the hospital to the news that he had died on the way. He followed behind the ambulance, leaving behind Chin and Kono to wait for the backup officers. There was no question that he would be the one to go with him and there was no question that Kari would be the one to ride with Steve in the ambulance, no matter the cause and effect of the situation. She was his wife.

He was out of his car and right there when they took him in through the ER. The only good thing about that moment was that they read off his vitals to the awaiting Doctor, which meant he was still alive. He helped Kari down and held her hand as they followed Steve inside, but from that moment on he had kept his distance from her. She didn't even try to seek comfort from him, or try to give any to him, knowing she didn't deserve it and that it wouldn't be accepted. They both stood at arm's length away from each other and watched as the doctor and nurses worked on him.

Malia showed up several minutes later after hearing the news from upstairs as they were prepping the surgery room. She walked up to both of them, taking Kari's hand, "Have they told you anything yet?"

Neither one of them spoke but shook their heads, nor did their eyes leave the activity going on behind the closed glass doors, unable to turn away as if their attention on the matter at hand was somehow linked to his fate.

Malia went inside the room and to the front of the bed, observing the activity and speaking to the doctor. They looked at the X-rays on the wall, pointing out certain areas. She slipped on a pair of surgical gloves and began to examine the wound on his chest, nodding to the ER doctor as if she were in agreement with him. She pulled them back off only a few seconds later, dropping them in a garbage can on her way out of the room. The doors closed behind her and she stood before them, "His left lung was slightly penetrated by the bullet, causing it to collapse which means the air is leaking out to the area around it causing the swelling around his chest and heart, and its also filling with blood and fluid. They're going to wait and see if the bleeding stops on its own before they go in and try to remove the bullets. The one in his shoulder shouldn't cause any permanent damage."

"Why?" Danny asked, "Why not just go in and fix it now?"

"The bullet is lodged between his lungs and his heart in a very delicate spot. There's just too much swelling to go in right now, but if the bleeding doesn't stop then there's a chance he might lose part of his lung."

Kari gasp, putting her hands over her mouth, "Oh no, no!"

"What about the bullet? What if the bleeding doesn't stop and the swelling doesn't go down?" Danny asked.

Malia swallowed, giving tragic information to people she didn't know was hard enough, but this was like her family, "Given where the bullet is lodged, it would be a very difficult surgery. Let's just wait and see what happens. They're going to leave him down here for now."

"How long," Kari whispered, "how long will they wait for the bleeding to stop?"

"An hour, maybe two if his vitals stay strong. No more than that. They need to get that bullet out regardless."

She didn't have to say it; they both knew what it meant. If the bleeding didn't stop then his chances just went down dramatically.

It had been just over an hour and the tiny stream of fluid continued to flow into the plastic bag attached to the side of the bed.

Danny released Kari and set her back down in the chair. She returned to the same position with her cheek resting on Steve's hand as she held it with both of hers.

They both looked up as a nurse came in again to check his vitals and the fluid bag. The ER doctor from earlier came in as well, lifting the thick bandage that was laid over his chest protecting the open wounds. He walked over to a phone on the wall and punched in three numbers.

"This is Dr. Brease, I'm sending up my gunshot patient, McGarrett. Is S4 still prepped?" he paused looking over at Danny and Kari, "Ok then, page Dr. Lind." He hung up and leaned over a laptop that was attached to a small table in the corner, typing information as he spoke to them. "The fluid filling his lung has slowed and I think it's about as good as it's going to get. We need to get those bullets before an infection sets in. Some of the swelling has gone done around the effected area in his chest, which is good." He closed the top of the computer and turned around to them, lifting the bars up on the side of the bed, "He's going up to the fourth floor. You can wait up there for him to come out of surgery."

"Is he going to lose part of his lung?" Kari shivered, still holding his hand.

"I can't say yes or no. I know you want to hear more than that, but until they get in there, there's really no telling what they have to work with."

Danny moved out of the way as another nurse came in. "How long will the surgery last?"

"Again, I don't want to give you a set time because if it takes longer than that, then people start to worry and think the worst, when that may not be the case at all. So I'll say more than two hours, but less than twenty-four. The surgeon upstairs is Dr. Lind. She's very good. She's very talented in these situations, you're lucky she's on call today."

Lucky was not something either one of them were feeling at the moment. Kari stood up as the nurse came around her side, lifting the bars on the bed. She smiled at her as if telling her everything was going to be fine.

"I've worked the ER for six years and I've seen a lot of gun shot victims. He's really is doing well considering."

That was the first good news she had heard over the last hour. "He's so stubborn," she halfheartedly laughed and cried at the same time.

"That's a good thing." The nurse smiled, moving to the front of the bed, "It's ok if you want to give him a kiss him before he goes."

Kari put her hand on his arm and moved up to the front of the bed, looking down at him. His face was so pale and void of any expression. She didn't think she would have recognized him right away if she had just walked in. The tube coming from his lungs and out his mouth helping him breath made him look even more vulnerable than he already was. She put her hand on his forehead, brushing his hair back, kissing him there. "I love you," she whispered, closing her eyes and gently rubbing her cheek against his, "I'm so sorry for hurting you." She had said those words to herself a thousand times over the last hour but this time hearing it out loud and saying it too him were the hardest of all. She felt a hand pull her back as she began to sob with her head on his shoulder afraid to let him go, fearing it might be the last time she ever touched him this way, even if he fully recovered. The belief of him not ever forgiving her was so strong she felt it was almost certain.

She stood in the room after he was gone, covering her face with her hands, left alone with the horrible decisions she had made that day that were effecting so many lives. She just wanted the floor to swallow her up so she could disappear, but knew that would be the easy way out. She had to face each and every one of them and let them deal with her in their own way. She wouldn't force herself on them; especially Chin and Danny who she knew were the angriest. The hug Danny had given her earlier wasn't for her benefit; she knew that, it was because he felt had to do it, not because he wanted too. Kono was her best friend, but she felt that distance from her now as well. She had broken up their team because she hadn't trusted them like she should have. She knew it was going to be a long time before they ever trusted her again, or if they ever would.


	12. Chapter 12

JD knelt on the chair, leaned over his plate and sucked in the orange square of Jell-O with just his mouth. The slurping noise made the two nurses and doctor at the next table turn and look.

"JD!" Kari scolded him, "Don't do that again! Use your spoon." She scooped a small bite of sweet potatoes from her plate and fed it to Casey who sat on her lap.

He sat back on his heels, talking with his mouth full, "Dad taught me. He said it's the only way to eat Jell-O."

Kari sighed, reaching over and moving the hair off his forehead, "Ok."

"When can I see Dad?" he asked for what seemed to him like the hundredth time, looking up at her intently. He didn't understand why he had to wait so long. Everyone had told him he was ok and that the doctors were with him.

She picked up her napkin and wiped off the orange mess that had fallen on his shirt, "Not for a while honey. The doctor is still making him better"

Maggie walked up and sat down at the table with them. She picked up JD's empty plate and set it on the tray. "Stop feeding that child your dinner Kari. You need to eat. She's had hers."

"Anything yet?" She asked hopeful, knowing she had just come from the waiting room, were Danny and the others were.

"No," She reached over taking Casey from her, "you should be there when the doctor comes out."

Kari put her elbow on the table and let her head fall into her hand, "I can't. I think I upset them being there." She moved her hand to cover her eyes as the tears began to form again, trying to hide it from JD. She needed those same people right now more than ever, but at the same time she felt her presence would just cause them more heartache. That hurt worst of all. She felt a flutter from the baby and wiped her eyes. She picked up a scoop of food, forcing herself to eat. It had been over four hours since they had taken him into surgery and the wait was torturous. She tried to keep an upbeat attitude so as not to frighten JD, but it was getting more and more difficult to hide.

He stared at her, seeing for only the second time in his life his Mother cry because she was sad. The first time was earlier that day after his Dad had been shot. He scooted off his chair and went and stood next to her, putting his hand on her knee. It scared him to see her like this. He needed her to be happy which in turn made him feel safe knowing his Dad was going to be ok. She told him he was fine, but if he was fine then why were they in a hospital and why was she crying and why couldn't he see him.

"I want to go see Dad right now," he demanded. His bottom lip quivering as he teetered on the verge of a temper tantrum if he didn't get his way soon! He had been pulled away from him and forced to sit with Chin and Kono when they took him away in the ambulance, telling him then he could see him soon and that he was alright. He had to talk about the two men that had taken him, telling them stories about spending the night at their house and what they did, again when he asked about his Dad, they told him soon and reassured him that he was fine. He'd gone over to Maggie's and had to help her get Casey's bag ready to go to the hospital, being told he could see him when they got there. He had sat patiently and ate his dinner, but now he had lost all the patients he had with everyone and wanted to see his Dad right now, like they had promised. He wanted to believe that he was ok, but he was beginning to think they were all liars. The frightening ordeal of seeing the blood on his chest and knowing he had been shot was still so fresh in his mind, scaring him all over again.

He hit Kari on the knee impatiently, "Mom!"

"JD, stop," she said passively, "soon honey."

"No!" The tantrum was coming when he looked past her and saw Danny walking toward them. He bolted around her running over to him, knowing whenever Danny was around so was his Dad, "I want to see my Dad?"

He bent over scooping him up, "Ok buddy," he looked at Kari, motioning with his head down the hall, "the doctor's here. I think it's good news." He held onto JD and walked back out the entrance to the waiting room that was only a few feet away.

Kari quickly followed after he and JD, seeing the doctor down the hall already speaking to Chin and Kono. She caught up with Danny as they arrived at the same time.

"Mrs. McGarrett?" Dr. Lind asked.

"Yes!" Kari said, almost out of breath from just the anticipation of the news. She tried to read the face of the older Asian woman who looked to be in her late forties. She was several inches shorter than Kari but held herself as if she were ten feet tall.

She smiled, "I'll start by saying, he's doing very well."

Kari put both her hands over her heart and had never felt so relieved in her entire life. The tears came again, only this time she smiled through them. "His lung," she asked, praying the good news would continue, "they said that he might lose part of his lung?"

"The bleeding stopped completely while we were prepping him for surgery. I was able to repair the tear and he's actually breathing on his own, which is a huge plus. The bullet wasn't as hard to get at as I had anticipated. It was staring right at me trying to hide," she smiled, looking at JD, "I didn't like it being in there so I just plucked it out like it was a bad seed and tossed it in the garbage." She imitated her words with her hands, making him smile.

"Can I see my Dad?" he asked her, hoping she would be the end of the long trail. "Please!" He threw in the magic word just incase she might ask for it.

She hesitated for a moment, never having anyone that young ask her in such a persistent way before. He seemed determined. "Yes," she looked at Kari, "I think that would be ok." She put her finger up to her lips, "He's sleeping so you have to be very quiet and you can only see him for a just a minute, ok?"

JD nodded, squirming in Danny's arms until he set him down, "Whoa hold on."

He put him down on the ground as the doctor took his hand, "Does anyone have any questions for me?"

"So you're saying he should make a full recovery?" Danny asked.

"So far so good. I'm not saying he'll be running marathons by the end of the year, it's going to take some time, but I don't think he's in any imminent danger." She smiled, "I believe we are past that, so take of sigh of relief and let's go see him." She squeezed JD's hand as he jumped excitedly.

Chin put a hand on Danny's shoulder, "I need a beer," he confessed, feeling the stress of the day just roll off of him.

"Me too, a six-pack," he agreed, following the doctor and JD down the corridor.

Kari met Maggie as she came down the hallway with Casey, "Everything's good! He should be fine." She couldn't stop smiling.

Maggie stopped in her tracks and kissed Casey on the head, hugging her since she was the closest one to her, "Praise Jesus," she whispered.

"I'm going in to see him," Kari said to her backing up.

"Go!" she waved her on, kissing Casey again and hugging and shaking her playfully until she laughed.

They were all smiles until they entered the room. Two nurses worked on either side of him. One was cutting off strips of tape and sticking them on the rail of the bed. She then straightened the IV coming out the back of his right hand and began to tape down the small tubes so they wouldn't pinch close. The other nurse spread a clear jelly like substance over the staples on his chest where they had done the incision. She saw JD and took a large square gauze bandage and laid it over his chest and then a blanket over that, hiding the wounds.

Dr. Lind whispered to the nurses, as she approached Steve, "This little boy would like to see his Dad."

They both smiled at him and backed away from the bed.

She picked him up, bracing him on her hip, "He might look kind of different, but that's ok. He'll look like your Dad again in few hours after the swelling goes down. He's very tired. He'll probably sleep all night and take lots of naps tomorrow too," she whispered.

JD stared at his face that looked fatter than normal, not sure that was even his Dad. He almost said something about that when he saw the tattoos on his arms, realizing it really was him. She moved closer to the bed, "You can touch his hand but be very gentle."

He reached out as she bent closer. He took his fingers and glided them carefully over the back of Steve's hand. "What is that?" he asked, curious about the heart monitor wrapped over his left index finger that fed into an EKG machine on the wall.

She pointed toward the wavy green lines that moved across the screen in a dark green color. "You see that? That little clip on his finger is hooked into that machine and tells us how heart is doing."

Everyone in the room had their eyes on it.

"Right now it says 98 beats per minute. Which is very good."

JD looked back down and gently touched his finger with the clip on it, amazed by that piece of information.

"Do you like to play ball with your Dad?"

"We like to swim," he told her, "we can swim a long way together." his voice barely above a whisper.

"You'll be swimming together again soon. You should say goodbye now."

"Bye Dad. I love you." he looked at her, "Can he hear me?"

"Of course." She turned around and walked past the four of them, "Not too much longer."

JD watched him until they were out of the room, finally satisfied.

Kari approached the bed first, standing behind a nurse as she finished taping down the gauze bandage over his wound. She had counted twelve staples on his chest and six up on his shoulder.

The nurses finished and one left while the other stayed and took a chair by the monitor with a computer tablet, updating the information.

Danny, Chin and Kono stood on the opposite sides, all four of them studying his face that still seemed sickly but not as pale as before.

"He looks better," Kari said, taking his hand.

"He looks like hell," Danny corrected her, "He looks like he just had two slugs pulled out of him. Don't say he looks good."

Kono looked at Chin, rolling her eyes while he just shrugged, not agreeing with Danny that this was the time nor place to vent, but still not willing to defend Kari either. The events of the day were still too fresh.

Kari didn't bother to look up at him. She didn't want to see the anger in his eyes that she was sure mirrored his tone. "I didn't say he looked good. I said he looks better." She thought that maybe this good news might soften their anger, but she was wrong. Part of her felt like an intruder in that room, like she didn't deserve to be there. Maybe she didn't, but she also didn't care at the moment what they thought, she was staying with him, nothing could have drug her away.

* * *

Kari stood just outside Steve's room, kissing the kids goodbye. "You be good for Maggie, JD. Help out with Casey."

"Can I come back tomorrow?" he pushed on the door, peeking inside at him, "I want to come back tomorrow too."

"Sure honey," she put her hand on his head, gliding it over his soft hair, "I'll call Maggie when Daddy wakes up. He'll want to see you too."

He looked up and smiled at that. "I'll bring some games that we can play."

"It might be a while before he can play games, but you can watch some cartoons." She leaned over and kissed Casey. She instinctively reached her arms out for her Mother. Kari took her and held her, glad that she was too young to understand what was happening. She kissed her once more and squeezed her little body before handing her back. She fussed for just a moment before settling, knowing Maggie's arms just as well as her Mom and Dad's.

"I'll bring you some fresh clothes tomorrow. Please try to have something besides coffee. That cafeteria is open all night." She gave her a stern look, "You need to take care of yourself too."

Kari nodded in agreement, rubbing her hand over her belly, "I'm actually getting hungry now that things have settled some. I'll get something in a while. Thank you for your help, Maggie."

"Everything's going to be fine honey, you'll see."

She wished she could believe that. Maggie was the only one that didn't harbor any resentment against her for what she did; then again she was like a Mother to her and knew she would stand behind her no matter what.

* * *

The room was quiet except for the occasional humming from the machines on the wall. Kari put her hand behind her neck and squeezed, forcing her head back as she pushed forward with her hand, trying to loosen up the muscles, relieved that the others had gone home, satisfied that Steve was out of any danger.

She set down the remains of the turkey sandwich, feeling full. She sat back in the chair, rubbing her hands over her stomach, looking down at her swollen belly. The baby had been quiet the last few hours, probably sleeping, she thought. She looked up at him as he too slept. The doctor was right about the swelling in his face, it had gone down and he looked like himself again. So handsome and strong, even in the condition he was in. She had no idea what would happen when he woke up, or how she would ever tell him how sorry she was for everything. She only hoped that somehow the right words would come to her and more than that, that he would accept them. She cupped her belly with her hands remembering being pregnant with JD and Casey and how attentive Steve was in her last few months. He took care of her and always made sure she had everything she needed. The last few months of this pregnancy were going to be difficult. She felt sorry for her unborn baby that she wouldn't be able to tell it the happy stories that she could to JD and Casey. It wasn't even born yet and she was already harboring that Motherly guilt. It was another person to add to the long list of disappointments. She asked herself again for the thousandths time, '_what where you thinking_?' but the answer everyone was looking for still evaded her, even the excuses she tried to tell herself while it was happening now seemed unworthy, even to her.

It was almost midnight and she was beginning to feel the weight of the last two days. She had hardly slept the night before and now this. She pulled the chair closer to the bed and put her arm on the mattress, laying her head on it. She thought she would just close her eyes for a few minutes but with a full stomach and the lack of sleep, a few minutes turned into hours.

* * *

Steve opened his eyes, expecting to be in his bedroom. He looked around the faintly lit room from the machines and the morning sunrise coming in through the window, trying to get his bearings, confused about where he was. He looked over, seeing the IV next to his bed and all at once it came flooding back.

'JD!' he thought suddenly, and then remembered he was safe and Chin had carried him away. After that, it was unclear what had happened or how he got to the hospital. He couldn't remember anything, but he did recall everything that happened before that.

He tried to lift his right hand and felt a shooting pain up his arm; he had been shot in the shoulder he remembered. He tried to lift his head, to get a look at his chest, but it was too painful; he couldn't believe how exhausted he felt, knowing he must have gone through surgery. He knew he had been shot right away, feeling both the bullets enter him, one right after the other. He also recalled that terrifying helpless feeling of not being able to lift his right arm that held his gun and seeing the shooter coming at he and JD. All he could remember thinking in that split second was how he could divert the man's attention away from his son so that all the bullets would hit him and not JD. He also recalled realizing in that moment that even though he would be saving JD's life, that he was going to die in front him. It was a brutal memory that upset him even then, knowing how close they came.

He had managed to escape that nightmare, but couldn't erase the image of JD's horrified expression when he saw the bullet wounds, or the fearful screams coming from his little boy as Chin carried him off, begging him not to die. He felt a tear slip out the corner of his eye just recalling the chilling moment and knowing that JD would be old enough to remember that forever. It broke his heart that his son would have that traumatic memory of him.

Kari lifted her head and moaned, feeling stiff. She sat back and that's when she saw that he was awake. She smiled and stood up, leaning over him. "Steve," she said happily, gliding her hand over his hair. "Everything's ok. You're going to be fine." It was then that she saw the tears sliding down from the corner of his eyes as he stared at her.

She froze, seeing that disappointment and grief that she prayed wouldn't be there.

"What did you do to me, Kari?" he whispered, still so weak, "Why did you do this to us?"

She took the hand that was on him and covered her mouth to stop herself from crying out. She bent her head, not able to see that look of pain in his eyes that she had put there.

He couldn't figure out what he had done to her that would have made her go against him in such a way. He loved her, he took care of her and he had never deceived her. He'd done everything he had promised and everything a husband was supposed too. Yet she lied to him and put all of them, including JD and their unborn baby in grave danger because she didn't trust him. "I've never asked you for anything," he moaned, gritting his teeth through the pain in his body as he became tense, "except to trust me! I've never hurt you." He felt no guilt for his harsh tone as she stood there crying in front of him, it scared him though that he felt so betrayed that he didn't feel any empathy for her, not an ounce.

"Steve," was all she could get out before he slammed her again.

"I almost died in front of JD!" Tears of frustration and anger dripped on his pillow. "Just think what that would have done to him! You put us there, Kari." He closed his eyes, wishing he could get up and leave the room. He didn't want to see her; he was too angry and in too much pain. He felt sick over the vial thoughts that were going through his head that he wanted to scream out at her. Words he would have killed another man for saying to her.

"I would never do anything to hurt you," she cried.

"You wouldn't?" he stared at her amazed by that statement, turning both his palms up as if showing himself to her, "Look at me," he growled, "this hurts Kari, and the pain of knowing that you brought this on me hurts worst than anything I've ever felt in my life." Part of him wished he had died, because he didn't want to live with this pain he felt at the moment. She broke his heart.

She felt crushed under the weight of her guilt. He was so angry and so hurt. She didn't have to lookup to see his tears, she could hear them, and that scared her even more.

"Go home Kari," he whimpered. "Go home. I don't want you here."

She backed away from the bed; unable to defend herself because there was nothing she could have said that would have justified her actions. He was right. She felt at that moment that she had lost him. He didn't want her there. Loyalty was the one thing that he built all his relationships around. It was the foundation of whether or not he would allow you into his life. It was the strongest bond they shared, he had told her that many times over the years. He trusted her with his life and she could trust him the same way. In his eyes she had broken that bond, and she knew it.

She left the room and leaned against the wall as the door closed, shaking all over, covering her face with her hands, still in a daze and unable to convince herself that she could repair what she had broken. She would walk through fire if she had too, and prepared herself that it just might be that difficult, but in the end if he left her, she would have only herself to blame, but she also knew that it would slowly kill her. She couldn't imagine her life without him; it was too frightening.

The door closed behind her and he had never felt so alone. His family had become everything to him. She was everything. He seldom carried a thought in his head that didn't revolve around her. He came to rely on her for his happiness. It was easy because she had always made him so happy. His anger turned to guilt for speaking to her in that way when she was pregnant. He shouldn't have upset her so much, but she hurt him so deep and his first reaction was anger. This was such an important time in their marriage when they should feel the most blessed, in the past it had also brought them closer together, sharing those intimate moments alone when it was just the two of them and the baby inside her. She somehow always made him feel like he was just as important in the pregnancy as she was. It deeply saddened him that he might lose that with this baby.

He didn't understand where it had all gone wrong. He must have done something to her, or neglected her in some way, but what and how? It was a tremendous blow to his self-worth in this relationship. He had worked so hard to gain her trust over the last five years, more so than anything else. He thought he was safe with her, but maybe that's where he lost it, maybe he had given up too much of himself, trusted too much. It was such a hard lesson for him his whole life. He had always been the most afraid of the people that were closest to him, but with Kari he had escaped that fear, until now. He should have known better. It devastated him that they wouldn't have that bond between them anymore, how he could ever trust her like that again after this. It was too dangerous, because what he was feeling at that moment was pure hell. He didn't know how he was going to live with her harboring these feelings, but he also didn't know how he would ever live without her. It was a vicious circle that scared him to death. He didn't want to lose his family, but at the moment it all seemed so dark. What would they have without trust? He loved her so much but was so afraid it wouldn't be enough to get them through this.

He ignored the pain and covered his face with his hand; silently crying for what this was doing to him and what it was going to do to all three of his kids.


	13. Chapter 13

Danny and Kono walked down the hospital corridor headed to Steve's room. They passed the waiting room and Kono stopped, pulling on his arm. "Hey, look over there."

Danny's phone went off and he ignored Kari sitting in the room alone. He pulled it out of his pocket, showing the screen to Kono, "Chin," he announced, walking away from her, "Hey, buddy, what do you got?"

Kari sat in one of the chairs, staring at the TV on the wall, but was clearly not watching it. The expression on her face was sad but more tired than anything else. She looked exhausted. She held a wad of tissue in her hand and it was obvious the night had been brutal to her.

Kono's first thought was of Steve's condition, hoping nothing had changed since they left the night before. She was almost afraid to ask judging by the look on Kari's face. She walked in, seeing her friend and not feeling the anger as much as she did the night before, "Kari," she called out, taking the seat next to her.

Kari looked over at her as if she were in a trance, seeing her friend and needing her more than ever; "He woke up."

"Good," Kono smiled, reaching over and taking her hand, "That's good news."

Kari shook her head, "He told me to leave, Kono." She put the tissue up to her face as fresh tears welled in her eyes.

She squeezed her hand, "He's just mad and probably hurting." She glanced over at Danny, still talking to Chin, "It was a rough day for all of us."

Kari shook her head, "No, he's so bitter." She looked up at her with fear in her expression, "What am I going to do Kono, if I lose him?"

That statement shocked her, never even giving that idea a thought. They were a solid couple, unbreakable, or so she had always thought. But there was a breaking point for every couple and by the tormented look on Kari; she feared that maybe they had stumbled on theirs. "Don't jump to conclusions. He'll probably wake up today and feel differently."

Kari turned to her, repeating his words that she had been saying over and over in her head for the past few hours as she sat there. "He told me to go home because he didn't want me here."

It was then that Kono noticed she was still wearing the same clothes from the night before. "Have you been sitting here the whole night by yourself?"

She bent her head and sniffed, nodding her answer.

Kono reached up, pulling Kari's head down on her shoulder, "It's going too be ok."

"I'm sorry for everything I did," she whimpered, "I'm so sorry."

She put her arm around her, "I know."

Danny came in and stood before them, "Chin said Conner caught up with Caldwell. He was at the airport trying to board a flight to the Philippines. Security called when his suitcase went through the scanner with a large sum of cash."

"Where is he now?" Kono asked.

"Conner took him home until we can decide what to do."

You're not going to arrest him? Kari blurted out.

Danny looked down at her, still irritated at their dilemma.

"Yes Kari, let's arrest him," he said angrily, "I'll run out and throw some handcuffs on him for obstructing justice," his voice became louder after every word, "and then I'll come back here and do the same thing to you!" He pointed angrily at no particular direction just using his hands because he was so annoyed with her. "If I arrest him I have to arrest you too! Is that what you want? Do you want Steve to wake up and find out that his wife is in jail? That's right, the head of the Governor's task force baby born in prison! Is that what you want?"

"Danny!" Kono yelled, standing up in front of him, "Knock it off!"

"You're going to defend her?" he motioned to Kari, "After everything that's happened?"

"She still needs our help," Kono defended

"She didn't want our help yesterday when we were offering it, what makes you think she wants it now?"

And there it was Kari thought, it was just as she had thought. It was ugly and venomous. It was even harder to see it coming out of Danny and focused solely on her, but it was her reality and there was no backing away or reason to defend herself, all she could do was just sit there and take it.

He looked down at her, really seeing her for the first time and instantly regretting his outburst. She looked so frail and torn down. He glanced at Kono and she too could see the regret all over his face. He took the seat next to Kari. "I shouldn't have said that, I'm sorry."

"You don't have to apologize too me Danny," she sighed, "I deserve anything you have to say. I put you all in danger yesterday." She used the tissue to wipe her nose.

"Maybe so, but I didn't have any right speaking to you like that in your condition. It was cruel and I'm sorry for it."

She heard his apology but knew it wasn't forgiveness for the day before. She knew that would take some time, but she felt that this was a step.

Danny knocked once before peeking his head into Steve's room, seeing that he was awake, "Are ya decent?"

Steve nodded, "What did you think was going on?" his voice raspy and tired. He laid his head back down on the pillow.

Danny walked over to the bed, "I didn't want to interrupt a sponge bath."

"You're funny," he replied somberly.

"You're not laughing."

"I'm not in a laughing mood."

Danny leaned over the bed with his arms resting on the raised bars. "How do you feel?"

Steve huffed, "That's a loaded question." He laid as still as possible. The last dose of pain medicine was wearing off and he wasn't sure when the next one would be coming. He was stiff and his chest hurt from when he raised his arm after Kari had left. He thought he might have torn a staple but wasn't ready to see the carnage under the bandage just yet. "My chest feels like someone hit me with a hammer."

"You look a lot better than you did last night."

"I'm not feeling much better." He didn't say it but he was feeling just as emotionally broken up as physically.

Danny could see the physical pain on his face, but he also recognized the emotional pain, wondering then why Kari was out in the waiting room and not in here

with him. "I saw Kari outside."

Steve shot him a look and then quickly winced, cursing himself for the sudden movement, "She's here?"

"Yes, sitting out in the waiting room."

He slowly turned his head, looking out toward the window of his room, "I told her to go home."  
"Hmm," he responded, not sure if he told her to go because he was worried about her, or because he was angry too. He was pretty sure by the look on his face that it was the later of the two. "Why did you tell her to go home?"

"I was afraid I might say something I'd regret."

"Did you?"

"Almost," he confessed, "That's why I told her to leave." The pain in his body was beginning to accelerate, "I'm so pissed at her Danny," He pushed his head into the pillow, "The thoughts that were going through my head…" he trailed off.

"I know, me too." I said some pretty harsh things to her out in the hall just now. I feel bad."

Steve glared at him, feeling that natural protective instinct kick in when it came to Kari. "What did you say to her?"

"Hey," he said, backing away, raising his hands in defense as if Steve might come off the bed at him if he didn't approve, "I apologized." He motioned with hands for him to relax, "Calm down or you're going to hurt yourself. I was mad," he defended himself, "I still am."

"I know," he calmed, feeling the next dose of pain medication that was automatically released into his IV. He felt light-headed and as the physical pain began to subside, the emotional strain began to get the better of him. "I really hurt her, but the worst of it is," he looked up at him, "at the time I didn't care."

"And now?" he asked, guessing that he was harboring some serious guilt over whatever it was he did say.

"I don't know." He was torn over the love he felt for her, but also the deep resentment for what she had done, "Look at me. I don't even know the details yet of my condition, except that the nurse told me I was doing well and I should expect to make a full recovery. But I don't remember anything after Chin took JD away. Everything after that is blank."

Danny looked down at the blanket covering his chest, remembering the bruises from the CPR that he and Kono had performed on him. He also remembered seeing his face as he laid there dying in front of him and how pissed off he was at him for giving up, wondering if maybe that anger had saved his life and caused most of the bruising. He didn't think it necessary to fill him in on the gory details. "It all happened pretty fast. The ambulance got there, loaded you up and took off. Kari was with you and I followed. Chin and Kono stayed behind and helped out HPD with JD and the bodies."

"JD, how is he?"

"He's good. The doctor brought him in to see you last night."

"JD was here?"

"Yes," Dr. Lind announced, entering the room, "and might I add that he is a delightful young man."  
They both looked over as she approached the bed. "Hello Commander, I'm Dr. Lind. I was the Surgeon on call last night when you were brought in."

"I guess a thank you is in order because the last thing I remember yesterday was having two bullets hit me, and I'm still here."

"It was a team effort," she glanced over at Danny, "wouldn't you say Detective Williams?"

Danny shrugged, "I have to get going." He put a hand on Steve's shoulder, "I hate hospitals almost as much as the beach, so I'm outta here."

"Hey," Steve said lazily, wanting to doze off from the medication that was quickly making its rounds through his system. "I need details."

"Details?" Danny asked.

"Of the case, I want to know what's going on."

Danny nodded only to appease him. He was pretty sure anything he told him in the next five minutes would be forgotten. He looked like he was struggling to keep his eyes open. "We'll talk later." He smiled at Dr. Lind, "Be careful of him Doc, he always thinks he's in charge, even when he's not."

"Hey!" Steve smiled, looking more and more like he was drunk "Don't get comfortable in my shoes, Danno! I'll be out of here in a couple of days." He looked at the doctor questionably, "right?"

She patted his hand, "That's right Commander, I'm not only a doctor but I'm a miracle worker too." She rolled her eyes at Danny as he opened the door to leave.

"You've been warned." He laughed at Steve's confused expression, "Later buddy."

She set down her computer pad and lifted the blanket off his chest.

"When do I get to go home?"

"Not for about a week. We need to make sure you heal properly and if I send you home too soon I can't imagine you will stay put, especially after what your partner just told me."

"Don't listen to him," Steve smirked, "he just wants me out-of-the-way."

She peeled away a corner of the gauze over his shoulder wound and carefully pulled it back, "If he wanted you out-of-the-way he wouldn't have almost broken one of your ribs giving you CPR."

"What?" Steve asked, shocked by the fact that he was that close to death and even more so that Danny had presumably saved his life twice that day.

"He and…" she stopped what she was doing, trying to remember, "Oh yes, Kono?" She looked at him, "Is that her name?"

Steve nodded, feeling humbled by what she was telling him, "Yes, Kono."

She removed the bandage and spoke to him as she examined his staples, "Your lungs filled with fluid before the ambulance got there and you were suffocating. Your heart stopped and the two of them performed CPR on you until the ambulance arrived." She smiled at him, "You're very lucky they knew what they were doing."

He stared straight at her, unaffected by the prodding and poking going on around his shoulder. This new information was unreal too him.

"Speaking of which," she pulled out her stethoscope from her pocket and put it on, "let's check those lungs, just breathe normally." She said, putting the flat end on the side of his chest just below his armpit.

"How long did they do CPR on me?"

"Shhh," she scolded him, moving it up and over toward his damaged lung. "Breathe."

He realized then that the pain was gone, taking in a deep breath.

"Don't over do it. I had them up your pain medication this morning. You may not feel it but your lung is still in a very fragile state." She put the gauze back over his shoulder and began to peel back his chest bandage. "My, my," she declared, making a serious face, "did you have a rough night? You tore one of your staples."

He laid still, knowing when he did it but not indulging it to the doctor. "You said my lungs filled with fluid. Did I get hit in the lung?"

"Yes, it grazed your left lung, but I repaired it. The bullet ended up inches from your heart, but it was easy to get at and did very little tissue damage. All in all Commander, you are very lucky. It could have been much worse. Instead of an open and shut surgery, it could have been an open-heart surgery. We went in prepared for something much more traumatic than what we actually found." She examined the area around the torn staple, "You should count your blessings today. That doesn't happen very often." She sighed, "I'm going to have to stitch that up." She gave him a firm look, "You sit still in this bed or I'll take that extra dose of pain medicine so you won't want to move."

"Yes ma'am," he promised.

He laid his head back, still not wanting to see the wound, especially after hearing what his body went through. He really had no idea it was that bad. He just didn't feel it and was beginning to have that same reaction throughout his entire body as the medication moved through him.

She laid the blanket back over him, watching the Morphine take full effect, "I saw your wife, Kari in the waiting room. Would you like me to tell her you're awake?"

He felt like his body was melting into the bed, everything in his world at that second was calm and he had never felt so relaxed. "Um," he blinked several times, trying to comprehend her question. He had mixed feelings about it, but couldn't quite remember why, "Wow," he murmured, "this stuff is…" he had lost his train of thought mid sentence and closed his eyes, picturing Kari after hearing her name. "Kari," he mumbled, "she's really pretty," he said, as if informing her of a fact that maybe she didn't already know.

"Nighty night." Dr. Lind smiled, picking up her computer pad. She added to her notes and left him to sleep.

Kari hesitated before following Kono inside Steve's room. She had convinced her that he would feel differently this morning. They met Danny as he came out. He took one look at her again and knew this whole ordeal was going to be hard on both of them.

"He's awake," Danny informed them. "The doctor's with him."

Kari took a step back, "I can't go in there," she shuttered, "after he sees what I did." She turned and began walking down the hallway to the elevators.

"Kari," Kono shouted.

Danny grabbed her as she went by, "I'm not so sure she should go in there either. He's loaded on medication and already told her once to go home. Let's not throw any fuel on the fire. Give him some time."

"Ok, but you need to lay off her too."

"My job right now is to try and keep her out of jail. We're going to have to manipulate the police report in order to do that." He shook his head, "This thing didn't end yesterday, Kono." He pointed with his thumb over his shoulder to Steve's room, "In the meantime I have to try to keep him at bay about the whole thing. He's got enough on his plate without this hanging over his head."

"Did you tell him about Caldwell?"

"No, not yet. He's pretty much out of it."

They both stepped out-of-the-way as Dr. Lind came out. "He's sleeping. I have to stitch up one of his staples that came out, other than that he's progressing nicely."

"Thanks Doc," Danny said appreciatively. He waited until she was out of hearing distance. "I need to get something together before the Governor gets wind of all this. He's going to want answers ASAP."

Kono ran her hand over her hair, shaking her head. "What about Caldwell? He's going to have to cooperate in all this."

"If he doesn't want to go to jail, he'll cooperate."

"I just hate the idea of him getting off when you know damn well he's the one that got her fired up about the whole thing, just for her money."

"Kari's a big girl Kono. She knew what she was doing, she just didn't take the time to weigh out the consequences."

Kono nodded apprehensively, knowing he was right, but what was done was done. She was still disappointed in her too, but when it came down to it, Kari was still one of her best friends and that meant more to her. She only hoped that Steve would feel the same. If they broke up it would kill the both of them. She just couldn't fathom that thought.

Kari sat in her car in the hospital-parking garage after Chin had driven it over from the construction site. She laid her head back in the seat wishing she could go back just twenty-four hours from then. But it was useless to think of that now. The damage was done and she was the sole proprietor. She had almost killed him. That thought played over and over in her mind and each time she thought it, the guilt would add another layer on to her conscience.

He had always been so good too her, even up to the last second when he risked his own life by giving her his protective vest. He didn't even hesitate because at that moment she knew his thought was that her life with the baby was more important than his. He loved her that much. It broke her heart that she had deceived him. The only thing she could be thankful for was that he hadn't died. She shuttered at the thought. She didn't know how she would have been able to live with herself and face their kids with the truth, that it would have been all her fault. She said a quiet prayer, thanking God for that. But now she was faced with an almost equal task, his forgiveness. She said another prayer for herself, that Steve would be able to somehow embrace what they had and move on, but after seeing the pain his body was going through and hearing the disappointment and anger in his voice that morning, she knew it was asking a lot, maybe too much. And she had no right to ask him for that. She would just have to wait and see if the damage done was going to be irreparable. In the meantime she would do as he asked and stay away. Just the sight of her had made him so upset, she didn't want to experience that again, not only for his well-being but for her own as well.

She put a hand on her stomach, feeling the life inside of her that moved. It was apart of him and she loved all her babies even more because of that reason. She remembered when she was just days away from being due with Casey, standing in the kitchen and feeling miserably uncomfortable and swollen. She felt his hands come from behind and caress over her belly. She could feel his smile without even looking at him. She leaned back against him as he kissed her neck, seductively.

"Steve," she groaned, "don't do that. I'm fat. I'm sweaty. I look like a giant beached whale. I don't know how you can even stand to look at me." She halfheartedly laughed.

He moved a hand up her to her throat, tipping her head back and kissed her from behind. Not just a quick trying to dissuade her attitude kiss, but a full-blown knock you off your feet kiss. She lifted her arm back, cupping his neck, enjoying it immensely. It lasted longer than one of their normal ones and with every second that ticked by she felt more and more desirable. He finally released her, brushing his lips along her cheek. "I can't help but look at you, because I see everything I've ever wanted standing right here in front of me, and it's beautiful." He nestled closer to her, "It's so beautiful." He wrapped both his arms around her, feeling her stomach again, "I'm in love with you Kari. Nothing will ever change that. Nothing, ever."

She put a hand on the steering wheel and bent her head, seeing the tears drip on her swollen belly. She prayed those words rang true, even now.


	14. Chapter 14

Danny and Chin stood in Robert Caldwell's home office, listening to him lay out the rules they should abide by in order for him to keep his mouth shut to the police about Kari's involvement.

"If you want my cooperation," he said callously, "then I want to be compensated for it."

Danny and Chin looked at each other, shaking their heads over his arrogance.

"Go on," Danny said, amused by him.

Robert sat in a leather chair behind his desk with his hands neatly folded in his lap. "I want to keep the money that I took from her. It was only half of what she took out of the bank, which I think is fair. In return, I will keep my silence about what happened that day."

"Only half huh," Danny acknowledged his request, nodding his head as if he were in agreement. He looked over at Chin, "What do you think? Does half of Kari's money seem like a reasonable deal too you?"

Chin crossed his arms, "Half," he laughed, "I thought for sure you'd ask for more than that. After all, you're preventing her from going to jail. She should reward you."

"Yes!" Robert exclaimed, "I'm glad you see it my way."

Danny walked around the desk rubbing his chin; "Hold on now," he said apprehensively, "let me see if I can sweeten that deal for you even more." He opened his arms out, smiling, "just for good measure of course."

Robert's eyes lit up, "OK, I'm listening."

"What if," he began, "now keep an open mind." He moved behind his chair. "What if you give her back ALL the money and I forget about what you just said."

Robert looked up at Chin, who stared down at him, not even blinking. He then looked over his shoulder trying to see Danny who was leaning on the back of his chair. "Don't think for a second that you scare me Detectives. I know you don't want her going to jail and if you don't cooperate with me, then I'll find a way to make sure that happens." He sat up feeling confident. "I think it's a fair deal."

He barely got the sentence out of his mouth before Danny leaned over, wrapping his arm around his neck, pulling up so he was out of his seat. "Are you threatening us, or should I say are you threatening Kari, because you have no fucking idea who you are dealing with." He yanked harder; choking him, "don't be so naïve Mr. Caldwell to think that we didn't do our homework on you. I know you're in bed with the mob out of Vegas. What do you think we're a couple schmucks with a badge?"

Chin put both hands on the desk and leaned over to him, "I'll tell you what the deal is going to be you piece of shit! You open up your mouth to anyone about what happened and not only will we throw your sorry ass in jail too, but we'll let it be known to your buddies in Vegas that you're willing to spill your guts about your business dealings to get a lighter sentence." He smiled ruthlessly, "How long do you think it will take for them to snuff you out?"

"You can't do that," Robert choked, pulling down on Danny's arm.

"You seem awfully nervous all of a sudden," Chin said, studying his expression with a slight grin, "Something you would like to get off your chest?"

Caldwell stared at him as panic began to set in. He wondered if they knew about the body buried in the cement. Even if they didn't, just a hint of word getting around to his partners in Vegas that he was involved with the police, would surely be serious trouble for him. He had no choice but to back down. "Alright!" he gasped, "Alright!"

Danny let go of him and turned his chair around, "That's not all." He bent over evading any personal space that Robert had, "If I find out you go near Kari McGarrett, if you try to contact her, hell if you park in the same lot as her, I swear to God I will come down on you so hard you'll wish you were in prison, because you'd be safer."

"We'll be watching you," Chin added, "others will be watching you. You're to blame for this whole mess. You tried to extort money from our friend when she was going through the worst experience of her life. We have no mercy for you whatsoever. She better never see or hear from you again or like Danny said, prison will seem like Disneyland compared to what we will do."

He breathed heavily, "Okay, okay. I understand," he pushed himself deeper into his chair to get away from Danny's threatening glare.

"I hope so, because it's really not even us you need to be afraid of. You stole from Commander McGarrett and put his family in danger. He's the one you should be afraid of. He's not as reasonable as we are." He walked around the desk joining Chin, "there's no telling what he might do."

Chin made an uneasy face, "I'm friends with the man and I certainly wouldn't want to be on his bad side." He chuckled, "You made a BIG mistake."

Danny smacked him on the arm, "Let's go. I think we've made out point."

"On behalf of the Honolulu Police Department," Chin smiled, "You have a nice day."

They left him sitting there still staring at them, not saying a word, but the look on his face appeased both of them. He would keep his mouth shut, that they were sure of.

Natalie Caldwell was standing in the foyer as they came out of the office. She only knew minor details of what had happened and had no idea of her husband's plans to depart the island.

Danny spoke to her as he walked toward the door, "He liquidated every penny you had and took Kari's ransom money as well. He was boarding a flight to the Philippines when we caught up with him." He gently touched her arm as he walked by, "I just thought you should know that."

She stared at them as they left unable to speak over that piece of information. She looked over toward the office as he sat in his chair, really seeing him for the first time in ten years. She thought of Bobby and knew enough was enough. She walked over to her cell phone sitting on the coffee table and dialed her best friend's number, whose husband also happened to be the top divorce attorney in Hawaii.

* * *

It had been two days and still no sign of her. She had been there he knew that. The doctor, the nurses, even Danny had told him. She just didn't want to come in. He missed her. He was with her everyday for almost six years. He hadn't thought about it before, but it was true. They hadn't spent a day apart that whole time, unless he was on a hard case, but even then he kept in contact with her and would try to find a way to stop at home, even if it was for a quick bite that she would have ready for all of them. It was a convenient excuse he could make to the team, but they all knew the real reason, after pulling an all-nighter he simply missed her and the kids.

Lying in that bed was driving him crazy. All he had to do was think. Think about why she had gone against him and been so easily manipulated by Caldwell. Sometimes he would let his thoughts get carried away, wondering if maybe there was more to it than he knew. But he quickly shook that idea off. Kari was faithful to him in that aspect. He would bet his life on it. She just wanted JD back so badly she went to any lengths to accomplish it. That's what he kept going back too. It was the only explanation. He wished now that he wouldn't have been so harsh with her, but at the time he was so angry with her. He closed his eyes, still seeing the hurt on her face as he went on and on berating her. "Oh God," he moaned, "no wonder she hasn't come back."

The door to the room opened and Governor Denning stepped inside, holding a bag. "Steve," he smiled, "is this an ok time?"

"Governor," he tried to push up with his hands to a sitting position, a natural habit of wanting to be at attention, but quickly dismissed that idea, "yes," he moaned, trying to hide the pain in his chest but it was impossible.

Governor Denning quickly put his hand up, "Relax, Commander. This isn't business and even if it was I think we know each other well enough that you don't have to be so formal after having two bullets removed from your chest. I understand if you don't jump up and salute me," he smiled.

Steve chuckled, "Yes Sir." He went back to the comfortable position he was in before.

"How are you feeling?"

"They keep me pretty comfortable." He pointed at the IV, "regular doses of sunshine."

The Governor laughed, "Well that's good to hear. I spoke with Danny yesterday after hearing what happened." He sat down in the chair by the bed. "I wish you would have come to me when this whole thing broke out."

"Yes Sir," Steve said, still unsure what Danny had told him. He knew that Kari was in danger of going to jail if things weren't handled delicately. He didn't want to lie to the Governor, but knew it was going to be inevitable. He just tried to play it off like he didn't know all the details yet. "The whole thing is kind of sketchy too me right now."

"I understand. We don't have to go into that anyway. It sounds like JD was in the wrong place at the wrong time and I'm just glad that he's safe and that you're going to be ok too." He glanced around the room, "I expected Kari to be here." He reached in the bag and pulled out a stuffed bear. "I brought this for the baby." He pulled out a similar pink one and then a Matchbox Camaro. "These are for Casey and JD."

Steve smiled, "Thanks, that was nice of you. Kari went home for a while." He lied, hoping he didn't run into her in the hall like everyone else supposedly had.

"I have something for you and Kari as well." He set the bag down and sat back in the chair. "I've arranged for a nurse to come to your house and look after you when you go home, just to help out."

"Wow, thank you Sir, but I really don't think that's necessary. I can manage."

"Honestly Steve," he said sheepishly, "it's more for Kari. She's pretty far along isn't she?"

"Yes Sir, she's due in about two and half months."

"Plus she has JD and Casey to chase after. I just thought some extra help might be," he shrugged, "helpful." He quickly raised his hand in defense, "Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying she couldn't handle it. Believe me, I'm sure she could. She's quite the go-getter when she sets her mind to it. She worked tirelessly on my campaign two years ago and still managed Ally's House and I'm sure she kept things at home in working order."

Steve listened to him rattle off Kari's accomplishments. All the qualities he just mentioned were the some of the same ideals that made him fall in love with her to begin with. It was probably also what drove her to do what she did with JD. She could be so stubborn at times. A word that had been thrown in his direction more times than he could count.

"So you'll take the help for Kari's sake at least? I don't want to pull rank on you Commander," he smiled.

"Yes Sir. I think she would appreciate that." He thought it an incredibly generous offer, but was also kind of looking forward to Kari taking care of him, but the Governor was right, she didn't need that extra workload right now and although he felt he could do a lot on his own, he didn't want to overdo it and end up back here in this bed. The whole alone thing was getting old fast. He missed JD and Casey and the commotion of a busy house.

"Good," he affirmed, pointing at the TV that was on mute. "Hey, turn to channel ten, the UH basketball game is on."

Steve reached over for the remote when the door to his room opened and JD peeked inside, seeing that it wasn't the same quiet dreary place he had been before. The Governor was there and his Dad was awake. He burst through the door, running up to the bed, "Hi Dad!"

"Hey Buddy!" He knew he missed him but didn't realize just how much until that second.

He hung on the bars of the bed, trying to lift himself up. The Governor came up behind him and lifted him up holding him over Steve. He reached for his father, giving him a kiss, not feeling the slightest bit embarrassed about it. He missed his Dad's presence in the house. It had only been a few days but to JD it was felt like months. The Governor pulled his chair over to the bed with his foot so JD could stand on it. He stared at the bandages on Steve's chest, knowing what was underneath. "Does it hurt Dad?"

"A little bit." He pointed at the IV, "The doctor puts medicine in there that helps take away the feeling."

"Dr. Lind," JD said knowingly. "I know her."

"I heard that," he said, putting his hand on JD"s back, "she said you came to see me the other night when I was asleep."

He nodded, pointing to Steve's finger with the ECG monitor on it, "That tells," he paused, looking at the machine on the wall trying to remember what it meant again, "it says that your heart is beating over there." He pointed at the screen.

"That's right," he chuckled, not seeing any change in him over what he had experienced the last few days. It was the same ole JD, but he knew down inside there were going to be issues. He had been through too much for there not to be. He only hoped that he and Kari could help him through it with minimal damage to him in the long run.

"I think you're about ready to go into surgery," the Governor laughed.

Steve was just about to ask JD where his Mom was when the door opened. He saw Maggie come in holding Casey and then waited with anticipation, but the door closed behind her. He felt a wave of disappointment; she wasn't coming.

Casey's face lit up as they approached the bed. She reached out for him, grabbing a hold of the steel bar.

"My goodness," Maggie said, almost dropping her.

Steve carefully moved his arm open, "Set her down right here."

"I don't think that's a good idea," Maggie said apprehensively, "she's excited and might hurt you."

"She'll be fine," Steve argued, missing his little girl.

She sat her down cross-legged and Casey stopped flailing, almost like she knew he was hurt. She put her tiny hand on his arm and sat still just content being there. "Dadda," she blurted out like she had just decided to let everyone else in the room know who he was.

"Talking!" the Governor exclaimed.

"And she's on the move too," Steve bragged, admiring the second love of his life, "she started walking a few weeks ago." He slowly reached up, touching her round cheeks with the back of his fingers, "Can Daddy have a kiss?" he puckered out his lips as Maggie took Casey by the body so she wouldn't fall over on him and leaned her into him. She put both her hands on his face and pressed her lips against his. He smacked extra loud and smiled, "Ahhh, that's just what I needed."

"Can I come up there too, Dad?" JD asked, feeling left out.

"Sure Buddy,"

Governor Denning lifted him up and set him down on his knees the opposite side of Casey, at the foot of the bed. He carefully crawled up so he was by his waist.

"When do you get to come home?" he asked, staring at the gauze bandages again.

"Not for a few more days." Steve replied, stroking Casey's back. She braced her hand on his arm and leaned forward, touching his mouth and drifting down his chin. He was covered with more whiskers than she'd ever seen. "Did you miss me?" he asked her, smiling at their little game. She pulled on the soft blanket over him, nestling it up to her face and stuck her thumb in her mouth, staring at him. He tickled her under the chin and she laughed, dropping the blanket and reaching her hand out to brace it on his chest.

Maggie quickly caught her, "Casey, no!" she pulled her back, which was not what Casey wanted. Her smile turned irritated and Steve held the blanket up for her again, "Lay her down on my shoulder," he moved his arm out a few inches.

"Steve," Maggie started to object when he cut her off.

"She'll be fine."

Maggie secured Casey's arms against her chest so she wouldn't reach out again and laid her down, resting her head on Steve's shoulder. He held her in place with his arm as she rolled over on her back, sucking her thumb with her blanket, perfectly content in the confined space up against her father.

* * *

Governor Denning left about half an hour later after watching an episode of Sponge Bob Square Pants with them. He enjoyed it more than he thought he would, planning on slipping out after the first commercial but became enthralled with the cartoon. A guy who lives in a pineapple under the sea would be the perfect spokesman for Hawaii, he joked. JD filled him in on the rest of the characters of the show as it played out.

Maggie looked up from her book as he left, waving at his departure. She came to the side of Steve's bed, looking down at a passed out Casey who slept soundly with her head against her Father's arm. Steve beckoned Maggie with his eyes not to move her. JD lay on the other side, sharing Steve's pillow flipping through the channels until he finally settled on another cartoon. The nurse had been in once and decided she could wait to change his bandages.

"Are you not going to ask about her?" Maggie inquired, eyeing him as she carefully laid the blanket over Casey's legs.

"I didn't want too in front of the Governor."

She agreed in her expression, but kept the gaze on him as if telling him, 'okay he's gone now, are you going to ask?'

He was almost afraid too, not sure how much Kari had told her about the last time they were together. "Is she here now?"

"No, not right this second," she replied sadly, "she thought it best not to come inside." She put her hands on the bars of his bed, giving him a verbal stare, "Isn't that the most ridiculous thing you have ever heard, Steven?"

She used his given name; it was then that he knew, Maggie was up on all the details. He motioned toward JD, "I don't think right now is a good time for this."

"You don't think they notice that she's not here," she said blatantly.

He looked away from her, "I don't think you know the whole story."

"I know enough to realize that your family is in jeopardy. Do you not see that?"

He looked down at JD again, "Maggie please. Not now." He knew JD was not paying them one bit of attention. He had learned like other five-year olds to block out the voices of adults when a cartoon was on, especially one he found amusing. Steve needed an excuse to avoid this subject with her. It still stung, and the things he said to Kari hung over him like a dark cloud. He appreciated everything Maggie did for their family and didn't think for a second that she was being intrusive. They had invited her into their lives on every level and he had no right to accuse her of butting in now, he just wasn't able to forgive and forget so quickly, especially after having the kids here with him. It made him think again how close they had come to losing him. He knew what it felt like to lose a parent at a much older age than the two of them, and he didn't wish that pain on anyone, especially two as young as they were. Casey never would have remembered him, and the new baby wouldn't even have known him, and just the thought of JD made him shutter. It would have changed who his little boy was forever. The same as it changed him when his Mother was killed.

It was a horrible mix of emotions and that plagued him, the trust issue more than anything else. Just when he would begin to understand Kari's rationalization, that same anger would rear its ugly head, and he would find disappointment in her all over again. He hated what it was doing to him and besides being locked up in that room, the distance between them wasn't helping.

"I don't want her to think she can't come here."

"She doesn't want to upset you. She knows what she did was wrong in your eyes."

"In my eyes?" he snapped, "No Maggie, what she did was wrong in everyone's eyes!"

JD turned his head toward Steve, distracted over the change in the tone of his voice.

Steve smiled at him, "What's this show about?"

JD went into a quick synopsis as Steve looked up at Maggie, apologizing for his outburst in his expression. He didn't want to make her feel bad, he knew she was just trying to help and loved Kari like a daughter. She just didn't understand how deeply it had cut him.

* * *

Kari sat outside his room, patiently waiting for Maggie and the kids to come out. She didn't want to rush them, knowing they had missed their Father. She stared at the closed-door from across the hall, wondering if this is how it would be from now on if he never forgave her. Would she always be on the outside looking in? They had so many wonderful memories as a family, all happy, filled with laughter and love. She couldn't believe he would give all that up to hold a grudge. But she knew men, and she knew him, although he was in a class all too himself in her eyes, he was still stubborn and hard-headed like any man she had ever met. Hell hath no fury than a man scorned, she sighed. '_They were just as bad as women_,' she thought. Nonetheless; it wouldn't be forgotten overnight, it would take some time and it would take some effort on her part to regain that trust that she had severed.

He was such an active person, so full of life and energy, which also was going to be hard to deal with. He wouldn't be able to move around and do the things he was used too for a long time. But she did know that she would do everything possible to help him recover once he came home. She was actually looking forward to taking care of him and having him rely on her.

She had spent the last two days preparing their bedroom for his arrival. She bought a new TV and pillows for his comfort and cleared the path from the bed to the lanai so he could easily get outside and sit in one of the new full-length lounges she had purchased. She moved Casey's changing table to the garage and just kept all of her diaper things in a wicker basket under her crib in JD's room. It reminded her again that the house was getting smaller and smaller as she continued to grow bigger. When the new baby arrived, it was going to make that house seem like a studio apartment. She wasn't sure how to pursue with the new home they had talked about buying. They had ventured out and looked at a couple but neither one of them had been able to agree on the layout, and they had promised each other in the beginning of the search that they both had to agree, or it was a 'no.'

Her thoughts were distracted when Maggie came out alone. She looked over at Kari with a saddened expression, making her way over to her.

"I thought you would be back by now. How long have you been out here?"

Kari pushed down on the ends of the chair, using them as a brace to stand up; she could have sworn this baby grew three inches over night. "Not very long," she lied. "How does he look? Is he in any pain?"

The concern on her face was heartbreaking to Maggie. It was she who should have asked those questions to her. "He seems comfortable. You should peek in and see them. The kids are asleep on the bed, it's so sweet."

Kari shook her head, "No, I don't want to upset him in front of the kids," but she missed him beyond belief.

"He's asleep too. He received a dose of pain medicine a little bit ago, it knocked him out cold."

Kari knew this would be the perfect opportunity to satisfy her craving for him. "Maybe I'll just peek inside," she said eagerly.

She slowly opened the door making sure first that he was actually asleep. She held the door until it closed all the way, so it wouldn't make any noise.

Maggie was right with her description of them. Casey laid on her back tucked under his arm with her thumb still sticking out but lying on his arm, like it had just fallen out of her mouth.

JD was on the other side with his head next to Steve's on the pillow, his hand still on the remote for the TV. She couldn't help but smile at that vision, seeing Steve fall asleep on the couch that way several times. "Like father like son," she whispered.

Steve looked peaceful and content, not at all the same as he did the last time she saw him. His head was turned toward JD's and they touched.

She missed being a part of that scene. The kids had slept with them on occasions during a storm or just for the heck of it. They would always lie between she and Steve and she could still recall seeing him looking at her and both thinking the same thing. 'How lucky are we?' A saying they used on a regular basis that never lost its significance. She wished she could feel that now.

She moved closer to the bed, looking down at him. Her heart began to race just being this close to him. She truly felt she was more in love with him now than she ever had been. She couldn't help herself and reached down, putting her hand over top of his, feeling the energy she got from him. It brought those relentless tears to her eyes as she moved her thumb over the back of his hand, wishing she could be lying down next to him. He felt warm and even as he lay there so weak and vulnerable she could still feel his strength. He was so strong.

She followed her hand as it softly glided up his arm coming to rest over the wound on his shoulder. It was then that she looked up and saw him staring at her. She froze not sure what to do. His eyes looked weary and she knew it was from the recent dose of medication. She wasn't even sure he was conscious of her being there until he reached through the bars, touching her stomach. She moved in closer for him, putting her hand overtop of his. She looked up at him again and his eyes were closed. She glanced over his head to the heart monitor and noticed his rapid heart rate decreasing dramatically as he drifted back to sleep.


	15. Chapter 15

Kari stayed behind Steve as the EMT's walked beside him into the house. He was slow-moving, still in a great deal of pain and had already refused for either one of them to physically help him.

"This isn't necessary," he argued for the tenth time. "I can walk by myself."

"Yes sir, Commander," one of them spoke up, trying to explain for the tenth time, "but our bosses were instructed by the Governor to make sure you…"

"Yes, I know," Steve stopped and held his hand up, "I get it, and I appreciate it. You guys have done a great job getting me home, but please, I can make it the rest of the way up to my room."

"Steve," Kari jumped in, "just amuse them please. It's only a little way further and then they'll be on their way." She rolled her eyes, shaking her head. '_Stubborn mule_,' she thought.

He looked over his shoulder, glaring at her. "Thanks for backing me up."

"You haven't been up walking around for a week, if you fell backward on the stairs do you really expect me to catch you?" She pointed with both hands at her swollen belly. "Who's going to back me up?" she motioned to the two men to continue whose faces became uncomfortable, knowing they were in the middle of what seemed like a husband and wife fight. "Carry on gentlemen."

She could hear Steve huff and by his walk she could also tell he was fuming. It had been probably the longest conversation they had had for five days. The hospital visits were uncomfortable to say the least. She thought maybe he had forgiven her after the one night he had actually reached out and touched her. She had stayed there in the room, holding his hand on her stomach and just watching him. It was peaceful and comforting, until out of nowhere JD began to whimper in his sleep and before Kari could even reach out to him, he began to scream and flail around. Steve woke up immediately as well as Casey.

It turned from quiet to chaos in a matter of seconds.

She had managed to get control of his arms as he yelled out for his Dad over and over.

Steve tried to fight off the medication that left him fuzzy and at the same time comfort JD and catch his daughter before she fell. He looked up at Kari, a little startled to see her, "Take Casey!" he said, not able to get a grip on her.

She had begun to cry and was trying to stand up, holding on to the bars. If she succeeded she would have fallen over, head first to the floor.

Kari reached over him and snatched her up, holding her with one arm and trying to control JD's fearful tantrum with the other. Steve managed to get an arm around him and hold him down. His eyes were open but he seemed confused about where he was. His little face was contorted into a frightened expression that sent a chill through Steve.

"JD!" he tried to say it calmly but was feeling his son's panic, "JD! It's okay buddy," he held him tightly, ignoring the painful pressure against his chest.

"Da…daddy!" he yelled out. His voice quivering, "Daddy?"

"It's alright JD, Daddy's right here." Steve knew it was a bad nightmare; he hadn't called him Daddy since before Casey was born.

He pushed away from his father, gasping for air, "There were…lots…and lots," he paused putting a hand on Steve's chest, "lots of bullets." His face contorted as he recalled his dream and began to cry again. "The bullets were all over you." He flashed back to the blood that covered him, just like it was when he was shot for real, only this time he witnessed the bullets hitting him in his dream.

"It was just a dream JD," he tried to reassure him.

"Nooo," JD cried, "it was real!" he laid his head on Steve's sore shoulder, putting his arm across his chest.

Kari got Casey calmed and put her hand on his back, "It's okay honey, don't be afraid. The bad feeling will go away, remember?"

"This has happened before?" Steve asked her, confused and slightly annoyed.

Kari continued to rub his back, "Yes, twice now."

"Jesus Kari," he snapped, "What are you doing about it?"

She glared at him, hearing that accusation in his voice all over again. "The best that I can Steven!" She was a good mother and refused to stand there and let him berate her again over JD's nightmares. Steve didn't know it, but it wasn't the first time JD had experienced these types of dreams. He had a couple over the last year; she just didn't want to upset Steve by telling him. She knew he would feel guilty over it and she wanted to protect him from that.

JD lifted his head, "My tummy hurts," he whimpered.

"Do you feel sick?" Kari asked. He had never been this upset before.

He nodded, sitting up.

Kari quickly set Casey down on the floor. She stumbled and fell backwards on her butt, still feeling a little disoriented from waking up so suddenly, but she sat there content.

"Has he got sick before?" Steve asked.

Kari ignored him and focused on JD. She reached over, picking him up and set him down, walking with him quickly over to the bathroom. "Its alright JD."

Steve pushed the button on the bed, raising it up to a sitting position so he could see Casey. It was the first time he'd sat up since being hurt. He put his hand over his shoulder bandage, feeling the lingering pain from the pressure of JD.

"Hey," he called down with a scratchy voice, getting her attention.

She pushed herself up off the floor and reached up taking his hand that he held down through the bars. He looked over toward the bathroom and could hear Kari talking but hadn't heard JD throw up yet, which was good.

Casey took his hand and bit his finger like he always playfully did to her.

"Ouch," he said, looking down at her pleased expression, "Don't bite me," he scolded her with a wink.

She let go of his hand and raised her arms, "Up!" she demanded.

He shook his head, "I can't sweetie."

She reached higher, "Up Dadda!" She grabbed the side of the bed and tried to lift herself.

"No Casey."

She began to whine when he pushed his blanket through the bars to her. She pulled on it falling to her butt again, laughing as it landed on her head.

"Where did Casey go?" he said, still watching the bathroom door and trying to keep her amused.

She pulled it off her head, laughing even harder. Her bleach blond hair stuck up in different directions.

"Is he okay?" he called out to Kari. He waited impatiently for an answer that never came. "Kari!" he yelled, wanting an answer.

"Yes," she replied in the same-snipped tone as his.

"Okay," he mumbled, "I was just asking."

"And I was just answering," she said coming out of the bathroom, holding JD's hand.

"Is this the way it's gong to be from now on?" he grumbled.

"I don't know Steve, you seem to set the tone lately."

"So it's my fault?" he replied defensively.

"Well you seem to be angry at me for him being sick and that's certainly not my fault."

"He's having nightmares about the shooting!" He didn't say she was to blame directly, but she got the point anyway.

"Your job has him frightened, Steve. This has happened a couple of times over the past year. So don't play dumb with me and pretend that you don't see it."

"Why didn't you tell me that he was having nightmares?"

She ignored the question and bent over helping Casey stand up. She took the blanket and put it back on the bed.

He hated that she was avoiding the answers, "What else haven't you told me? What other little secrets have you kept from me."

"Oh that's right Steve," she mocked him sarcastically, "I have so many secrets." She put her hand on her chest, "My life is just one big mystery to you."

"Over the last week, yes! I'm seeing a whole side of you I've never seen before. Going behind my back, keeping things from me about the kids. It makes me wonder what else you're keeping from me." The words just kept coming. His mouth was like a leaky faucet that just wouldn't shut off.

She held Casey's hand and started over toward JD when his next statement floored her.

"I keep going over why you were so quick to join forces with Caldwell over me. Something there you're hiding too?"

She could feel the blade being stuck in her back with his words. She couldn't believe that he was accusing her of that. He was never going to forgive her. She felt that every argument they had was always going to revert somehow back to her actions that day. She turned to him, "Is that what you think?" she wanted to slap him, "Is that really what you think of me?"

He knew that last statement was harsh and he didn't believe it himself. He knew it was wrong to say, especially after the look on her face. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean that," he tried to backtrack, "I know you wouldn't…"

"Really?" she snapped. His apology meant nothing to her it was too late. "You said it, so you must be thinking it! You know why I went behind your back? Because sometimes talking to you is like talking to a brick wall. Our relationship works like clockwork as long as you call the shots, Commander!" She knew that would irritate him. It was payback for the Caldwell comment.

"Oh please," he defended, "Spare me the Seal bullshit! Poor Kari, your husband is such a prick."

"And what Steve, your wife is a whore?"

"I said I was sorry for that?" he yelled.

"Oh thank you so much," she snickered, "your heartfelt apology meant the world too me."

Neither of them noticed JD or Casey staring at them in confusion. This display between their parents was alien to them.

"What do you want me to whip up a few tears for ya Kari, and then all will be forgiven, just like you."

"That's right Steve, hold on to that grudge," she battled back, "I hope it keeps you warm at night."

"What is going on in here?" Maggie interrupted, looking at the two of them as if they were strangers. "I can hear you out in the hall."

"We were just leaving," Kari said angrily.

"And if the attitude sticks, don't bother coming back."

"I wasn't planning on it."

"Stop it!" Maggie ordered, gritting her teeth and trying to keep her cool in front of the kids. She took a stunned JD by the hand, leading him over toward the bed. "Say goodbye to your Dad." She tried to sound pleasant for JD but both Kari and Steve heard the anger in her voice.

JD stood at the side of the Steve's bed staring up at him. The nightmare was long forgotten and replaced with bewilderment over the mean way in which his Mom and Dad spoke to one another. He'd heard arguments between them before, but nothing like that. It all seemed to have started when he felt sick. "Are you mad at me too?" he looked up at him.

"No JD," he replied quickly, "of course not."

He looked at his Mom, "Why can't we come back anymore?"

"We can," she assured him, refusing to make eye contact with Steve.

"But you said…"

"JD," Steve corrected him, "its fine. You can come back again."

"I'll bring you tomorrow," Maggie said sweetly, giving Steve a look.

Kari stood off to the side, embarrassed over their loud argument but even more mortified that it happened in front of the kids. It had escalated so quickly she wasn't even sure when. Their relationship had shifted in a direction that was foreign to both of them. Worse yet, neither of them was aware of the difficult struggle to repair the damage when distance was allowed to exist in a marriage.

* * *

JD came in the house ahead of Steve and the EMT's, seeing Maggie standing in the kitchen holding Casey.

"Guess what Maggie? I got to ride in the amblance with Dad!"

"How exciting for you," she smiled.

"Ambulance JD," Kari corrected him.

"Amb…lance." He tried to say again but couldn't quite master it.

Kari ignored the second attempt, walking over to get Casey. "Was she good?"

"Always." She looked past her to Steve, "Welcome home."

"Thanks Maggie, but I got less attention while I was in the hospital." Commenting on the two men beside him, "The Governor is going a little overboard."

"He's just being extra cautious and generous." Kari reminded him.

"Oh yeah," Steve said, making his way up the stairs, "by the way, the Governor is sending over a nurse to help take care of me."

"What?" Kari said shocked, "What do you mean?"

"What do you mean, what do I mean? He's sending over a nurse like I said."

The irritated tone of his voice told Maggie that they still hadn't made up from the other day. Kari had stayed true to her word and hadn't gone back to the hospital until that day. She wanted so much to tell them both they were making a mistake but knew it crossed the line so instead she said nothing.

"You're just telling me this now?" she huffed.

He got to the top of the stairs and looked down at her, "And when would have been a good time to tell you Kari?" he scowled, "it's not like I've seen much of you lately."

"You told me not to come back," she said matter-of-factly.

"That's not what I said."

"Oh yes Steve, it was!"

"Please!" Maggie jumped in, shaking her head. "I'm taking the kids next door for some ice cream while you two settle yourself." She took Casey from Kari's arms and set her down, taking her hand. "Come on JD."

He went willingly, not wanting to see another argument like the day in the hospital. She opened the backdoor and they both held Casey's hand as she carefully made her way down the steps to the yard. "Why are they mad?" he asked her.

"I don't know honey." They made their way over to Maggie's yard, "Sometimes grownups argue over silly things." She tried to get his mind off of it, "How about a banana split with extra whip crème?"

JD looked up at her with wide eyes, still holding Casey's hand, "Yes!" he bent over to his little sister, "Casey, do you want ice cream?"

She got more excited over the tone of his voice rather than what he was saying. She was finding out lately that JD was a great source of excitement when they were together. He would always give her bites of his treats or try to make her laugh. "No!" she yelled out.

JD looked up at Maggie, "I think that means yes. She always says no even when she means yes."

Maggie chuckled, "I think you're right. You're a good brother JD."

Kari watched them walk out the door and looked back upstairs as the two men came down and Steve had disappeared into the bedroom.

"Thank you so much for everything." She looked uneasily at them, "I'm sorry about all that."

"Its okay ma'am," one of them said as they made their way to the door.

"Do you know anything about this nurse coming over?" she asked.

"No ma'am." The other one replied, "You have a nice day now."

"Thank you. You too." She closed the door behind them, sighing, walking back toward the stairs but hesitating before going up.

Steve came in the bedroom after dismissing the two men and immediately noticed the changes. There was a new TV on the dresser and the bedspread was new. The clutter from Casey's things was all gone and out on the lanai there looked like new furniture as well. She had gone out of her way to make it comfortable for him. He carefully sat down on the bed, wincing from the soreness in his chest. He didn't have that trusty pain medication being pumped into him when needed and he was beginning to miss it. He glanced toward the bathroom and knew a shower was going to be his first order of business.

He wondered if she were going to come up but guessed that she probably wouldn't. The last few days had been bitter and depressing. He was more than anxious to get out of that hospital room, it was becoming like a tomb. He looked around at his new place and decided that even though it was home and made to be welcoming for him, it didn't feel joyous or relaxing. The tension between them was mounting and the arguing in front of the kids had to stop. She had to have recognized it too, besides he thought, Maggie might file for custody of the kids, if they didn't knock it off.

At times he missed her so much, part of him felt lost without her companionship. It had been over a week since he had told her he loved her. After saying it everyday for the past six years, it was the biggest thing he was missing from his life at the moment and it hurt.

He sat on the bed for a couple more minutes just waiting to see if she would come up. But the longer he waited the more and more it felt like a rejection. She must not have missed him in the same way, if she had at all. It was silent downstairs and he assumed she had gone next door with the kids. He pushed himself up and headed to the bathroom.

He turned the shower on and unbuttoned his shirt, shifting his shoulders so it fell off of him, groaning from the stretching of his wounds that were still healing. The tape covering the gauze took some his chest hair as he peeled off the bandages. He slipped off the sweat pants he had on and went to get in the shower when he passed by the mirror. He stopped catching a glimpse of his reflection, not having seen the scars in full view before. He held his breath at the sight of his torso. It was worse than he had thought.

Kari slowly made her way up the steps after hearing the shower come on. This whole thing was getting out of hand. The fighting in front of the kids had to end. She knew a lecture from Maggie was well deserved. She didn't know what she was going to say to him, and just that thought alone made it all seem so backwards. A little over a week ago they were happily in love, and between then and now they had said such horrible things to one another. She feared that if it went on too much longer that some of it might not be repairable. That frightened her. She was angry with him, more so than she had ever been, but she didn't want to lose him either. She loved him.

She came in the bedroom, looking around but didn't see him. As she came around the bed she saw him standing naked in the bathroom, staring in the mirror. She could see his reflection and saw what he saw.

There was a lot bruising around both wounds, but it was the dark red welts that were still stapled shut that was the most apparent. The shoulder wound was three inches long and ran parallel to his collarbone. It almost perfectly matched the one on his left side were he had surgery almost six years earlier from tearing a tendon, trying to get Kari out of that garage and away from Sergius. It was painful and sore looking, but was in no comparison to the one that ran down the center of his chest.

She watched as he lifted his hand, touching the carnage over his lung. He seemed just as shocked by it as she was.

Steve stood staring at his body feeling a sharp pain in his lung that appeared only because his mind told him what he was seeing had to be painful, so it was. He had other scars but nothing like this. He was never the type of man who was concerned with his looks or his body image. He'd naturally been blessed with both but never reveled in it. This was the first time he'd ever felt self-conscious about how he looked or how people were going to perceive him.

He ran his fingers over the twelve staples that began just below his breastbone and ended close to his naval, touching the elevated wound that looked like something out of a horror movie. He didn't want JD or Casey seeing this. He made a mental note to have a shirt on at all times. He was afraid it would frighten them; hell, it frightened him.

He knew it was going to be a long time before he could swim or run again. He didn't realize just how bad it was until he made it to the top of the stairs, just that little bit of exertion left him winded. It was going to change the way he looked and the way people would look at him. He lived in Hawaii where shirts were an option, and he exercised that privilege a lot, especially around the house. Again, that self-conscious anxiety hit him, what would Kari think of them? All he could imagine at that second was making love to her and her having to see or feel this. It scared him to think that she wouldn't look at him in the same way. She was so physically consuming with her hands when they were together, always caressing his chest and kissing him. He was sure that would end. Jesus, it was on his body and he could barely stomach it.

The steam from the shower made its way to the mirror; he turned to grab a towel off the rack and saw her standing there; staring at him, mistaking her concern for something else. It only took a second for him to confirm what he had been afraid of, it was written all over her face. He stepped back out of view and slammed the door shut. The timing couldn't have been worse.

She saw what he saw but not in the same way. She was focused on the scars but only saw them as a reminder of how close she came to losing him. The reality of that would hit her sometimes with no warning, like now. It left her dazed. Not one time as she stood there, did she see him as anything but the perfect man she had fallen in love with.

"Steve," she called out after seeing his reaction to them too, "Are you ok?" She knocked on the door, trying the handle but it was locked, "Steve?"

"What?!" he said abrasively from the other side. He didn't necessarily blame her for looking at him like that. It was shocking, but he just didn't need to see it first hand and he certainly didn't want to open the door and see it again.

"Open the door." She pulled on the handle again and knocked, "Steve, please let me in."

"Jesus Christ Kari!" he yelled, punching the door with his palm, "Just back off!" he tried to tone it down, but the damage was done. "I'm fine, I just want to take a shower." He winced from the pain in both his hand and his shoulder. He stood staring at the door, wondering what else was going to come between them? He felt like every time they turned around there was something else pushing them further apart.

He leaned his head against the door, wanting her.

Kari jumped back, covering her mouth with her hands in shock. She didn't know how to react to that outburst. He'd never physically lost his temper like that with her before. At first she thought maybe she had pushed him too much, wanting to blame herself, but that wasn't it. The truth was they were in a very difficult place in their marriage right now. She knew it was naïve to think that it would never happen. She just had to rely on the foundation they had created, hoping would it hold steady and keep them together. She loved him so much. She just didn't know where the man she fell in love with disappeared too.

"Alright," she said, giving him the space he obviously wanted from her. She wondered if that was the idea behind the nurse as well. She was stunned that he had arranged that without talking to her about it. He would rather have a stranger taking care of him than her. That was hard to swallow and stung. He had to have known it would make her feel this way, but obviously didn't care. She could feel that first crack in the foundation as she made her way back downstairs.


	16. Chapter 16

Steve woke up early that morning, just before the sunrise. He could see it making an appearance on the lanai and went to make his way out there to watch. As he got off the bed he felt that familiar ache for her that was really starting to get on his nerves. He didn't like that it was becoming familiar. She was only about twenty feet away in JD's room and he didn't even feel he could go to her. They were living in this house separately.

He slowly sat down on the new lounger feeling the lack of medication in his system from the long night. It was hard to sleep on his back too when he'd been sleeping on his stomach his whole life.

He woke up several times during the night and each time he did, Kari was his first thought, no matter if it was only for a couple of seconds and then replaced with something new, she was first. He stretched out on the thick cushioned chair and decided it was the most comfortable he'd felt in a while. She'd done well buying this. Maybe he'd sleep out here the next night.

The sun peeked over the Pacific to the left of the beach through the trees, and even though he couldn't see it directly; he could feel the breeze coming off the ocean begin to get warmer. He closed his eyes and breathed in the scent of Hawaii, letting it penetrate through his lungs, feeling the magical effect it could have on a healing body.

He opened his eyes and looked down on the yard, suddenly taken back six years, picturing Kari after her first night in his house sitting in the grass, looking up as the morning sun poured over her, and then recalling their food fight that ended up in the backyard. He smiled looking out toward the beach where he had carried her over his shoulder, both of them covered in whip crème and ketchup, and then thrown her in the water. They crawled back up on the grass and lay there until they dried off, just talking and laughing. That night was the beginning of what would lead him into the best decision he had ever made, and that was to make it a real marriage. It was supposed to be for only one year, and here they were six years and three kids later, and not one time had he ever regretted the decision. She was an incredible mother to his kids and he couldn't have dreamt up a better wife for himself.

His smile slowly faded as he compared it to the present day. He laid his head back wondering then how they ended up where they were at the moment, so far apart.

He thought about what she had said at the hospital, about him being too stubborn and her not being able to confide in him. He had always taken pride in the fact that they had such an open communication between them, but as he sat there he began to wonder if maybe over time it was her doing most of the listening and he wasn't doing enough. That thought didn't sit well with him. All this time he had been blaming her, but maybe he should have been listening instead.

He ran his hand over the thick stubble on his face, stepping into her shoes and seeing for the first time how it looked from her eyes.

"Twice," he recalled, "twice she came to me for forgiveness and I never listened to her." That startling realization was a devastating blow to his role as her husband and best friend. He felt the weight of her burden that she'd been carrying around all week shift to his shoulders, and it was unbelievably heavy.

* * *

Kari came in the bedroom carrying a plate with Steve's breakfast, some OJ and two pain pills. She saw he wasn't in bed and then noticed the French doors to the lanai were slightly open. He sat out on one of the new lounge chairs. It was the first time she noticed that he had actually gone out there.

The last couple of days since he'd been home had been altogether quiet. He spent most of the day watching TV or playing games with JD. She had purposely let him stay home from school that week so he could be with his Dad. It was also a way for her to avoid any real confrontation with Steve. The arguing in front of the kids was not good for anyone. Maggie had made that point clear to both of them in separate conversations. They took the tongue lashing because they both knew she was right. She had been a godsend for them, bringing over dinners and helping Kari with the kids. They owed her so much, no matter how many times she confirmed that she loved doing it and they owed her nothing.

The nurse that the Governor had arranged was going to come over that day to check on him and bring more medication. She was suppose to arrive the same day Steve had come home, but with the extra tension around the house it wouldn't have been the most comfortable place to have a stranger walking around, so when they called for confirmation, Kari pushed the day forward to give them all time to settle in. She still didn't want this person coming over, but after finding out it was a gift from the Governor, she felt obligated.

The difficult part had been their sleeping arrangements. She and Steve didn't have a large bed and it had never been an issue in the past, but with her being pregnant and feeling like she was growing daily, she didn't want to hurt him if she rolled over in her sleep, or at least that was her excuse for the time being, the truth was, she wasn't so sure she would get any sleep being next to him the way things were. So instead she sent JD to Maggie's and she slept in his room with Casey.

"Good morning," she said in a monotone voice, coming out on the lanai, wondering how this day was going to end up.

He was stretched out on the lounger in cut-off sweats and a T-shirt, looking over his shoulder at her, "Good morning," he replied smiling. It felt odd being up for so long and only seeing her for the first time. The sleeping arrangements were not appealing too him but after his outburst a couple of days earlier and his newest revelation from that morning, he really couldn't blame her. He felt he should be down in the doghouse, if they had one.

"Are you hungry?" she asked, handing him the OJ and dropping the pills in his hand. His beard was at least a week old. She'd never seen it that full before, wondering if this was something new or just him feeling lazy. The upbeat tone of his voice didn't get by her without being noticed either.

He looked up, making eye contact with her, "Sure, I could eat, thanks." He popped the pills in his mouth, taking a drink of juice.

She set the plate of food on his lap and felt the baby kick at the same time, "Oh my gosh," she jolted almost spilling it.

"You ok?" his voice concerned, instinctively reaching out taking her by the arm and catching the plate at the same time.

"Yes," she chuckled, "I had some orange juice earlier and the babies pretty hyper now." She looked at his hand, not being able to recall the last time he had touched her.

"I remember when Casey would do somersaults over OJ," he smiled, "maybe it's a girl."

Kari felt another kick but it took backseat to the rapid beat of her heart from how much pleasure she was taking in this conversation with him. It was literally the longest and most pleasant they had been to each other in a long time. She put her hand over the spot, "I think I feel a foot."

He reached up and she took his hand, moving it to the exact place. They both held still, waiting. He looked up, seeing that beautiful glow emanating from her. Her hair was up in a ponytail and she had no visible makeup on, but she was still the most stunning creature he had ever laid eyes on. He was caught up in the moment when he felt a punch against this palm. "Whoa!" he laughed, "that was a good one!"

Kari giggled, "I told you, it's the juice, but by the kicking strength, maybe it's another boy."

God he missed these relaxed conversations with her. "It's strong and healthy that's for sure," he said, moving his hand over the spot.

"Momma!" Casey yelled from the other room and then squealed just for good measure, to let everyone know she was up.

They looked at each other and laughed.

"Queenie is up," Steve announced.

"You better eat that before it gets cold," she pointed at the plate.

She went to walk by him and he reached out for her arm, gently pulling down on it and looking up at her. "Kari." He said her name as if apologizing without actually saying it. His eyes mirrored his voice and both were undeniably genuine.

She knew what he wanted and delivered upon request, only because she saw in him what she had been asking for all week, forgiveness. She bent over and kissed his lips that were reaching up to her. It was quick, but it felt amazing being in this place again. She went to pull away and he held firm.

"I'm sorry if I haven't been listening. I'll work on that."

He was taking part of the blame; just that simple little phrase meant the world to her. She didn't know what had happened overnight and didn't ask; the love of her life had reappeared. She nodded with a heartfelt smile and then playfully rubbed his whiskers, "Casey probably loves these."

"What about you?" he smiled.

She tilted her head, studying him. "It makes you look different."

"Different bad, different good?"

She put her hand on his shoulder, "I don't think you could ever look different bad, Steve."

Casey yelled again, demanding attention.

Kari rolled her eyes, "Can you just imagine her at fourteen?"

"Bring her out here with me. I'll give her some of my breakfast." He turned and watched her waddle through the bedroom. Her compliment on his appearance was an ego boost he needed after dwelling on the scars over the last couple of days. The smell of bacon from his plate hit him and after not having an appetite for the last week, he suddenly felt famished. He related it to the stress between he and Kari. His stomach had been in knots and the thought of putting food in there just wasn't appealing, but it disappeared with the kiss. He looked down at his plate and knew it wasn't going to be enough.

* * *

JD came in through the backdoor like a tornado. "Hi Mom!" he said, running by, slamming the door behind him.

"Where are you going in such a hurry?" she asked, "especially without stopping and giving me a kiss good morning."

He stopped suddenly before hitting the stairs and ran back over to her, hugging her quickly around the waist, unable to get his arms even halfway around her anymore. "Dad is outside on the new chairs with Casey," he blurted out, "I want to go sit with them."

"Here," she said, reaching for a bottle, "take this to him."

He took the bottle and ran up the stairs. She smiled at his excitement as Maggie came in through the door.

"Good morning," she said with a sheepish grin, "I just had a pleasant conversation with your husband outside."

Kari leaned against the counter, "That makes two of us."

Maggie raised an eyebrow, "Really?"

"Yes. It was kind of strange now that I think of it. We didn't actually apologize to each other, but it was more like a truce." She raised her finger, "Although he did say he was sorry for not listening to me more." She shrugged with a nice smile, "I don't know, but whatever he's feeling, it's working for me so I'm just going to go with it, because frankly, I can't take this separation anymore, it's horrible."

"Alleluia," she rolled her eyes, "you two were about to give me an ulcer."

"I'm sorry about all that, Maggie. That you were stuck in the middle."

She smiled and gently touched her arm, "That's almost exactly what he said." She walked back over to the door, "All is well again! Let's keep it that way. I'm going over to Barbara's for cards today so I won't be around."

"Ok," Kari waved as she walked out, "Have fun."

She looked toward the stairs hearing JD laugh, enjoying that sound in her home again. It was turning out to be a pretty good day.

* * *

The nurse arrived at exactly 10:00 am just as scheduled. Kari dropped the clean clothes on the kitchen table and went to the door.

The petite native Hawaiian girl smiled, showing off her perfect teeth with enthusiasm.

"Hi, Mrs. McGarrett?" she stuck her hand out to Kari, "I'm Keilie. The hospital sent me over."

Kari shook her hand surprised at her young age. She wasn't expecting Mary Poppins in the form of a young girl that was just as beautiful all around as her smile. She wore a pair of designer jeans that Kari had heard of, but never would have felt comfortable wearing at her age, but they fit the young woman just perfectly. Her T-shirt had a picture of Lady Gaga on it that she must have purchased from the recent concert at the Blaisdell arena a couple of weeks ago. "Hi Keilie, it's nice to meet you. Please come in." She moved out-of-the-way from the door allowing her access. "You can call me Kari."

"Wow! Great Ocean view!" she said making her way straight into the kitchen, looking out the window. She carried a white bag with medical markings on the outside. Kari assumed this was the medication, but wasn't so sure she trusted her giving it to Steve.

"Thank you. So how long have you been a nurse?"

Keilie turned to her. "Actually I took it a step further. I just graduated from Stanford Medical School last semester. I'm back on the island doing my internship over at Queen's Medical Center." She snapped her fingers; "I forgot to introduce myself at Dr. Matzu." She laughed shaking her head, "I'm not used to that yet."

"Oh!" Kari said surprised, "That's a big accomplishment. Congratulations!"

"Thanks!" she smiled, "When are you due?"

Kari looked down at her inflated belly and suddenly forgot everything. "Umm," she felt like her brain was oozing out of her ear from standing next to this beautiful, bright and talented girl that she mistook for a bubble-head.

"You look about seven months." Keilie answered for her.

"Right," Kari nodded, feeling ridiculous, "I am, only about two months to go."

"Well congratulations to you too," she smiled, picking the bag back up, "So where's the patient?"

"Upstairs," she pointed and began to make her way up. She rolled her eyes at herself as she climbed the steps, feeling like an idiot. She walked in the bedroom and they were still out on the deck. "Steve," she called out, "The nurse…" she stopped and turned to Keilie, "Sorry." She came out to the lanai, "Dr. Matzu is here."

She took Casey from his lap as he sat up, swinging his legs around. He carefully pushed himself up, groaning from the pain.

Keilie stood at the foot of their bed smiling brightly, "Well the beard is new, but the rest of you looks the same, give or take a foot in height."

Steve stared at her, trying to decipher who and what she was saying. He looked at Kari but her face was just as confused.

"I'm sorry," he said, still trying to determine if he knew her.

"Oh my God, you used to bang my head on the ceiling and now you're going to tell me you don't remember me."

Steve's mouth dropped open, "Keilie?"

She smiled even brighter, "That's me!"

Steve laughed as he made his way to her, "Wow! Look at you, all grown up."

She walked up to him and very carefully put one arm around him, knowing of his injuries, as he did the same to her.

"Look at you," she chuckled, "all shot up!"

He laughed even harder, clutching his shoulder, "Still a smart ass. I hope you brought me pain medicine with that lame joke."

She unzipped the bag that was on the bed, pulling out a prescription bottle, "Two every four hours, or as needed for pain." She pulled them back, pointing a finger at him, "Don't over do it, they're addicting and I won't get them refilled if you go through them like candy."

"Are you a doctor or just going to be a pain in my ass like you used to be?"

"Both," she laughed, "and you loved me! You were the only one of my brother's friends that put up with me."

He pictured the mouthy eight-year-old tomboy that used to follow him around, taunting him until he'd pick her up and playfully bang her head on the ceiling. It eventually became a game between them, and he found out he enjoyed it as much as she did. He was seventeen at the time, still living in LA, not long before he joined the Navy. Keilie and her family had moved there from Hawaii and Steve and her brother Max had hit it off immediately, both knowing what it was like to be dragged way from home to a strange place as a teen. And LA was like a foreign country to both of them, compared to the islands.

He motioned toward Kari, "You met my wife Kari."

"Sure did, and who are these two little munchkins?" she said, taking Casey's hand and knowing just where to touch in her palm to make her laugh. And she did.

"That's Casey," Steve looked behind him at JD who was hiding behind his leg, "and this big guy is JD."

She bent over, "Hi JD, I'm Dr. Matzu. Do you want to help me get my medical stuff out of my bag?"

He peeked around his leg, his eyes suddenly very curious, "Ok."

Steve smiled at him and then looked over at Kari. "Keilie's brother and I were best friends when I lived in LA."

She nodded, "So I gather, and you tortured the poor child."

"Actually," Keilie corrected, "I tortured him."

"That is true," he confirmed.

"Well," Kari patted Keilie's back as she walked by, still holding Casey, "if you want to continue the tradition, I'll ignore the screams." She walked out of the room.

Keilie pointed with her thumb over her shoulder, "I like her. She's got a good sense of humor."

"Yes she does," he agreed.

"Ok," Keilie said, opening up her bag and speaking to JD. "First we need to prepare." She pulled out two pairs of blue medial gloves, handing one pair to him, "Here you are doctor JD."

He smiled brightly, looking up at her, "Can I put those on?"

"You are my assistant aren't you?"

"Yes," he took them from her and slipped the large gloves over his hand in the same way that she did.

"We need to take his temperature first." She took out a thermometer and a small box, handing him the thermometer, "Stick it right here in this hole and that will put a special cover over it."

He followed her instructions carefully, "Should I put it in his mouth?"

"Yes please doctor, under his tongue."

"Sit down Dad," he ordered.

"Yes sir," Steve chuckled, sitting on the edge of the bed. He opened his mouth and watched as JD mirrored his movement by opening his own mouth as he carefully put it under his tongue, "Close your mouth now."

He did as he was told.

"Count to ten and take it out," Keilie instructed.

JD counted silently but they both could see his lips move as he stared at the thermometer sticking out of his Father's mouth. When he was done, he carefully took it out and gave it back to Keilie. She showed him the numbers on the side, "99.8. A little high but still ok, it's expected when you're healing from something like this."

"Ok, Dr. JD. Thank you so much for your help, but I think I will take it from here."

"Can I keep the gloves?" he asked.

"Of course, once they are put on they belong to that person forever."

"I'm going to show Mom," he exclaimed, running for the door.

"Hey," Steve yelled to him, "what do you say?"

He stopped and turned, "Thank you for the gloves, they're super cool!"

"So are you JD," she said, watching as he disappeared. She looked back at Steve, "What a doll he is." She walked over to the door, closing it part way and then back over to him, pulling up on the bottom of his shirt, helping him get it off. "You did really well for yourself in the family department."

"Thanks. I am pretty lucky." He thought about that and for the first time in a while he really did feel it. "So what's Max up too?"

Keilie grabbed the chair by the dresser and set it down in front of him, sitting on the edge. "He's married and has a couple of kids. He's a Controller for a big Company down in San Diego." She leaned in examining his wounds. "I think your job is a little more exciting than his though."

Steve huffed, "The excitement was overwhelming that day."

She touched the staples over his lung incision, "I think we'll leave these in for another day, just for good measure."

He glanced down at it, hoping maybe it wouldn't look as gruesome, but it did. He took a deep breath and let it out, turning his head. "That's going to be a bad scar." He looked at her for her opinion.

She leaned back, "Actually Dr. Lind did a very nice job closing it up, and the incision is pretty small considering the injury. The swelling will go down a lot. Eventually it will just be a thin line, plus your chest hair will grow back and cover most of it."

A smile slowly emerged on his face; he looked down again, "You think so?" That was the best news he'd heard so far.

She nodded as if she were positive. She reached in the bag taking out her stethoscope and rubbing the metal part over her thigh getting it warm. "Breathe normally."

She moved it around his chest in different spots and then sat on the bed next to him, moving it to his back.

"Any trouble breathing, losing your breath or coughing?"

"Nope, nope and nope," he replied.

"Sounds good," she sat back on the chair, "have you been up and moving around?"

"Not really, I've been kind taking it easy the last couple of days. I tore a staple and they had to fix it. I don't want to do that again."

She pointed at the spot, "I see that. Well, after tomorrow when the staples come out, you should be able to begin physical therapy."

"When can I go back to work?"

She looked up at him surprised, "Wow, you really like your job don't you?"

He chuckled guessing that might have sounded odd to her after seeing first hand what his job gave him, "It's an adventure that's for sure."

"How's the family handling this crisis?"

He tilted his head, taken back by the personal question, but then had to remember he wasn't talking to Keilie, he was talking to a certified doctor no matter if she still looked like a kid too him or not. "They're ok I guess."

"Hmmm," was all she said, sitting back in the chair, "sometimes situations like this can be very traumatic on the family just as much as the victim." She studied the rest of his chest, "But it looks like this is old school for you. You're body is like a storyline of scars." She smiled up at him, "Either you're really good at your job, or you're really bad at it."

He couldn't help but laugh at her, "I was a Seal for six years and now I head the Governor's task force here in Hawaii. I think I'm pretty good at my job. It's just dangerous."

"Bringing me back to my point. How is the family handling this?" she pushed.

He wasn't so sure how much she knew. He was pretty sure though she'd seen all the reports but he didn't know exactly yet what was in them. Danny had filled them out and had kept Kari out of it as much as possible, but JD was another story. She had to know that he was there. "You probably know that JD was there when it happened."

She nodded, "I saw that in the file. How is he?"

"He's had bad dreams."

Keilie sat back in the chair, crossing her legs, "Bad dreams or nightmares?"

Steve looked down, remembering the one from the hospital, "Nightmares, but that was a few days ago. He hasn't had one since. I'm hoping he's over it."

She shrugged, "You're home now. It's exciting and comfortable for him again." She stood up grabbing his shirt, "Don't think for a second that they're gone though. Have you talked about it with him?" She held it open in front of him as he slipped his arms in.

"No, not yet."

"Why rock the boat, huh?"

"Exactly."

"Well it may be calm seas right now, but inside that brain of his there is a storm brewing and when you go back to work, I can almost guarantee the weather is going to change." She carefully pulled the shirt over his wounds, "You're wife too. I don't want to get too personal with you, but I bet she feels the same way, maybe more so in her condition."

"She understands my job," he argued, "She gets it."

Keilie put her hand on his shoulder, "That's what they all say."

He was so concerned with JD over all of this that he never thought about how Kari was dealing with it. It came back down to everything he had discovered that morning. He needed to listen to her. She needed to be heard as much as JD. "I'll talk to them." He wondered if maybe his job wasn't the focus point of everything that had happened over the last couple weeks.

"I can put you in touch with some counselors too." She stood up and moved the chair back over by the dresser.

He nodded and never would have thought that the visit he was expecting today would have turned out to be more mentally than physically, but then again he was glad it did. "You're very good at what you do." He complimented her.

"Thanks!" she took his arm, helping him up off the bed, "I love people. It's the Hawaiian in me."

He followed her out of the room, realizing he hadn't even been downstairs since he was home. The tension between he and Kari seemed to calm, but they weren't there yet, they weren't even close to the place they were before. He knew it might take time and now the idea of what Keilie had thrown at him he had a whole new set of worries to deal with, plus the baby coming and a new house to buy. 'Damn,' he thought, 'the list goes on and on.' He came down the stairs and saw her folding clothes at the table, knowing his number one priority was standing right there, all the other problems seemed to vanish. He had to get his marriage in order or he was afraid they might be living in two separate houses, and too him, that was completely unacceptable.

Keilie followed him downstairs, "Well he didn't scream very loud so I guess I'm getting pretty at this." She smiled at Kari.

She laughed, "Can I get you something to drink Keilie?"

"No thanks," she declined, bending over Casey's portable crib, tickling her under the chin, "I have to get back to the hospital. I'll be back tomorrow at the same time, if that works for you?" she asked them.

Steve and Kari looked at each other, both nodding.

"Sure," Kari answered.

"Can I help then too?" JD asked.

"Of course. I'll need my assistant."

He liked that and it showed.

"It was great seeing you again Keilie, thanks for everything."

"No problem. I'll see you tomorrow."

She opened the door to let herself out and almost ran dead center into Danny's chest.

"Oh, hey there brick wall!" she laughed.

He leaned back getting a look at the pint size Hawaiian beauty he almost ran over. "Hey there to you."

"That's Uncle Danny," JD blurted out.

She looked over her shoulder at Steve, knowing he didn't have any brothers and Danny didn't look like Kari, she assumed they were good friends.

"Danny's my partner." Steve answered the confused look on her face.

"Ahh," Keilie nodded and smiled at him, remembering his name from the medical report as being the one that gave Steve CPR at the scene.

"Danny this is Dr. Matzu."

"Doctor Matzu?" he acted surprised.

"Yeah, yeah," Keilie sighed, "I know. I look like a first year college student."

Danny shook his head, "Not at all. I was looking at your T-shirt. My daughter was at that concert, and if I would have known the audience was going to be so impressive, I might have gone with her."

"Wow!" Keilie exclaimed, patting him on the arm as she went out, "Nice pull Uncle Danny."

He came inside as she breezed past him, pointing over his shoulder, "That's your doctor?"

"Look at what she gave me," JD said, holding up both his hands, showing him the blue gloves.

He bent over grabbing his wrists, "Oh my God, look at your hands! They're blue!" he pretended to be shocked.

JD laughed out loud as Danny shook him, "They're gloves!" he giggled as his whole body moved.

Danny hoisted him over his shoulder walking over to Steve. "How do you feel Grizzly Adams?"

He shrugged, "Better," moving his head, dodging one of JD's feet that kicked.

"I have some papers you need to sign for work." Danny kept an arm over JD, ignoring the squeals of laughter coming from him as he reached in his back pocket taking out the folded papers.

"What is it?" Steve asked.

"My promotion and a hefty raise."

"Funny." He took the papers from him and opened them up, reading them over and then looking up at him.

"Don't look at me like that, just sign it."

"Danny," he started when he cut him off.

"It's all taken care of, just sign it."

Steve looked over at Kari, who stared at the two of them. Not sure just how to approach them. Things had been going well all morning and she hoped that Danny's presence and anger toward her wouldn't change it. She just held her ground.

Danny bent over and set JD down, smacking him playfully on the butt, "Go get me a pop, Buddy."

"Ok," he said, running to the kitchen.

Danny looked up at Steve, "Hurry up? I got have to get back to work."

"If I sign this it could get you in a lot of trouble."

Danny rolled his eyes, "It was you, me, Kono, Chin and two dead guys that were there. I don't see the problem."

"What about Caldwell?"

"He's out of the picture."

"What do you mean he's out of the picture?"

Danny glanced over at Kari, "He won't be a problem to you, and he won't open his mouth. Trust me on that."

"What did you do?" Steve asked.

"Geez!" he groaned, "I took care of it, ok. Chin and I both took care of it, so just sign already!"

"Here," JD reached up, handing him a pop.

"Thanks Buddy." He walked over to Kari as Steve went to the desk for a pen.

She held her breath not sure what he was going to say.

"I told him to stay away from you and that if I found out he was anywhere near you or in contact with you that I'd arrest him."

She nodded, "Thank you Danny."

"You'll tell me if tries to make contact with you?" he gave her a look, as if asking twice.

"Yes!" she replied quickly, "Yes!" she held her hand up like she was pledging the truth, "I swear!"

"I kept your part out of the report. We'll just leave it at that."

She went to touch him and then pulled back, "I'm sorry Danny, for all of this."

He could see her apology written all over her face. "I know." He touched her on the arm, "Like I said, let's just leave it be."

Steve walked over handing him the report, "Thanks Buddy."

"Yep," he turned towards the door, "You can pay me back by putting in a good word for me with that doctor."

"I'll do that!" Kari said, smiling. "She's feisty, you'd like her."

* * *

Kari put the last load of clothes in the dryer and turned it on. She leaned back, stretching her back, ready for bed. She hadn't sent JD over to Maggie's that night. She wanted to sleep with Steve. It had been a good day. They spent most of it outside by the beach playing with the kids and then ordered pizza for dinner, eating it in front of the TV watching _The Lion King_, one of JD's favorite movies; Casey even seemed enthralled with it. It seemed like a normal night so she didn't want to ruin it by distancing herself from him yet again. The only thing she didn't like was the uncomfortable feeling of going up there. She didn't really know what to expect. She knew he had gone to bed earlier after tucking the kids in and had probably fallen asleep. So she thought she would just slip in quietly.

She peeked in on Casey and JD and then brushed her teeth in the hall bathroom before making her way into the bedroom. The light was off and he was in bed, lying on his back, asleep. She came around the far side where she normally slept and slowly sat down so as not to wake him. She had changed downstairs in the laundry room into a maternity shirt so she could just climb in.

She laid back and welcomed the soft mattress that formed to her body. It was so comfortable. The French doors to the lanai were open just a bit and a cool breeze blew in. It was wonderful. She didn't think it could get any better until she felt his hand move over her stomach. She turned toward him and he was looking at her. She smiled and reached her hand back, touching his clean-shaven face. He looked like his old self again, she thought, sexy and gorgeous. She couldn't believe how just a look from him could turn her insides all warm and make her blush. He was without a doubt the most beautiful man she ever met and it was moments like this that she really felt lucky. She could have named ten or even a hundred women who would have given anything to be lying next to him, and having him look at them the same way.

It felt good having her next to him. He wasn't so sure she was going to join him, and he didn't want to ask and hear a 'no' or push her if she wasn't ready. So this moment was like a gift. He wished he could roll over and put his arms around her but couldn't, so he just had to settle with an arm over the baby for now. But he could see her beautiful face, and when she turned meeting his stare, he knew it was a good thing he was lying down because he probably would have fallen down. The way she looked at him brought back that same euphoric rush that he had six years earlier standing in Chin's backyard on Christmas Eve when he took her hand for the first time. The last couple of weeks had been so hard on them, but when it came down to it, he knew he wouldn't change anything different the day of the shooting, even knowing what the outcome was going to be. He still would have given her his vest. He would do anything to keep her safe and happy.

He reached over taking her hand that was touching his face and held it, "I want to ask you something and I want you to tell me the truth. I don't want you to give me the answer you think I want to hear or sugarcoat it. Ok?"

She nodded, feeling uneasy by what he said, hoping it wasn't something about Caldwell again, she prayed that it was all behind them and that he knew it was nothing more than a mistake on her part.

"Do you promise?" he asked again.

"Yes," she whispered, it must have been something weighing heavy on him and she just wanted to ease his worry of whatever it was.

"Would you be happier," he paused, rephrasing his question to get a more direct answer from her. "Do you ever wish for me to have a different job?"

She was floored by his question. She went to say no, but then didn't, only because he seemed so adamant on wanting to know how she really felt.

"The truth Kari," he squeezed her hand, guessing the answer already by her silence. "It's ok."

She didn't want to say it, but she also felt for the first time she was given the permission that every wife in her position hoped for, "Yes," she bit her bottom lip not wanting to cry, "everyday."

He was stunned from that last part; it shocked him that she thought about it that much. He wasn't naïve to think that it never crossed her mind, but everyday was a whole different matter.

He couldn't imagine what it must be like for her, carrying that around and still allowing him to do it without ever complaining, only because she knew he loved his job. He didn't think he could ever pull that off, in fact, he knew he couldn't. He wasn't angry and he didn't feel betrayed in the least, he was actually disappointed in himself for not recognizing it sooner, or maybe he had, but just chose not to see it. It was undeniable now and he couldn't ignore it any longer. He pulled her hand against his lips and kissed it, reassuring her it was ok.

She was about to tell him that she understood, that she was used to it and he shouldn't worry about her, but she didn't. She held back this one time, just wanting to be heard. And she was, loud and clear.


	17. Chapter 17

Kari woke up facing Steve, using him as a body pillow with one arm and one leg draped over him and her head taking up most of his pillow. She didn't even remember rolling over in the middle of the night; it was just a natural reaction. They had always slept close.

She laughed to herself glad that he was on his back, recalling times being pregnant with JD and Casey when he would be on his stomach and wake up before her. He would just lie there sometimes for an hour, not wanting to wake her. She always told him to just roll her off, but he never did.

She went to carefully move her arm to get up and he held on to it. "Not yet," he suddenly blurted out with his eyes still closed, "Don't go yet."

She should 'a known. "Ok," she chuckled, lying her head back down and relaxing. "Have you been awake long?"

"Not really."

She knew that probably meant at least half an hour. "Do you hurt?"

"No," he squeezed her hand with his eyes still closed, "you're better than medicine."

She moved closer and kissed him below his ear and then further down his neck.

"Do you want to go into labor today, because I might be able to make that happen?" He finally turned to her and smiled wickedly.

"I'd like to see you try," she grinned, making eye contact with him as her hand moved slowly over his shirt, heading south.

He let go of her wandering hand and pulled her face close so he could kiss her. She helped the cause by sitting up on her elbow and leaning over him. They barely made contact when everything came to a complete halt.

"Momma!" Casey yelled. They could hear her jumping up and down in her crib, wide-awake.

Steve laughed, "That works almost as good as a cold shower."

"Dadda!" she screamed, knowing he would come for her too.

"Shut up Casey!" JD scolded her, "Mom!"

"I know," she called out, "I'm coming."

Steve kissed her once more before she moved, "It's probably for the best. I'm pretty sure I would have ripped out a staple." He winked at her, "But they're coming out today, so beware tonight."

She rolled off of him, "I'll call the hospital and tell them to get a room ready for me."

"Momma!" Casey yelled again.

Steve rolled off the bed on his side and was out the door before Kari. He went into JD's room.

Casey held onto the side of her crib and smiled excitedly, continuing the jumping as he walked over to her.

"Good morning sunshine," he said running a hand over the blond mess that always seemed to be everywhere, except flat on her head.

She reached up for him, grabbing a handful of his shirt as he lowered the bar of her bed. "Up," she demanded.

Kari came up behind him, leaning over and pulling the basket out from under the crib with all her diaper stuff. She gathered what she needed and reached around him to lie her back down.

"I got it," he said, doing what she had planned.

She put a hand on his back, smiling down at Casey, "Daddy's going to change you."

She put her thumb in her mouth and grabbed the blanket, not really caring as long as one of them was there.

* * *

Kari could hear the two of them slowly making their way down the steps. She glanced over her shoulder as she made coffee and saw him holding Casey's hand as she took one step at a time, using her other hand to grab each bar of the railing as they made their way down. On the last step Kari cheered from the kitchen.

"Yeah Casey. What a big girl!"

She let go of Steve and ran over to her, slamming into her leg, wrapping her arms around it. Kari looked back over at him and laughed.

He stared at his two girls who looked identical, both of them in his opinion were heartbreakers and he had resolved to the fact the first time he laid eyes on Casey that he was done for. His love for JD was one thing, but what he felt for Casey was something entirely different. It was the same amount of love and devotion, but he knew she would be able to get away with things that he might not let JD, only because she was a girl and seeing her cry was like torture. He was glad that Kari was there to be the mediator. He also knew it was the same way for she and JD. Where he was stricter with him she was more lenient. It was a good balance.

JD pounded down the steps after them, "I don't want Casey in my room anymore," he pouted, showing anger and weariness on his face as he yawned. "She makes too much noise!"

Steve put a hand on his head and looked at Kari, "I know Buddy. You should have your own room."

He stubbornly walked away into the family room to watch cartoons.

Kari leaned against the counter, "We need to do something soon about this house." She rubbed her belly, "Five people in a two bedroom house doesn't work."

Steve groaned at the thought of moving, not only from the idea of leaving this house that they loved but also having to pack everything and move it. "I know. We should get on that today." He was going to say before he went back to work, but after her heartfelt confession the night before, he didn't want to bring that up.

Kari bit her bottom lip, raising her eyebrow, "There's one just up the beach for sale. Well at least it was a couple of weeks ago." she shrugged sheepishly, "I never got a chance to look at it because of everything that happened." She still wasn't sure what had given him the change of heart from the morning before and was a little wary over a new confrontation about the last couple of weeks. It was a delicate subject in her eyes and she didn't want to do anything to rock the boat. She then remembered his question the night before about his job, which was also odd, wondering if maybe the shooting hadn't frightened him more than he was letting on.

"Something close by would be ideal, but on this beach?" he questioned, "That could be expensive, especially if we aren't going to sell this house."

"It's not like we don't have the money." She reminded him, "plus Ally's house gave us a good junk in return."

"I know," he agreed, making his way over to her, "if you like it, we'll get it."

She tilted her head at him as he approached; surprised again that he had caved so quickly, "Well there are a couple over on Diamond Head that are really cute too," she teased, knowing they all started at well over $5,000,000."

He smiled, kissing her, "Whatever my baby wants, my baby gets."

She leaned back and was about to say, 'What is up with you?' but was interrupted again by Casey. The child had a sixth sense for knowing just when to interrupt her parents.

"I'm hungwie," she blurted out, "I want ice weam!" she demanded moving to her Father pulling on his shorts.

Steve and Kari both looked at each other in shock. It was the first time she had actually put more than two words together to form a sentence. He bent over and tried to lift her with his good arm, but felt the staples pull, "Ahh," he moaned, "sorry sweetie, you'll have to wait a couple more hours for that." Her hands held tightly onto his shirt as he pried them off. She didn't like that.

"Up Dadda!" she cried, "Up!"

"Come on," he said, taking her hand instead and leading her over to the fridge.

"Don't you dare give her ice cream," Kari ordered, knowing that's exactly what he was doing.

He glanced over his shoulder at her, "It's the first thing she has ever asked for," he defended, opening the freezer. "Please Mommy."

Kari rolled her eyes, "Ok, but tomorrow when she demands ice cream again, you're telling her no."

He pulled out the half-gallon of chocolate and looked down at Casey. Her hair looked like she had stuck her finger in a light socket, but her big blue eyes and beautiful smile danced with excitement over what was in his hand. "Ice weam!" she squealed.

He took the spoon that Kari handed him, giving her a wink, "Thank you." She rolled her eyes at him again as they went over to the table and he set her on his knee, taking the top off.

* * *

Keilie leaned over Steve as he sat in the chair, taking out another staple in his chest. "You ok?" she asked, dabbing the wound with a piece of gauze.

"Yes, it's not bad, just a little sting once in a while."

"I talked to Max last night." She pulled out another one, dropping it in a small plastic disposal bag.

"Really?" Steve said enthused.

"He wants you to give him a call."

"I'll do that."

"I'll give you his number before I go."

He nodded, looking down as she pulled out another one, feeling unaffected by it. "I talked to Kari last night about what we discussed yesterday."

She didn't look up at him but continued her duty. "Oh yeah."

"You were right. She said she wishes everyday that I had a different job"

"I don't think I'm necessarily right, but talking it out can always help both sides. Just being heard can be the solution. It doesn't mean she really wants you to quit. People like to be validated on their feelings, especially when it comes to their spouse or partner."

"Were you going to be a Psychologist before you chose medicine?" he asked, wondering how she could be so incisive about the subject.

"No way!" she laughed, "That would drive me crazy. I did work at a crisis center in San Francisco during the summer though. I assisted with a wide variety of cases, including wives of victims, some were cop's wives." She looked up at him, "I wanted to get the perspective from both sides," she shrugged. "You deal with the family sometimes as much as the patient."

He couldn't agree with her more on that subject; she also impressed him. Most of the time she seemed like she should be holding pom poms, but them she'd talk on a professional level and give off a completely different persona of herself, showing her intelligence and insight.

"I'm thinking about changing jobs," he blurted out, and couldn't believe he actually said it. He just felt at ease talking with her, like she really was a shrink, plus, he really had no one else to talk too about this.

She sat back in the chair. "That's a huge jump. Yesterday you couldn't wait to get back to work and now you want to quit and do something else?"

He sighed, "I know, it's just that what she said last night has really got me thinking."

"You haven't talked to her about this yet, have you?"

He shook his head, "No."

She leaned back over beginning on his shoulder. "You need to tell her. It wouldn't be fair to make a move this big and not include her input. What if you hate your new job? You'll blame her and it wouldn't even be her fault."

"She'll just tell me to stay put."

Keilie smiled, "Well then, problem solved."

He knew she was being sarcastic. "I need to talk to her."

"I think that's a brilliant idea," she smirked.

* * *

Steve came down the steps after putting the kids to bed and smiled at Kari lying on the couch with a bowl of ice cream balanced on her stomach.

"You look very content."

She scooped up a spoonful, "I am, until the ice cream runs out."

He laughed and lifted her legs, sitting down and putting them over his lap. He took her left foot and started to rub the bottom of it.

"Oh my god," she moaned, "forget the ice cream, I'm in heaven." She smiled at him, "You have about a hundred years to stop that."

"Can I talk to you about something?"

She set the bowl on the coffee table, "You can talk to me about anything."

He moved his hand up her calf, gently squeezing it, showing her he appreciated that. He didn't know how start without her thinking it was all because of her. He had other reasons and all of them were rational.

She looked at him as he stared at her foot. She could see it all over him that whatever it was, it must be something big.

"Steve," she said softly, "I know the last couple of weeks have been hard for us, for our marriage. A couple of times it really scared me that we might have gone too far."

He looked over at her. His first reaction was shock over what she said, but then he could see the hurt in her eyes, and knew she was right. He had felt that same concern more than once. He felt ashamed over what he had put her through. The way he had spoken to her and denying her forgiveness. It was wrong and he knew now how close he came to losing her over it. He laid his had back, staring at her, "I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize. I'm not looking for that. I just want it to be over, and know that's it's behind us." She reached her hand out, "I want to know that we're ok."

He ignored the hand and lifted her legs, moving between them up to her, bracing his hands on either side of the couch, looking down at her. "We're ok," he reassured her. "We don't have to talk about that ever again."

She put her hands on his chest and could feel where the staples had been under his shirt. She lifted up on the bottom of it and he stopped her mid way, "What are you doing?" he smiled uneasily and then pulled it back down feeling apprehensive about her seeing it. She lifted it again and as he went to move off of her, she wrapped her legs tightly around him, forcing him down.

"Hey," she smiled seductively, "Where are you going?"

"It looks really bad under there Kari." His smiled faded, "just let it be for now."

She thought about the night he touched and kissed the scars on her back. How good that had made her feel. Both her hands started at his hips and moved up under his shirt, "Don't tell me something on this body looks bad or that I can't touch you." She felt him tense up, but he didn't resist her again as she lifted it over his head.

Her lips began at his throat and she made her way down, gently touching the scar over his lung with her fingertips before kissing it too. His body relaxed as his breathing intensified while she made her way to his shoulder.

His hand slid into her hair, grabbing a handful and gently tilting her head back so he could kiss her.

The emotion that went into it from both sides ran deep, being played out by the length and intensity of it. They were back in that place again.

He broke away, still holding her as she breathed heavily. She looked radiant, staring at him. "God, you are so beautiful Kari," he panted.

Her hands caressed over his chest, feeling nothing but his strength and pounding heart, "Let's go upstairs," she suggested, enticing him with a smoldering look.

He nodded in complete agreement, forgetting all about what he wanted to discuss with her, it could wait, but this couldn't.

* * *

Kari lay completely sedated in his arms. She scooted back against him as he pulled the hair away from her sweaty neck, kissing it. She tilted her head giving him free access as her hand reached back, sliding it down his naked body. "Mmm," she moaned, "Make up sex, good." She could hear him smile and chuckle as he playfully bit her ear.

His hand roamed over her belly never once feeling encumbered by it. They had always managed to work around it and still feel the same intimacy and satisfaction of when she was her normal self. "Mmm," he teased, "horny pregnant wife, good."

She laughed out loud, "I haven't heard one of your stellar one liners in a long time." She rolled over on her back as he propped his head on his hand, looking down at her.

"Well," she smiled, "now that you have my full attention, what is it you wanted to talk to me about?"

He kissed the top of her forehead and decided to just rip the band-aid off. "I'm thinking about changing jobs."

That got her attention. "What?!" She pushed herself up so she was leaning against the headboard. "Why?" she asked shocked and then it hit her. "This isn't because of what I said the other night, is it?"

"No," he laid on his back looking up at her, "Well maybe, some."

"Steve," she jumped in, "honey please, I think you took that too literally."

"You wish everyday that I had a different job," he repeated her words.

She sighed, "You asked me an unfair question. Of course I wish you had a job where you didn't go to work and potentially get shot at. But that doesn't mean I want you to quit."

"It doesn't?" he looked at her oddly.

"You know what I mean, Steve."

He pushed himself up so he was sitting next to her, "I do," he put his hand on her thigh, turning his body toward her, "I also know what it feels like…" he paused recalling the horrendous pain he had over the course of that one week when he thought she was dead. "I lost you once, or thought I did." He touched her face coming to grips with those emotions that could play havoc on him when she was involved, "I don't ever want you to feel that loss Kari. I don't want my kids too either."

The passion in his eyes over his feelings about this subject showed, and she couldn't deny his sincerity. He was doing it for all of them, but not for the reasons she had thought, it wasn't because of her fear, he was doing it to protect them. "What else would you do if not that?"

He shrugged, "I don't know. I have a couple of things in mind." He hadn't really thought that far yet. He wanted to get through this part first before jumping ahead.

"Would we leave Hawaii?"

"No," he said adamantly, "this is our home. I'll find something here."

He looked down and she couldn't take her eyes from him. "Are you sure about this Steve? You know I'll stand behind you no matter what you do, even if you stay." She could see a smile cross his face as he took her hand, bringing it up to his lips.

"You know what the one thing is that I've always regretted?"

She tilted her head, "What?"

"That I never got to propose to you."

She scooted down, lying her head on his shoulder with an arm across him, "Yes you did."

"When?" he questioned her, confused by that.

"In the backyard of Chin and Malia's house Christmas Eve. When you took my hand and looked at me for the first time like you always do now. You didn't have to ask in words for me to hear it loud and clear." She hugged him, "That was a proposal, and it was perfect."

He put his arm around her, "God you're easy to please." He pulled her chin up so he could see her, "I love you very much."

She kissed him before returning it. "I love you too." She relaxed back on his shoulder. "Have you talked to Danny yet?"

He let out a deep sigh, "No." This conversation was hard enough to breach; he didn't want to think about that one.

"What will happen to Five-O?"

"Danny will take over I guess." His decision was only two minutes old and already there were so many questions with answers he couldn't give. But he felt it was the right decision for his family.

She sat up so she could see him, wanting to really know if this was right for him. Her hand braised across his chest and the healing scar over his lung. She looked at it, realizing then that she would never have that fear again when he left the house in the morning, or when he got that call in the middle of the night. The vision of him lying on the ground as Danny gave him CPR flashed across her eyes and for that moment she felt selfish, not wanting to question his resolve and try to change his mind, but it felt unsettling too.

"Hey," he whispered, getting her attention, reading her like a book. "I don't want you to worry about this. It's my decision."

"But it affects all of us." She closed her eyes, wanting to stop herself from arguing the subject but couldn't. "I know you think about us first all the time, it's just how you are and I love that about you; but we want you to be happy too."

"You don't get it, Kari. It doesn't matter what I do out there," he pointed down, affirming his point, "right here in this house, that's what's most important to me."

In his heart he believed what he was saying at that moment was true, but she knew better. He did care. She just hoped that when he came to realize that, whatever job he was doing at the time was as satisfying too him as being a police officer, and she wasn't sure that would be true. It was useless to try to push him in either direction; he was strong-minded and needed to figure it out on his own. She also knew that she loved him beyond words and would respect whatever choice he made.

She settled in next to him, not sure which feeling would be worse, seeing him go off to work everyday as police officer, or seeing him go off to work doing something that was unworthy of his talents.


	18. Chapter 18

Kari stood next to the driver's side door waiting for Steve to finish strapping Casey into her car seat. He closed the back door and went up to her.

"Have fun," he said, giving her a kiss.

"I wish I could say the same to you." She put a hand on his arm, "Do you know what you're going to say to him?"

"No, I figure we'll have a couple of beers and I'll just tell him. It'll be a promotion for him."

"Do you think he'll see it that way?"

He shrugged, and shook his head wearily.

She tried to smile for him but it was forced. She knew this was going to be difficult for him. "He's your best friend. He'll understand."

"He's my partner, he won't and you know it."

"He'll blame me." She was quite sure of that fact.

"Good," he smiled, "that gets me off the hook."

"Ha, ha, ha," she smirked.

He opened her door and took her arm to help her up into the truck. "Be careful today," he suggested, "don't over do it."

"Does that mean no slide?"

He gave her a look, "I mean it. If you get there and you feel tired or whatever, come home or call me and I'll come and get you."

She rolled her eyes, pretending to look at a watch on her wrist. "Right on schedule. Less than a month to go and you always start treating me like I'm made of glass. I'm not going to break you know."

He smacked her on the butt glaring at her, "Get in."

"Oh my," she gasped. "May I have another?"

He laughed and motioned for her to get in. "The next one won't be as gentle," he teased.

He helped her in, closing the door as she started the engine. He stepped away and waved to JD and Casey in the backseat. She blew him a kiss as she backed up.

* * *

He sat in the backyard nursing a beer when he heard Danny.

"Out here," he yelled, raising the bottle up over the back of the chair.

"Hey," Danny acknowledged him, coming out the back door. "You have more of those I hope."

Steve flipped open the ice chest next to him, pulling one out, holding it up as he approached from behind.

"Thanks Buddy." He twisted off the top and took the seat next to him. "Where's the family?"

"Kari took the kids to the pool."

"How you feeling?"

"Alive," he replied. "Thanks to you I guess, at least that's what I've been told."

"Geez," he moaned, "you didn't invite me over here today so you could profess your undying devotion to me for pounding on your chest a few times, did you?"

"Keep it up," Steve warned, "and I'll return the favor."

"Yep," he leaned over, tapping his beer against Steve's, "you're feeling better."

"How are things going at work?"

"Fine, but I'm a little surprised you haven't been down there just to make sure things are running smoothly in your absence."

"They won't release me to go back for at least another month."

Danny looked over at him, taken back by the casual way in which he said it. "So when has that ever stopped you?"

"Actually Danny, that's what I want to talk to you about."

"What, do you want me to start emailing the case files over, or maybe set up a camera so you can keep an eye on us?" he smiled, "Things are fine, don't worry about it."

"I'm not. I know you're capable of handling things." He let out a deep breath, "Ah shit. This isn't going to be easy so I'm just going to put it out there."

Danny took a drink of his beer, pretending to be bored. "The suspense is killing me."

Steve looked straight ahead toward the water, "I'm not coming back." Out of the corner of his eye he could see Danny's head turn in his direction, but he kept his eyes on the water, not even flinching.

Danny huffed, sitting back in the chair, looking at the same view and fidgeted, tapping the bottom of his beer bottle impatiently on the arm of the chair. The silence was so loud it was deafening.

"I just feel that…" Steve started when he was interrupted.

"What did she say to make you want to quit?"

He finally looked over at him, "This wasn't Kari's decision. She didn't say anything."

"Bullshit!" he growled, slamming his beer down. "This has her written all over it! What did she use the pregnancy as a tool?"

"Hey!" Steve yelled, warning him, "be careful Danny. I know you're pissed, but be careful what you say about my wife."

He moved to the edge of the chair, running his hand through his hair. "Shit!" He hung his head and looked in the opposite direction of Steve, not wanting to see that threatening look burning into the back of his skull. The pregnancy statement was uncalled for. He fumbled with the beer in his hand. "I'm sorry man. I shouldn't have said that about Kari." He regretfully looked over at him, "You're right I'm pissed!"

Steve relaxed again. "For the record, she was just as shocked as you when I told her."

"Why?" He sat back in the chair again, "was it because of the shooting?"

"Yes, that had a lot to do with it."

Danny understood his reasoning but then again he didn't. Steve had been shot at more than once, hell he was pretty sure there was no logical count for how many bullets that had been aimed at him, but he had to take a step back this time, because this was the first time that he had ever been hit. "It freaked you out, didn't it? A little too close to death?"

"Do you remember when we thought Kari was dead?"

"Of course." He remembered having to deal with his best friends sorrow more than anything else.

"That's what freaked me out about this. I don't want Kari to have to experience that," he took another drink and wiped his hand across his mouth, "or my kids."

"You don't think that crosses my mind about Gracie?"

"I know it does."

"So what, does that make me a prick then for sticking it out?"

Steve shot him a look, "So what are you saying, that I'm a pussy for backing out?"

Danny stood up, "Yeah, you're a pussy Steve," he mocked him, "You're usually the first one in, the last one out and I've never once seen you back down from a fight, ever! You're the biggest pussy I know."

"Then what?"

"I just don't get it!" Danny blurted out, raising his hands in defeat. "This is what you do. This is what you have always done. How can you just sit there with a straight face and tell me you're quitting Five-O?" He looked him dead on, "I'm telling you right now; you're making the wrong decision."

"Yeah, well thanks for the support, Buddy, Partner, Friend! Do you have any idea how hard this is for me? Do you think its easy walking away from you, Chin and Kono? It's not like I just woke up this morning and decided to rearrange my life!" He shot out of the chair, feeling frustrated. "I feel like this decision is completely out of my hands." He took a step toward the beach and then turned back around, "Do you know that JD has nightmares about me going to work? Even before his abduction, and since I've been home from work, nothing."

Danny stood still watching the display before him, knowing now more than ever that he was doing the wrong thing, but as he listened to him vent, he got his answer about why he was quitting. It was clear to him, it was also quite clear that he was losing his partner. This wasn't Steve's choice because he didn't want to carry a badge anymore; this was because his family needed him to move on. Or so he convinced himself they did. He'd seen this type of frustration before in cops that had walked from the job, and most had regretted the decision. Steve was his best friend, but he had to draw the line here and felt he couldn't step over it. He had to just sit there and listen to him, and agree with him no matter how wrong he thought he was. You couldn't argue against a man's family. He just hoped that the friendship they had could sustain this parting. "No, I didn't know that about JD." He swallowed down the words he wanted to say, knowing it wouldn't matter what he said, Steve had set his mind on this course and in his eyes there was no turning back. That he knew without a doubt.

"I love my job Danny. You know that," He sat down on the edge of the chair. "You should know at least a little how I feel. You traveled across the country to live in a place you hate, all for family."

"Maybe," Danny argued, "but I didn't stop being who I was for her. JD is five years old. He'll adapt, or you, me," he pointed his finger back and forth between them, "we can help him too."

"What about Kari?" he sighed, "I can't let her go through that same pain that I did with her. I won't!"

Danny stopped right there, giving up the fight. He knew it was useless to go on, because he had already lost this battle the second he walked in the door today. Steve wasn't going to change his mind. The second Kari's name came up he knew that McGarrett stubbornness would hold that door closed and the only way to get it open was for Steve to unlock it himself. His anger turned from disappointment to sadness for him. He was giving up everything he loved for someone he loved. He thought it was noble but he also thought it incredibly naïve of him to think he could walk away from doing what he'd been trained and lived for over the past twenty years. He started to laugh at his next thought, "What the hell are you going to do if you don't carry a gun? Retire?"

Steve's expression became contorted, "Hell no! I'm too young for that. I'd go crazy and Kari would end up shooting me anyway."

Danny finished off his beer and handed it to Steve, "Replenish me, because I think I might have to drink myself into understanding this."

Steve pulled out two more, handing him one. "Think of it this way. You'll get to take over. You'll get a nice raise and you can have 'tie day' on Friday if you want."

"Don't patronize me by trying to make me see the sunny side of all this," he sighed, "what makes you so sure I want that job anyway?"

"Because you'd be great at it. Chin and Kono both respect you and would follow you."

"We'd need four. We'd have to find someone else. That's where it gets sticky. We all mesh really well and bringing in an outsider would be tough."

Steve nodded. He was right about that. It would be hard for them to find a new person. The camaraderie between the four of them is what really kept things running smoothly. A bad choice could bring the whole team down. He suddenly felt a wave of reality hit him. He was actually sitting here trying to find someone to replace him at Five-O.

"I got it," Danny announced, like the answer had been sitting in front of them. "Conner Jefferies." He looked over at Steve, "He'd be perfect. We all get along. He's not hot-headed. He's smart and he listens too me." He glanced over at him, "Unlike some other people." He sat back, relaxing, "I think I found your replacement."

"Well shit, that took all of about ten seconds," he said sarcastically, "glad I'm so easy to replace."

"Hey Buddy," he said in his defense, "you brought this on yourself." He stretched his legs out in front of him, "I'm still reeling over the fact that I'm the Big Kahuna now. I've got some great ideas too." He took a long drink of his beer

"What ideas?" Steve sat up, glaring at him.

Danny didn't reply but just smiled, knowing that would irk him more.

"There's nothing that needs to change with Five-O," he said proudly, sitting back, knowing that Danny was probably just trying to yank his chain. "You can't mess with perfection and I've perfected that team."

"Jesus," Danny exclaimed, "what's your next job going to be? Foreign affairs, are you going to straighten out the world?"

"Shut up!" Steve retorted, "You're exhausting to talk too."

"I'm exhausting? I lose sleep sometimes over the conversations we have."

"That doesn't even make sense!" he laughed, "You lose sleep over exhausting conversations!" he held his hand up, "Please, do me a favor and just stop talking." He reached over to the ice chest and pulled out another beer. "Here, put your mouth on this."

* * *

Kari came in the house behind JD and Casey, dropping the diaper bag and towels on the floor by the front door. She watched JD run to the open backdoor.

"Hi Dad! Hi Danny!" He grabbed himself, moving his hips back and forth.

"JD," Kari said, "Go to the bathroom first. You've had to go since we left."

He ran by her for the stairs as she smiled at Casey who had climbed on the couch with her blanket and lied down. Kari knew she was tired from playing in the pool. She put a dry towel over her, kissing her forehead, knowing she'd be out in seconds.

She came in the kitchen and noticed right away the cut limes on the counter as well as the two empty beer bottles. She leaned over the sink seeing the two of them sitting out back in the chairs. As she came outside their loud voices alerted her to the notion that maybe they had more than enough beer.

"Hi," she said coming up behind them. They both turned in their chairs at the same time almost bumping heads.

"Kari!" they both yelled out simultaneously.

_'Good Lord,_' she thought.

Steve went to get up and she put a hand on his shoulder, "No, no, stay put." She looked in the open ice chest and saw plenty of empty bottles of beer, plus a bottle of tequila. "Are you boys enjoying your afternoon?" She eyed them separately trying to get a read on just how drunk they were, wondering if they had talked about the issue at hand.

"Aloha!" Danny blurted out, raising his beer to her. "We decided Steve is going to be a nature guide security agent," he chuckled looking over at him, "maybe down at the botan…" he paused, trying to stifle his laughter with his fist, "botanical gardens in full camo. He can hide behind the flowers and bust people walking off the path."

Steve looked over at him and they both busted up laughing over the thought of it.

'_Oh Yeah_,' Kari thought, '_they're drunk_.' She'd seen Steve intoxicated before but never this much. They both had that relaxed, silly attitude like they had been enjoying themselves. '_At least they're happy drunks and things had gone well with the conversation_,' she thought. She had been worried about him all afternoon that Danny would take it badly and things would change between them, but to her great pleasure none of that had happened.

"Have you eaten anything?" she asked.

Steve sat back still laughing and held up an empty bag of chips.

She took it from him, "I'll make you something."

"How was the…ahh…?"Steve began and then his expression became confused.

"The pool?" she finished his lost thought trying not to laugh.

"Yeah, the pool."

"It was fun."

He smiled lazily at her, reaching up and taking her hand. "Look at my wife Danny," he stifled a burp with his beer hand, "Isn't she something?"

Danny went to tap his beer against Steve's but missed, not even realizing it. "Yep, she is pretty and cook! You can cook!" he yelled out too loudly.

"Pretty?" Steve questioned, "she's buiful!" he slurred, pulling her down for a kiss.

She amused him and at the same time she reached in the ice chest, taking out the bottle of tequila, hiding it behind her back. "You are too sweet Steve." She turned around rolling her eyes at them. "Sit tight and I'll bring you out some food."

"You need to get one of those," she heard Steve say.

"A pregnant wife?" Danny blurted out, "Hell no!"

She heard them both laugh again.

She looked back before going in and could see Steve leaning over his chair, whispering something to Danny. They both looked back at her, Steve smiling brightly and Danny with a stunned expression on his face.

She could only imagine what he had told him. She met JD coming out of the house and halted him.

"Wait, you can't go down there."

"How come," he asked, looking beyond her to his Dad and Danny?

She turned him around, "Because they are talking business stuff. Things you can't hear."

"I won't listen," he argued.

She had to think quickly. "Hey, how about if I put a game on the new lap top?"

His eyes got big. He never got to play on the lap top computer. "Ok, can I sit on the couch?"

She looked over her shoulder as they busted up laughing, "How about in your room?"

He happily agreed as she moved him inside.

* * *

Kari put a pillow under Danny's head as he lay back on the couch. She had fed them a variety of leftovers, including chicken and roast beef she had in the fridge as well as some pasta she had quickly whipped up. She wanted to get as much food in them as possible to try to sober them up some. It worked, along with time and a couple of hours of ice tea rather than ice-cold beer. "Is that ok or do you want another one?"

He nestled his head into the pillow, "It's fine."

She pulled the blanket off the back of the sofa and covered him up. His blood-shot eyes were barely open and it surprised her when he took her by the wrist.

"Do you really think he'll quit?"

She paused; relieved that they had talked but felt bad for him by the way he was looking at her, "I think he's pretty sure of his decision."

"What do you think of it?"

She sat on the coffee table as he let go of her wrist. "I just want him to be happy and do whatever makes him happy."

He rolled his eyes, "Textbook answer."

"I know you blame me for this Danny, but it really wasn't my decision."

"I know. I did," he looked up at her, "blame you. I said some stuff that I feel bad about."

She didn't reply.

"You're a good person Kari." He smiled sheepishly, "I've always had you up on this pedestal," he lifted his hand showing her how high and then let it drop on his chest, "I think that's why it was so hard for me when all that shit went down. It hurt that you didn't trust me that I would help you."

"Danny, I never meant to hurt…"

He held his hand up, "Don't say anything. You already apologized and it's forgotten." He reached over taking her hand, which surprised her again. He'd never been the physical type. "I need you to forgive me. I'm good at blaming the people I love the most for things that hurt me the most. When it's not even their fault." He chuckled at himself. "Did that make any sense at all? I'm not sure it came out the way I was thinking."

She squeezed his hand and leaned over, "It made perfect sense. And I think you are an exceptional friend to not only me but to Steve, and you are an incredible roll model for JD and Casey too. I'm so glad you are apart of our family, and no matter what happens with all of this. I want you to know that you always will be."

He wiped his hands down his face, letting the lingering effects of the alcohol get the better of his emotions. "Well there you go," he sighed raising his hand, "now I'm going to have to get a taller pedestal."

She smiled, leaning over and kissing his cheek, "Good night Danny."

"What's this?" Steve said, leaning against the wall at the foot of the couch, "right in my own house." He slapped his hand in the air as he turned toward the stairs, "you're both shameless."

She went to get up and he took her by the wrist again. "Kari," he looked toward the stairs to make sure Steve was out of hearing distance. "He would do anything for you no matter what it cost too him. I mean anything. He loves you that much."

She sat back down, "Danny, you know as well as I do that once he gets his mind-set on something, there's no changing it, especially when he feels so sure of himself." she huffed, shaking her head, "the frustrating part is that 99% of the time he's right, so it's hard to argue when the 1% comes up."

"Goddamn that stubbornness," Danny growled.

"Isn't it funny how sometimes that stubbornness drives you crazy and other times you rely on it and need it?"

He slowly smiled understanding that wholeheartedly. "I still think he's making the wrong decision," he confessed.

Kari looked over her shoulder and then back at him, "I'm not sure what he's doing is right either, but I trust him and I won't go against him again, ever."

"You know," he gave her the stink eye, "I'm getting really tired of this perfect little relationship you got going on. It's starting to mess with my life."

"It looks like you need to find one of your own Danny." She smiled cunningly, "I heard the hospital has some great new interns."

"Maybe I'll recruit a full-time doctor for the team," he grinned before closing his eyes.

* * *

Kari sat down on the edge of the bed next to Steve as he stretched out with one arm tucked under his head.

"I drank too much," he sighed, "I'm sorry about that. We just got on a roll."

"And you say I'm shameless."

"You were kissing my partner on the couch," he laughed.

"He held my hand too," she smiled shyly.

He pretended like he was going to get up, "I'm going to kick his ass."

She rolled her eyes, giggling, "Settle down tough guy."

He smiled up at her, putting a hand on her stomach, "Any movement?"

She shook her head covering his hand, "No, must be sleeping." She leaned over his chest, bracing a hand on the other side of him, "So it seems like he took the news pretty well."

Steve's smile faded, "Yeah, he already has a fourth person in mind to take my place. Connor Jeffries."

She could tell by the tone of his voice he wasn't pleased. "I thought you liked Connor?"

"I do," he replied quickly, "It's just, you know, he's…" he didn't know exactly how to characterize it.

"He's your replacement?"

He looked up at her, turning that thought over in his head. "It was hard hearing that from Danny today."

She touched him on the face, "I know. I don't think he's convinced you're really going to quit."

"I am," he responded firmly, maybe a little too much. He sat up facing her. "You think I'm doing the right thing, don't you?"

He tried to search her eyes for any doubt. This was one of the hardest decisions he'd ever made and he needed her to lean on, and more than anything he needed her support and understanding.

She understood what he was asking and gave him what he was looking for, only because she loved him. "Yes. I trust you." She saw the relief in his eyes almost instantly.

It was the answer he was hoping for. This decision he had made impacted so many people, but he felt he couldn't turn back now, telling Danny had finalized it. He knew it was going to hurt him, but he didn't expect the reaction it would play on himself as well. He spent so much time trying to convince Kari and everyone else he was doing the right thing that after all the shock had worn off, he found himself with doubts, but quickly denied his own feelings telling himself it's what was best for his family. "It's all going to work out. I need to move on to something else," he told her, but said it more to convince himself.

"Do you know what that is yet?"

"I have a few ideas. I was looking at a couple of places that need Security Admin." He chuckled, recalling a conversation in the yard; "Danny had a variety of options for me, including daycare worker."

They both got a good laugh from that one.

"What do you think I should do?"

She put both her hands on his face, "Something that gives you satisfaction."

He smiled devilishly, tilting his head, inches from her lips, "Maybe I could make a living kissing you."

She let her hands drift down his chest, "I would pay for that."

He didn't kiss her but just looked at her adoringly, "How lucky are we?"

She returned his gaze, moaning softly, "Very lucky."

It was then that she got her kiss. The gentle touch felt pleasing but the emotion was overshadowed by her concern over his newfound path in life. She didn't want to say it out loud and directly to Danny, but she agreed with him. It was her loyalty to Steve that held her back. If the circumstance from the last few months hadn't happened then she would have spoken her mind, but it was because of her lack of loyalty that all this had happened in the first place. Her lingering guilt over that played havoc on her. She just couldn't bring herself to show him that she was anything else, but on his side.


	19. Chapter 19

Steve heard the baby at the same time as Kari. She bolted up in bed and swung the covers off her legs, first turning toward him and then the other way as if she were in a daze. He reached out and put a hand on her arm. "I got it, go back to sleep."

"I need to feed her."

"I'll give her a bottle."

"She should have breast milk," she argued half asleep.

"One bottle of formula is not going to hurt her. Lay down," he ordered, knowing she had already been up twice that night.

Baby Ally had arrived three weeks earlier and two weeks before her due date. It had been a surprise as well as a little nerve-racking at the prematurity of it, but all had gone well and she was just a tad under weight but all together healthy. It seemed to both she and Steve that she was making up for it by eating constantly.

Kari laid back down and Steve was pretty sure she was asleep before he was out of bed. He walked across the room and bent over the bassinet, smiling at the tiny infant who was cooing and trying desperately to find something to latch on too.

"Hey you," he whispered, sliding his hands under the blanket, lifting her out, "will you please give your Mom a break?" She fit snuggly in the crevice between his chest and left arm. He walked quietly out of the room, closing the door behind him and down the steps to the kitchen. He glanced at the microwave clock that read five-fifteen.

"You are nothing like your brother and sister," he spoke to her as he prepared a bottle with one hand, "twice a night max, that's all they ever got up. You're going to be the trouble maker aren't you?"

No sooner did he get the words out did Ally start to cry. She had waited long enough for her need and was letting him know it.

He gently bounced her, shaking the bottle and testing it on his wrist. "Ok," he said patiently, "it's coming, it's coming."

He rubbed the nipple of the bottle over her lips as she bawled, her small lungs barely making a disturbance. "C'mon sweetie," he encouraged until she finally recognized it, opening her mouth and then latching on to it as if she hadn't eaten for days.

"Geez," he groaned, wondering if she tore into poor Kari that way too.

He sat down on the sofa and propped his legs up on the coffee table, watching her devour the bottle. He leaned down, kissing her forehead. She was perfect in his eyes. This little angel that stared up at him, completely at his mercy for everything she needed to survive. He would go to any lengths to ensure the safety and security for his family. There were no limitations as far as he was concerned. His wants and desires took backseat to Kari's and the kids. She would tell him over and over that he needed to do what was best for him as well, and they would all follow no matter what, because they trusted him. It was a fine line he was balancing on at the moment.

The job offer was there. It was better than anything he had looked at so far and all he had to do was just say yes. The location is what concerned him. It would mean moving to the mainland, something he had told her he wouldn't do. But the job was head of security for a large company that would utilize him in ways that he could really expand on his talents in a new direction. Keilie's brother Max was recently promoted to CEO and after reconnecting with him he offered Steve the job. The pay was almost twice what he was earning working for the Governor, but the downside was that it was in San Diego, and although he refused to admit it, the other downside was that it simply wasn't Five-0.

He looked around the house that had been their home since Kari had stepped foot in it. They had so many great memories there and in Hawaii. He thought about Maggie and what it would mean to her if they moved, and the kids, taking them away from her. He tried to tell himself that San Diego was just a plane ride away and with the extra money he made, he'd pay for her flights, plus he'd never object to Kari coming here to visit.

He had an answer for every question or excuse that came up, the only one he couldn't answer and refused to deal with was his own gut telling him it was wrong. '_It's what's best for them.'_ He told himself for the hundredth time. "_It'll be a good move."_ He thought again of the almost fatal injury he received, not understanding why he couldn't get beyond that. It had scared him more than he had let on.

He had loved working with Danny, but he was beginning to come to the conclusion that quitting wasn't so much for his family as it was for himself. He had so much to live for now, where as before it was just him. He wasn't sure he could do the job with that sitting on his shoulder all day, that's what he was running from. He was just simply scared, and it was easier for him to deny it and move on then to face something he never had to before, fear. He shook his head, denying it yet again.

He smiled down at Ally as she gulped her last bit of milk. He turned her over, still laying on his arm in a football hold and gently patted her back until she let out a burp that echoed across the quiet family room.

Steve laughed quietly, "That's my girl. You're going to be a tom-boy aren't you?" She burped once more and lay motionless on his arm as she fell back asleep, perfectly content.

He made his way back upstairs and laid her carefully back in the bassinet after a quick diaper change. He knelt down, covering her up, taking a minute to just stare at that beautiful little face that had given them so many surprises over the last year; first the pregnancy, and then the early delivery and now the late night multiple feedings. She had a stubbornness that he couldn't help but admire. JD and Casey had been dream babies compared to Ally, and she was only a month old. Nevertheless, she was making her mark in the family and everyone was already bowing down to her.

He caressed his hand over the soft, dark hair on her head, laying his on the edge of the bassinet so it was the same angle as hers, not able to pull himself away as her face contorted to different expressions as she slept. He found it amusing and couldn't imagine what she was dreaming about. He amused himself by guessing it was probably because either he or Kari weren't jumping high enough when she ordered.

Everyone she had been introduced to so far commented how she looked just like him. He thought it was an insult to the poor kid, even coming from his own wife. Until she pulled out some baby photos of when he was about five months old, and sure enough, they were almost identical twins, but as he stared at her now, the only thing he saw in her that was similar, was that unmistakable stubbornness. Kari had joked that the girls in the house now had the upper hand, but Steve somehow knew that little Ally wasn't going to cave in to the typical girly-girl stereotype. She was going to be a fighter like her old man. That thought made him laugh.

Sometimes his current status in life would hit him and he would be amazed at how he got here. Seven years ago if someone had told him he'd be married with three kids by this time, he would have laughed in their face, so would have everyone else. He looked toward the bed; it was a funny thought, until she came along. Somehow it didn't seem so funny after he met her. He felt that familiar rush of excitement and clarity sore through him. It was just as strong now as it was the first time that he felt it, lying next to her in JD's bed when he had woken up and realized that he was in love with her. The need to be next to her from that moment on had never faded. He felt it now and pushed himself up off the floor and carefully crawled back up on the bed with her.

She felt his presence and instinctively put an arm around him, moving in closer. That small gesture was like a security blanket that he welcomed eagerly, moving his arm, allowing her to use his shoulder as a pillow.

Her soft hair fell over him as he let out a slow calculated breath, trying to ease himself down from the sexual craving that was beginning to grow. She still had another week before they both knew it would be ok to make love again. These few weeks after the babies were born were both a blessing and a curse. They had an agreement to try not to look at the other in that way for the first few weeks after the births, but it was impossible. How could you not, he would tease her. "Look at you."

It always made her smile in a way that would taunt him even more.

He looked down as she slept, admiring her delicate features. She was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. He had yet to meet another woman since Kari entered his life that could even hold a candle to her. He was so proud of his family. It was the single greatest achievement he had accomplished so far in his life. He bent his head and kissed her on the forehead and quietly he whispered, "I love you."

To his surprise she lifted her face up to him, "I love you too."

He chuckled, "I didn't know you were awake."

"Just relaxing," she resumed her position, "I feel very relaxed right now."

He caressed her arm that was over his chest, "Me too."

"It's so quiet. Did she go right back to sleep?"

"Yes, after sucking down about five ounces in three minutes."

"Five ounces?" she said surprised, "I hope she burped well."

"Like a Sailor," he replied proudly.

She sat up on her elbow, "Thank you for letting me sleep."

He got caught up in her beauty and hesitated before answering.

"You're welcome," he sighed, feeling privileged for being in the spot he was at that moment, "You are so pretty Kari."

She smiled, shaking her head at him. "I'm pretty. You love me." She repeated his quotes, sliding down his body, kissing his chest as she went. "Flattery will get you everything." Her hand stroked the inside of his thigh.

"Where you going?" he panted, pulling on her arm.

She kissed his naval, "I want to say hello to the Commander," she giggled.

"Hey," he slid a hand between her face and his body, "stop. If you can't, I can't."

She looked up at him, leaning over his stomach, "Really?" she said surprised, "You want me to stop?"

He reached down with both hands and got them under her arms and pulled her back up so she was facing him. "Yes. I'll wait for you."

She narrowed her eyes, studying him, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing!" he huffed.

"Spill it," she sighed, sitting up.

"Why, what?" he stuttered, "There's nothing," he lied.

"Steve, you have never said no to that. Ever!"

He shrugged, "I just thought it would be nice, more romantic if I waited for you and then," he shrugged again, "you and me together. You know?"

She didn't say it but she looked at him with the expression, 'are you kidding me,' all over her face.

"What?" he laughed.

"Nothing," she sighed heavily, lying down on her back.

He in turn rolled over, looking down on her, "You want me to be more romantic. You've always said that, and now I try to and you don't believe me?"

She tilted her head, "Romantic for you is bringing me flowers, or rubbing my feet, but when you pull me away from that, after you haven't had sex in almost five weeks," she stared at him knowingly, "there's something wrong."

He went to tell her about the job but he couldn't do it. Instead he chose something else. "I want to go away together for a while."

"What do you mean?"

"Just you and me. Maybe to one of the other islands, just for a couple of days." He felt if he could get her out of the norm that it would be easier to tell her.

"Yeah ok," she rolled her eyes, "let's go on vacation."

"I might be able to get the helicopter." His hand went under the bottom of her shirt, caressing her stomach, "Remember the last time we did that?"

She stared up at him, realizing he was serious. "Yes, I remember, but that was before we had three kids, two in diapers. We can't just take off for a couple of days."

"Why not? The kids can go to Maggie's. You know she would do it in a minute."

She shook her head in disagreement, "That's too much for Maggie."

"Gracie could come over and help her. We could pay her and Maggie loves having her around too."

She went to argue the situation further but didn't. She had to admit that the idea did sound appealing to her, but more than that it seemed that he needed this more than she did. It was obvious to her that he was struggling with something new. She couldn't even imagine what could be next. The last month had been like a roller coaster. She had even considered the fact that maybe he was having a midlife crisis. She couldn't blame him. Here he was pushing forty, and in the last few years his life went from one extreme to another. She wondered if maybe it was catching up with him and all this was becoming slightly overwhelming for him and he just needed a few days to regroup. Maybe it would also bring clarity with the job change. It might be her chance to really get behind the reason for that. He had already turned down a couple of jobs that had been offered to him that he hadn't even applied for. He needed something that would challenge him, like Five O, but she wasn't sure where he would find that unless he just went back to it, which she thought would be the best solution. That subject alone was weighing heavy on both of them.

"Ok," she finally agreed, "you set it up and I'll follow."

"It'll be good. No distractions, just you and me," he smiled seductively, "plus we can knock it out as many times as we want and you don't have to worry about being quiet." He leaned over to kiss her when she put her hands on his chest.

"Me quiet?" she practically laughed in his face, "what about you?" She playfully mimicked him making moaning and groaning sounds, "Oh Kari, oh baby do it now! Do it now!" she giggled, reaching up putting her arms around his neck.

He smirked, "You keep that up and I'm going to have you finish that job from earlier."

"Too late," she said boldly, "that ship has already sailed my friend."

"What?" he pouted, "I changed my mind."

"No way," she giggled as his hand moved to her hip, tickling her, "Stop!" she begged.

"Give me what I want."

She squirmed beneath him, laughing but trying desperately to keep quiet, "I'll give you a kiss, but that's all."

He stopped abruptly, "Ok. I like your kisses."

She smiled, biting her bottom lip as she moved up closer to his face, "I like you," she whispered before satisfying his request.

* * *

Kari smiled over at Steve as he took a drink of his beer. Their table sat facing the horizon above the cliffs of the island of Lanai, beyond that the blue Pacific stretched for thousands of miles. There wasn't a cloud in the sky and it was what most would consider a perfect Hawaiian day. The island was the smaller of the inhabited and contained only one resort that was first class all the way. Most who came did so for the world class golfing, others came for the beauty, and then there were the locals who came for the peace and quiet, especially if you came from Oahu. At any one time the population on Lanai including locals and guests seldom maxed out over 4500 people; compared to Oahu's million plus, this was serenity.

The flight over in the helicopter had been a plus. They had lucked out that Steve's buddy had taken his family to Disneyland for vacation so the use of the helicopter was open for them. They'd taken their time and flown around Molokini, watching the snorkelers and then hovered over a couple whales playing out in the open water. It was a perfect day so far.

Kari picked up her rum and coke and held it out to him. "Nice job putting this together."

He smiled, his eyes hiding behind his dark sunglasses. "My pleasure," he tapped his beer against her glass. She also had sunglasses on and with her blond hair up in a ponytail and those delicate features and flawless complexion; she could have passed for a movie star hiding on the island. He did notice a couple of people stop and give her a second glance as if that were the case, but people were always giving her second glances. They couldn't help it.

She took a drink and watched him, admiring his manly ruggedness in those shades and that white t-shirt he had on that did little to hide the muscles that flexed with no effort on his part. He sat casually back in the chair with his long legs stretched out in front of him and his feet crossed, looking sexy as hell. She leaned over, putting her elbow on the table, "You know what?"

He glanced over in her direction, "What?"

"You are the best looking man on this island." she corrected herself, "Hell, you are the best looking man on any of the islands."

He chuckled and reached over, pulling her drink towards him, "I think you've had enough."

"You are Steve." She stood up and walked around the table, sitting down on his lap as he sat up in the chair, putting her arm around his neck.

"Can I help you Ma`am," he smiled.

She lifted up his sunglasses and then took hers off too, "I wanted to thank you properly for bringing me here."

He felt his heart begin to race, not giving the other patrons in the bar a second thought. "I'm up for any kind of expression of gratitude you are willing to offer."

She kissed him like she might never see him again. His hand cupped the back of her neck, pulling her closer, feeling as if he might slide out of the chair. Her tongue performed tricks that were so seductive it left him desperately trying to refrain from moaning.

As quickly as it started she ended it, slipping his glasses back over his eyes that became clouded over and were screaming for more. She stood up and walked back over to her chair, sitting down and picking up her glass. She bit the tip of the straw with a Cheshire cat grin before taking a sip. She knew exactly what she was doing to him.

He licked his lips and eased himself down, leaning over, speaking to her more than pleased expression, "You do realize that we are ordering room service for dinner and you have about five minutes to finish that drink and follow me upstairs or I might just lay you down on this table right here." He sat back looking at her from above the rim of his sunglasses, "I'm serious, after five weeks, that kiss was deadly."

She laughed taking another drink, finishing it all in one sip. She set it down, "I'm ready."

He ignored the rest of his beer and stood up, taking her hand and pulling her out of her chair.

* * *

Kari reached over her head and grabbed the wood railings of the headboard with both hands. She pushed her body closer to him as he pulled on her hips. He was doing most of the work and all she could do was hold on as her body ignited in an orgasm. She arched her back, feeling him respond to her by shifting in a way that he knew she loved and moving his hand slowly up her body over her breasts. Those two simple moves sent her over the edge. She was floating off the bed, she was sure of it.

He fell forward on her, still keeping the same pace, diving into her neck. She responded by moaning, enjoying the aftermath just as much as the beginning. She understood what he needed and just waited for him, letting him get into his rhythm, not necessarily wanting it to end too quickly. It felt so good. She missed this closeness with him. Even after seven years and hundreds of liaisons, he could still make her feel like it did the first time.

He could smell her perfume and taste her sweat as he ran the tip of his tongue just below her ear lob before gently biting it. She let out a gasp and then moaned pleasingly just as he had expected, which in turn gave him that familiar rush bringing him closer to his second main goal. The first one he succeeded only moments earlier and now, it was all about him.

He pushed up looking down on her face that was still flushed. That view alone was enough to satisfy him. Her hands began around his neck and then separated as they slid down his body in perfect unison on either side coming to rest over his backside, caressing him. God she had great hands. He felt every nerve end in his body peaking as he laid his forehead on her shoulder, feeling it fast approaching. He waited until it was right there before asking, knowing it was going to be mind blowing this time. He picked up the pace driving deeper into her. "Kari," he groaned, "do it now!"

Her hands came up over his back, clutching his shoulders, pulling down on them as her legs went around his waist, locking together. She felt the full weight of his body come to rest on her as she pushed up into him with her hips, knowing it would only be a matter of seconds now. He loved it when she did that and she loved doing it too him. It had been so long since she'd been able to perform it for him because of the baby. She squeezed her legs around his hips as he let her take over. She was a master at controlling his orgasm, knowing when and how to move her body against his that could prolong it and intensify the sensation.

The mind-blowing prediction took back seat to what he actually experienced from it. She could level him, and did. Once it began his movement coincided with hers was almost more than he could take. He could feel every inch of her body wrapped around him, thrusting her hips up, stroking him gently and then forcefully until she had him just where she wanted. She thought she heard her name but the pleasurable moans that were coming from him almost made her climax again as well. It was a good one for him, she could tell.

He collapsed on top of her, his heart pounding ferociously as he slid a hand down to her waist, clutching her hipbone trying to prevent any more movement. "Don't move!" he begged her, barely able to breathe. He was still experiencing the aftermath, which was like little electric shocks every time she even slightly moved on him. "Oh my God, Kari," he groaned in one long breath.

She let go the tight hold on his shoulders that left finger imprints, sliding her hands over his back, calming him. She smiled, pleased with herself.

* * *

Steve signed the bill for the food and thanked the waiter before he left. He closed the door and pushed the cart around the corner where Kari was laying naked on the bed.

She sat up on her elbow and motioned with her hand for him to drop the robe. "I need to see the goods."

He lifted the top off one of the plates showing her a burger and fries. "There you go."

She eyed him seductively, "You know what I'm talking about."

He picked up a couple of fries and crawled up on the bed to her. She laid out on her back as he dangled one over her mouth. "Open up."

She giggled; "Why is it I'm always naked and you always get the robe?" she reached up taking a bite of the fry.

"Because your body is like a work of art," he dropped the remaining piece in her mouth, "it should be on display. Mine should only be brought out when work needs to be done, like a good tool should be." He leaned over and kissed her.

"I find this body to be an incredible masterpiece," she sighed, moving her hands over the soft material.

He put another fry up to her lips, "You could just lie here and I'll feed you like your Cleopatra."

"Queen for a day?" she smiled, taking it from him.

"Everyday." He kissed her again.

"That would make you the King."

He raised one eyebrow, "I like the sound of that."

"Ruler of your own kingdom," she chuckled, "of course that kingdom only contains a wife and three kids, two of which constantly have dirty diapers," she raised her finger in jest, "but, nonetheless, you are the King."

"I wouldn't have it any other way," he said, confirming it by the way he looked at her.

She reached up touching his face, "Really? Do you really feel that way all the time?"

He tilted his head in confusion, "Of course. I love you guys more than anything."

"Sometimes I think that maybe this is all so overwhelming for you."

He shook his head, still confused by her, "Why would you say that? When have I ever given you that impression?"

She shrugged, "You just seem so…I don't know." She looked at him sheepishly, "I kind of feel like you are going through a midlife crisis with this whole job thing."

He laughed, "It's not a midlife crisis." He stroked her body; "I'm doing this for my family."

"Your family would love you no matter what you did for a living," she looked him straight on, getting her point across, "no matter what."

He knew this was his opening. "I'm glad you said that, because I have some news."

"I know," She put a hand behind her head, preparing herself for the other shoe to drop, knowing this is what he'd been harboring the last couple of weeks. She hoped that maybe he was reconsidering going back to work with Danny.

"You do?"

"I know you've been struggling with something and I also knew that you would eventually sort it out and tell me. Unlike you, I have patients." She smiled, "So out with it."

"I found a job," he blurted out.

"That's great!" she tried to sound enthused, feeling the whole return to Five-0 slipping away. "Where at?"

"Well, that's the sticky part," he caressed his hand over her stomach, feeling apprehensive, "It's a really good position. I think it could be really good for me," he rattled on trying to convince her before he broke the bad news. "I could do well there I think."

She rolled her eyes, "Are you going to tell me where?"

He looked down at her, hoping the look in her eyes wouldn't change too much, "San Diego."

Both of their wishes flew out the door.

"What?!" She sat up, moving off the bed. "San Diego, California?" She practically yelled, standing at the side of the bed with her hands on her hips.

"Yes. Max offered it to me. It's head of…"

"No!" she did yell this time. "You said we wouldn't leave Hawaii." She ran her hands through her hair, "Why? Why would you want too?"

He sat up scooting to the edge of the bed, "It's a job! It's a good one. I'll never find anything like that here."

She crossed her arms. This was the final straw. She couldn't, she wouldn't keep her mouth shut any longer. "You had a good job! Why you quit is beyond me."

He shot her a look, "You know why I quit!" his tone began to mirror hers.

"Don't you dare say it was for us," she clenched her fists, "or I might scream!"

"You just said two minutes ago that you would love me no matter what job I had."

"Don't twist my words, Steve! This isn't just about you finding a job! This is taking us away from our life!" She walked around the bed so she could see him. She was mad but the disappointing look on his face was hard to see. She sat down next to him, knowing that yelling wasn't going to get them anywhere. "We need to talk about this," she said calmly, letting out a deep breath, "when do you have to give him an answer?"

He didn't say anything.

She looked over at him, sensing the reason for his silence. "Steve?" she shook her head, feeling the anger building again, "You already told him yes, didn't you?"

He looked back at her, "Yes."

She shot off the bed, "I want to go home!" She went to the dresser and pulled out some clothes and began to get dressed.

"Kari," he said passively, "We just got here. Let's just talk about this."

"Why? You already made the decision. What's there to talk about?" Her voice was unusually calm, "I just want to go home." She went in the bathroom and slammed the door.

* * *

Kari sat staring out the window of the helicopter with her back to him. She wasn't looking at anything in particular since it was pitch black outside, but she didn't want to speak with him either. The idea of leaving Hawaii and all their friends that had become like family was devastating to her. She couldn't believe he would even consider such a move. They had barely said a word to each other since leaving the hotel. She had nothing to say to him at the moment. She needed to get her head wrapped around this. She did trust him but his line of reason was so far away right now she couldn't even touch it. She felt tears stinging her eyes at just the idea of it when she felt a jolt and then a few seconds later another one. She shifted in her seat, looking over at Steve who had a concerned look on his face.

"What was that?" she asked.

He didn't answer but flipped a couple of switches as another larger jolt made her gasp and put her hand against the window to brace herself.

"Steve?"

"I don't know! We're losing altitude!" He flipped another switch and the lights in the cockpit went out.

"What the hell!" he exclaimed, feeling a rush of adrenaline hit him.

"What's happening?" Kari shouted, feeling a wave of panic sweep over her. The lights came on again and in the same breath relief restored, but Steve's face didn't show the same feeling.

She watched him reach over his head, turning a knob, "May Day, May Day, Echo, Charlie, 6,3, niner, 4. Location 22.31 degrees North, 157.67 degrees West. Approximately 45 miles southwest of Oahu. Heli experiencing engine failure. Requesting emergency…" before he could finish his sentence the lights went out again. "Goddamn it!" he held tightly on to the joystick feeling the hydraulics begin to fail as well.

"Oh my God, Steve," she felt sick.

"Listen to me Kari," his voice relatively calm but firm, "I think I'm going to have to set it down in the water." The lights flickered and came on again. He resumed his conversation with the tower. "May Day, May Day, Echo, Charlie, 6,3, niner, 4, request confirmation?"

"Honolulu tower confirm Echo, Charlie, 6,3, niner, 4, May Day." The voice repeated in their headphones, "radar confirms 32 degrees North, 157 degrees West, 39 miles south, southwest of Oahu airport, head due east five degrees 3 miles."

"We won't make it." Steve spoke to the voice, "Experiencing electrical and hydraulic failure. Altitude descending 590 feet. Two passengers. 560 feet." He reached over with his right hand, pulling up on the straps of Kari's seatbelt, tightening it

"Oh my God! Oh my God!" her voice was small but her face showed all the panic she was feeling.

"Hey!" he said, getting her attention, "It's going to be ok, but you have to listen to me!" She had her hand over her heart and was looking at him but he didn't feel she was hearing him. "Kari!"

"Yes, yes, ok."

"When I set it down it's going to fall forward, but when the blades hit the water it's going to tip. Climb out the other door away from the water. Do you understand?" He looked back out the windshield pulling back on the joystick, trying to level it out.

"The, the door," she stuttered trying stay calm, "the door away from the water." She felt like she was dreaming, two minutes ago she was pouting about a life altering change and now in what seemed like a split second her life was literally dangling on the edge. She heard him try to converse with the tower when her concern went to him. "What about you?"

"I'll get out. There's a raft behind the seat I'll have to get first so don't wait for me. I mean it Kari!" he looked at her, his voice mirroring the importance of that piece of information, "I won't get out until I know you are, so if you hesitate and it fills with water, then it will be bad for both of us!"

"What if I can't get out?"

He put both hands on the joystick as the copter teetered slightly sideways, "Then I'll get you out. Swim up and away from the wreckage as fast as you can! Undo your top strap first then your lap strap." The lights in the cockpit went out again, leaving it dark. He had just got a glimpse of the last altitude reading at 312 feet.

"Oh God Steve," she started to cry, "The kids."

"It's ok, Kari, I've done this before," he lied, "the most important thing to do is NOT panic baby, don't panic!" He had both hands on the joystick as it jerked and sputtered, trying to keep it relatively stable until impact, not wanting it to tip before they hit the water. "If we flip over, follow your air bubbles up to the surface. Concentrate on your seat belt, and how you're going to get out of it." The area outside the windshield was black, which made it difficult to see the water and get an idea of their altitude. He felt it was going to happen soon when suddenly the clouds separated and the crescent moon exposed just enough light that he saw white caps fast approaching. "Shit! Here we go. Don't panic Kari!"

"I love you!" she reached over, touching his shoulder, feeling his muscles at full capacity trying to control the out of control machine.

He glanced over at her for just a split moment and in the faint light he could see the terrified look in her eyes, which in turn frightened him beyond belief. "I love you too. Don't panic! Get out quick and we'll be ok." He had three back up plans in his head, all of which included her escape and not one included his.

He leaned back, pulling on the stick hoping to go in tail first, knowing it was going to be violent and worse yet, the darkness would make the escape even more treacherous. His last thought before impact was of JD, Casey and Ally.


	20. Chapter 20

"Cover your face, Kari!" Steve yelled as the helicopter braised the tip of the water. The only advantage they had going for them was that it was a relatively calm night. He pulled back as hard as he could on the joystick almost afraid he would break off the instrument in his hand trying to keep the front end from tipping forward. His adrenaline was off the charts as he felt the tail hit first. He reached up in the darkness, switching the rotors off, feeling for the two switches. The motor cut out at the same time that the skids touched the water.

They both jerked forward in their seats as it plunged into the water. Steve braced himself against the instrument dash with his left hand and instinctively put an arm across Kari with his right. He had his seat belt off in seconds as the blades chopped away at the top of the surf, sending buckets of water crashing into the windshield. The helicopter shifted while the blades dove deeper into the ocean slowly rolling it. He gripped the handle above his head so he wouldn't fall into Kari. The hinges on the passenger side door began to buckle, pushing it in-ward. Within seconds she could feel water at her feet.

Her hands were still over her face afraid to look at what was happening. She lunged forward in her seat, reaching out defensively and heard a loud crack, knowing for sure that the windshield had broken and that water was going to come flooding in and drown her at any second. She felt a hand on her neck and looked over in the darkness as Steve began to undo her safety strap. The water at her feet quickly began to climb up her shin and then her knees. She felt his hands push hers out-of-the-way as she fumbled with the lower strap trying to undo it like she had been told.

'_The door away from the water! Away from the water!_' she remembered him telling her. She felt disoriented, looking around in the dark trying to determine which way to go when the helicopter began to roll again. Her door barely held back the flood that was trying to get in.

Steve reached under his seat, looking for a life vest. "Shit!" he mumbled nervously, not able to locate one. He grabbed her by the shirt and stood up, bracing one foot on the edge of her seat and the other on the windshield as it rolled completely on its side and then stopped, bobbing in the water like a cork.

"Stand up!" he yelled, "Crawl around me out my door!"

She held on to his arm that had a hold of her shirt as well as a generous amount of her hair. The adrenaline soaring through her mixed with fear left no room for pain. He lifted her as she pushed herself up. She looked past him at the door that was already open for her. The water was already at her thighs as she reached up, grabbing the edge and pulling herself up. She felt a push on her butt and within seconds she was almost all the way out.

"Jump out and swim away!" He felt the helicopter shifting again, "Hurry!"

She fell out into the water that was only half a foot from the opening and began to swim away as fast as she could. She looked back over her shoulder and watched with horror as the water began to pour into the compartment.

"Steve!" she screamed, "Steve!" She started to swim back when the whole cabin vanished under the water. The only thing left visible were the blades that were quickly following. She went under with it, frantically trying to see him but it was too dark. She came back up and screamed for him again. She took a breath and dove back under, making her way over to the crash site. She felt something move next to her in the water and resurfaced just in time to see a blade miss her face by only inches. She swam back away from it and could feel the pull of the current as the helicopter sank. She struggled to keep her head up all the while frantically searching the area for him. "Steve!"

He watched her swim away, satisfied she was safe. He reached behind the passenger seat feeling for the life raft. He felt the water rushing in as it poured over his back. He knew he was going to have to wait for the cabin to fill up before he could get out, but he also knew he couldn't get out until he had that raft. Without a life vest Kari would never make it. He could tread water for hours, but she couldn't, especially after just having the baby and he'd never be able to hold them both up. If he didn't get the raft out she would die. He wasn't leaving that cabin until it was in his hand.

He could barely move against the rage of water that poured in from both entrances now. He lifted his face up and filled his lungs to capacity and then blew out, inhaling and exhaling again and again trying to prepare his lungs to take in every bit of air that he could, knowing he was going to need it. He had begun swimming and working out again since the shooting, but as he breathed in he could feel the strain on his left lung from where he had been shot.

Once the water reached his neck he took his last fill and went under. He closed his eyes and used his memory to find the raft that was tucked behind the seat inside a tear away plastic bag. He finally got a grip on it and yanked it free, getting a hold of the strap tightly so it couldn't break away from his grip if it got caught on something. He pushed up with his hands, trying to force the door open that Kari had gone through, realizing it was the passenger door. The helicopter had shifted and his door was now facing downward as the machine plummeted to the bottom. He could feel the pressure on his body as he sank deeper and deeper.

Kari treaded water twisting her body from left to right searching for him. The vast open space showed no sign of him.

"Steve, Steve, Steve…" she whimpered, screaming it out when she could. It was taking too long, "Please, please. Where are you?" She began to feel the panic of losing him. "Steve!" she screamed, getting a mouthful of water. She coughed it out as the panic turned to a fear that wrapped its ugly arms around her and squeezed, imagining him below her at that moment, drowning.

He swam through the door and pushed himself sideways away from the wreckage just missing a blade that grazed his head. He slowly blew bubbles out his mouth trying to equalize his lungs that felt like they might explode. He kicked his legs, shooting straight up like an arrow. '_Almost there. Hang on! Hang on!"_ he told himself.

He needed a breath. He wasn't going to make it. If it didn't happen in the next ten seconds he feared he would pass out. Worse yet he couldn't see the surface so he had no idea how much further it was. His thoughts went to JD and the time he had made the swim down to the park and back and the determination he had. He fed off that, searching inside himself for that same endurance and strength.

Kari scrambled in the water. It felt like an eternity since she had swum away from him. She was frantic with worry almost on the verge of hysteria when he came out of the water only about twenty feet away from her. She could her him gasping for air. "Steve!" She swam over to him as he treaded water, coughing and struggling to catch his breath. "Steve!" She caught up with him as he fumbled with what he thought was the life raft, but to his alarming disappointment, it was only a vest. He was sure he grabbed the right one, but as he got a look at it he felt his heart sink. Nevertheless, he had one for her. Judging by the size of it, it could hold him up easily so he knew she would be safe. He reached out, pulling her over the rest of the way.

He slid her arm inside the opening; treading water, still trying to catch a good breath, "Get in it."

"Are you ok?" she looked at his face as he panted at a rapid speed.

"Get your arms in!" he demanded, coughing and tilting his head back again, feeling light-headed.

"Where's yours?" she said frantically, noticing him not wearing one.

She felt his kicks under the water slow as his face became relaxed. "Oh my God, Steve! No! No! No!" She wrapped an arm around his body as he began to pass out. "Oh god baby please don't!" she begged, but within seconds his body became dead weight, his face falling forward on to her shoulder as she held onto the vest with one arm in the sleeve and the other holding him tightly around the body so he wouldn't go under.

"I can't hold you!" she cried as her body began to shake from the fear of him slipping away under the water. She reached around with her arm that was tucked inside the vest and held on to him. She struggled trying to keep her shoulder out of the water where he rested so he wouldn't drown. She wasn't even positive if he was still breathing. She felt herself beginning to cry, but refused to lose control and take the risk of making the situation even more dire.

She growled instead, getting angry, not at him but at their situation. "What is it with us!" She yelled, "Why are you always testing us?!" She grunted, pulling up on him as his chin touched the water, "Don't you get it by now, if you take one you might as well take the other. I'm not letting go!" she yelled vehemently. "You fucking prick!" She didn't think she had ever been that angry before in her life. "Goddamnit! Mother…" she yelled out every foul word that she had ever heard, feeling her adrenaline kicking in.

She lifted up with her arm that was holding him and pushed the vest under the water with her other arm and managed to slip one of his in through the sleeve with hers. She wrapped it around his body and pushed him backward so he was on his back, laying on it. She scissor kicked her legs as hard as she could keeping her self up and then slid her arm out at the same time she bent his elbow and shoved it through the other sleeve, pushing on his hand until it was in, hoping she didn't break his wrist. He started to roll over as she pulled together the jacket, snapping it closed.

She laid him out on his back again and maneuvered behind, wrapping her arms around his chest with his head lying back on her shoulder again. The vest held them both up enough to keep his head out of the water as long as she kicked her legs. She put her trembling hand over his face feeling his warm breath. She let out sigh of relief and started to laugh at her accomplishment, not knowing how in the hell she had pulled it off.

She gripped tightly to the vest and noticed a red plastic bulb like object just below the shoulder, wondering if that was a beacon of some kind. She fumbled around with her hand but didn't know how to turn it on. She looked over her shoulder and could see the glow of Honolulu in the distance, but saw no sign of a rescue helicopter or boat. It was dark all around her and even though she had Steve close to her she had never felt so scared and helpless.

"Don't panic," she whispered to herself, hearing his voice in her head that was always encouraging, "Don't panic and everything will be ok."


	21. Chapter 21

She held on to him and could feel his steady breathing which was a relief in itself. She assumed he must have just passed out from being under the water for so long, praying it was nothing else. She knew his lungs wouldn't be at 100% yet; it was too soon. She kicked her legs focusing on keeping his head above the water.

"Steve," she whimpered, when she got no response, she gently shook him, "Steve!"

Still nothing.

She glanced over her shoulder and then the other one, scanning the darkness for any kind of light that would indicate a rescue. She wasn't sure how long she could hold him up. She felt strong right now, but what if no one came? They would both drown, because there was no way she would ever take the vest off of him while he was alive to save herself. She understood now how he felt when he had risked his life for her; it was a no win situation.

She thought about JD, Casey and Ally, all so young. Naturally the tears returned wondering if she would ever see them again. She was getting dangerously close to a state of depression that could alter her physical ability when she heard him moan.

"Steve?" She felt his hands move in the water as he slowly regained consciousness.

He heard his name over and over but the pounding in his head is what was most apparent. He felt like he was floating. He opened his eyes and it took him a second to regain his composure. It was dark and as he lifted his hands out of the water it all hit him at once. He struggled against Kari, not knowing she was holding on to him. He lifted his head, getting erect and felt something holding him back. That's when her voice replaced the pounding.

"Steve! Are you ok?"

He was startled and confused, looking down and finally seeing her hands gripping the life vest from behind. He gripped onto her wrists and turned his head, barely getting a glimpse of her.

"Kari?!" He started coughing before he could speak again and shifted his body.

"Just relax," she said calmly, feeling his concern growing.

"Let go," he said hoarsely, "so I can turn around."

She released the grip and treaded water on her own for the first time, amazed at how strong she felt, knowing if she had too she could do this for hours, especially now that he was awake. It was just a matter of staying calm.

He twisted his body around and the second he saw her his panic set in. She was exactly in the position that he had most feared.

He reached out as if she were drowning and grabbed her around the body, pulling her close to him. "It's ok. I've got you."

She got a mouth full of water and turned her head, spitting it out and coughing. "Steve, I'm fine."

He didn't hear words only her cough that he had unknowingly caused. "Hold on," The grip became tighter as he began to fumble with the straps of the life vest.

She could hear the concern in his voice as the grip around her became too tight. She saw what he was trying to do and stopped him. "Don't do that!" she scolded him, bending her body back against the relentless hold he had around her waist. He wasn't listening. She reached over with her hands and tried to stop him from removing the clasps. "Steve!"

"I've almost got it." He thought she was trying to help but wished she wouldn't.

"Steve!" she said more adamantly, when he wouldn't stop she dipped her hand in the water and splashed him in the face.

The water startled him and he looked up at her as she put both her hands on his face, "Stop it!" she said forcefully, "Just stop!"

"You need to put the vest on!" He got his other arm around, holding her as if she might slip away.

"No, I'm ok."

He shook his head, "You need the vest on! I can tread water." He started to reach for the straps again.

She moved her hands down to his chest and gripped the jacket, pushing herself away from him. "Let me go!" She got her knees up between them and pushed off.

"What are you doing?" he yelled, reaching out for her.

"Stop!" she practically screamed. "Listen to me?" she swam back away from him. "You need to keep the vest on so you can hold me. I can't hold you up."

"No!"

"Yes!" she argued, "Think about it. It's the right move."

He reached out for her in the darkness. "Come closer."

"Not until you agree with me." She used her arms to move away from him again.

"Damn it Kari! Stop moving away!"

"Then you stop that stupid chivalry and listen to me. I can't hold you. We will last a lot longer out here if you keep the vest on and hold me."

He held steady glaring at her. He hated to admit it but she was right. He motioned with his arm to her, "Fine. Come here."

She swam back over to him and when she was within reach he grabbed her by the shirt and pulled her in aggressively. "Don't do that again! You have no idea how quickly we can get separated out here," he reprimanded. "Things can happen in the blink of an eye."

She was stunned by his anger and showed it on her face. "Ok, I'm sorry," she agreed passively.

His expression softened as he wrapped an arm around her waist, feeling her legs kick against his. His other hand let go of her shirt and moved some hair away from her face. "Are you tired?"

"No, I'm really not."

He smiled slightly at her endurance, "How long was I out for?"

"Ten, maybe fifteen minutes."

He looked down at the vest trying to recall everything before he passed out. "How did you get me in this?"

"I have no idea. I bet if I tried a hundred more times I couldn't do it." She looked at the object on the vest, "What is that?"

Steve bent his chin and smiled," Nice! I didn't even see that."

She watched him reach in the vest by his armpit and suddenly a red light came on and blinked about every two seconds.

"I didn't know how to turn it on. How long will it last?"

"Usually about twelve hours or so. Hey," he put his other arm back around her waist, "stop kicking. Just relax, I've got you."

She put her hands on his shoulders careful not to cover the blinking light and stopped moving, surprised at how easy it was for him to hold her. The fear she had from earlier had vanished now that he was awake. She never was afraid when he was around, even now when she should have been. She just didn't feel it.

"Do you still have your shoes on?" he asked.

"Yes."

"Can you get them off and hand them too me?" he pushed back looking down on her, "Are you wearing your jean shorts?"

She smiled, "Yes. Why? Do you want me to take them off too?"

He glanced up at her playful expression. "What?"

"I'll take mine off if you take yours off?"

He went to remind her that they were in a very serious position, but then decided against it. He was relieved that she didn't seem frightened when on all accounts, she should have been. "Give me your shoes," he shook his head, "You horny broad."

She reached down and pulled one off putting it between them.

"Take the shoelaces out," he instructed her.

"What about the shoe?"

"Toss it. It's dead weight on your foot."

She pulled the stings out and tossed it behind her head, "I love these shoes," she whined, reaching down for the other one.

"I'll buy you five pair when we get home," he sighed, rolling his eyes.

She looked up at his face that was inches from hers, "Do you think that will be soon?"

He nodded, "They had us on radar. That should give a good indication of where to start looking."

She tossed the other shoe over her shoulder, "What do you want me to do with these?" she asked, holding the laces.

"Put one end through the belt loop of your jeans and then through one of mine and tie it in a bow. Do that with both of them."

"So we're officially joined at the hip?" she chuckled, reaching down between them, performing the task.

"Talk about being connected to the ole` ball and chain," he added with a grin.

"Careful now," she warned, "I might miss a loop and tie it to something else."

"I apologize," he replied quickly. He watched her face as she concentrated on doing the job at hand as he held her. They bobbed in the water close to 20 miles off the coast. He looked over her shoulder repeatedly, scanning the horizon for rescue lights of any kind, wondering how far they had drifted from their last radar position. He was nervous about that but refused to let her know he felt anything but confident that they would be rescued soon. He looked at his watch and new the tide would be in their favor. The glow from Honolulu on the horizon was his point of interest. It was a mistake to try and swim right now. He wanted to stay within the range of their last radar position. If the Coast Guard didn't come within the next hour, then it would be time to start moving toward the lights before they disappeared with the sunrise.

"There," she put her hands on his biceps, "now we can't get away from each other."

He carefully relaxed the hold around her, feeling the tug on his shorts. "Are you cold?"

"Not really." She had her arms tucked in front of her, gripping on to the jacket by his shoulders. She could feel the warmth from his body; it was just enough to keep her comfortable. "Are you really confident about them finding us?" she watched his reaction.

"Yes."

She knew that he wouldn't tell her even if he weren't. Sometimes she found that admirable and other times she hated it. At this moment she hated it, because she knew he was lying. They were in trouble but he would never falter, just like when he went under with the helicopter. He was searching for a life vest for her, no matter the cost to himself. "You were down for so long. I thought you drowned."

The mood changed with that statement. "We're ok now," he consoled her. She shivered and he wasn't sure if that was from being wet and cold or from the situation. It didn't matter either way to him, he moved his hands over her, covering her like a blanket, trying to give her whatever it was she needed.

"We're not ok. Why do bad things keep happening to us?"

He corrected her, "We made it out alive. I wouldn't consider that bad."  
"No, I don't mean that. Normal people don't have these kinds of things happen to them."

"This wasn't our fault. The helicopter had a malfunction."

"John flew that helicopter for eight years, hundreds of times. We've flown it twice and it crashes on us. Why?"

He shrugged, "I don't know. Luck of the draw."

"What about JD?" she pointed out, "Wrong place at the wrong time? Luck of the draw? You getting shot. It seems to me that whenever we cross each other, bad things happen."

He shook his head, "I'm not following you Kari. How does JD getting kidnapped fall under you and I crossing each other? Everything was going perfect with us when that happened. Life was good."

"And then look at what I did," she looked down, "I went against us. We turned against each other and ever since then things haven't been going well."

He stared at her, hearing something new in her voice that frightened him. "What do you mean?"

She looked up at him. She wasn't sure this was the right time to say it, but here they were, there was nothing to do but wait and after his announcement back at the hotel, she didn't want to go back home with a whole new set of problems. Why not now she decided. There's no time like the present. "I'm not happy, Steve. Not like I used to be."

That was like a shot right through his heart that stunned him. It was the line couples would use just before dropping the divorce bomb, or _'I think it would be better if we separated for a while'_. His whole body stiffened as he quickly sized up their relationship over the past couple of months, trying to figure out where it had all gone wrong. He couldn't think straight with that one thought floating around him. He stared at her trying to read her as the blinking red light showed the sadness, wondering what was going to be the next line she dropped. Was she hinting around that she wanted a separation right here in the middle of the ocean after what they had just gone through? "What do you? Were you…" he fumbled with his words, "Were you faking everything earlier today at the hotel, because I felt like we were really in sync for the first time in a long time?"

She could see the concern and hurt on his face but heard it mostly in his voice. "I could never fake that with you," she reassured him. "I love you. It seems to be the only time I really feel that we are on the same path is when we're making love. I have been faking though," she finally confessed, feeling it finally slide off her shoulders, "I've been faking how I feel about everything that's been going on in our lives."

He still didn't feel relieved. She said she loved him but she wasn't happy. He couldn't get past that. "I don't make you happy anymore?" he asked, sure that the San Diego stunt didn't help matters.

"You make me happy, but the direction our lives are going, doesn't."

He thought of their earlier fight, it was the reason they were in this predicament. She'd be safe back at the hotel if he hadn't made another mistake, "I shouldn't have said yes to the job in San Diego. I know that was a mistake. Even when I was doing it I knew it was wrong."

"Then why?" she questioned him, "Why would you do that?"

He shrugged, looking out into the vast darkness, shaking his head.

She gently shook him, "Don't shrug your shoulders like you don't have an answer to what I just asked."

"Are we going to do this right here, right now?" he asked, reminding her of their situation.

"Why not?" she practically yelled, "I finally have you trapped, there's nowhere to run to Steve. No phone call to take, no kid to distract you. Nothing! I think this is the perfect time."

"We need to figure out how we are going to get out of here!"

She pointed toward the lights of Oahu, "You said it yourself that they should find us soon, so you don't have to play Navy Seal either. Stop trying to avoid the subject." She refused to waiver, "I'm not happy Steve and I'm not moving to San Diego with you either."

There it was again that hint of separation. He could tell she was fired up and he also knew from experience that when she got this way, there was no holding back. They hadn't had one of these conversations in a couple of years. It was like their own kind of marriage counseling, only they relied on each other to solve the outcome rather than an outsider. They were due, he knew that without a doubt, but he wondered if maybe things had gone too far.

"You wouldn't ever leave me," he felt a shiver run down his spine, "would you Kari?" He held his breath, waiting for her reply.

"Leave you?" she wasn't sure what he was asking, because the idea of ever physically leaving him never crossed her mind. She just needed answers. "No, Steve. This isn't about running away from our problem. I want to get to the bottom of it." She glanced around, "Maybe I should be more concerned with our situation. She looked right at him, "But honestly, I'm more afraid of going home and continuing the life we are living than being stranded out here." She shrugged, "I know that sounds crazy, but it's true."

She had him backed up into a corner and there was nowhere to go. He didn't even know where to begin with what she was asking. He hadn't even come to terms with it himself. He decided to just come clean and lay it out there. If there was one person in this world that he could confess things too, it was Kari.

"I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I feel like I'm stuck in the middle of my life and I don't know which way I'm supposed to go. I want to do what's best for you and the kids but even as I do that, I feel like I'm making the wrong choices. Like taking you away from Hawaii." He shook his head, "I don't want to go to San Diego either."

She was relieved to hear that, but still didn't understand the reasoning behind everything. "Why did you think you had to move us away from our home? Was it really the job that was pulling you, or was it something else?" She knew she was unhappy, and considered maybe he felt the same way. "Do you feel trapped in your life? Do you miss your old life?"

"Kari," he felt sick that she would think that. Had he really gone so far that he would leave her to believe that. Worse yet, did it fall over to his kids too, did they feel it as well. "You and JD, Casey and Ally…" he didn't even know how to express it. They were his last thoughts as the helicopter went down. They were the reason he made it out. "My life before you seems empty compared to now." His tone of voice mirrored the feelings for his family that he was trying to get across to her. "I don't miss that life and I don't feel trapped by you guys, I feel like I've been rewarded."

God, she was pulling out all the stops. He knew this conversation was going to get deep and there was no way to get out of it. He was literally tied to her in the middle of the ocean and there was no escape from it. He'd been hiding behind her and the kids as an excuse to avoid what was obvious to him but as he stared at her he knew he couldn't hide it from her anymore. She knew him too well. She also knew just how to ease it out of him by not being afraid to ask the questions that he avoided. He hated that sometimes.

"Why did you leave your job at Five-0? I know how much you loved it. Working with Danny, Chin and Kono, it was where you belonged."

He was silent. He wished he could swim back to Oahu; that would have been easier to do rather than answering her question. At least she would still respect him.

She waited patiently, watching him squirm without him even moving a muscle. She knew she hit it right on the head. "Steve?"

"What?!" he said getting angry, "What do you want me to say?"

"I want to know why."

"You know why."  
"I know what you told me."

"Bullshit!" he felt himself beginning to panic over the thought of it, "You know why, so why are you trying to make me say it?"

She felt the grip around her waist tighten.

"Does it make you feel good Kari, to see me like this?"

"Like what?" she yelled, "Will you stop acting like everything is on your shoulders. I'm sick of it! You act like you're not allowed to feel anything!" Her voice got louder as she went on. "I'm surprised those bullets didn't bounce off your chest, Superman!"

His arms came up from around her waist and gripped her by the arms, "Don't bring that up!"

"Bring what up?" she badgered him, "The shooting?" she got right in his face, "You mean when you got shot. The shooting!" she yelled. "Oh no, we shouldn't talk about that should we?"

"Knock it off!" he growled, looking toward the lights of Honolulu. They seemed to be drifting toward land and he scanned the horizon for boat lights or a Coast Guard helicopter, wondering what the hell was taking them so long. He glanced back at her as she stared at him. The non-existing personal space between them was becoming a nuisance "Sometimes you go too far."

"Sometimes I have to," she replied calmly, "because you drift too far away. It's the only way I know how to reel you in." She asked again, "Why did you quit?"

"Because I," he stopped himself, afraid to answer truthfully. He loved her, there was no doubt about that, but sometimes he hated the way she pushed him.

"Because you were scared." She finished the sentence for him.

He shot her a threatening look, "Why are you doing this?"

"Because sometimes you need to be reminded that we won't see you any differently if you stumble." She touched him on the face, "Those kids love you so much. They will never see you as anything but their hero, no matter what. You're a wonderful father, Steve."

He wasn't worried at the moment about his kids seeing him differently, "What about you?" he swallowed, "If I'm not your hero, what am I?"

"You're my husband," she said sternly, refreshing his memory. "God Steve," she wanted to shake him, "I respect you more when you lean on me than when you hide yourself away from me, that's heartbreaking. "

"I don't want you to see me that way. You fell in love with me because I was your hero, and now…" he paused, it was just too hard to face her and have her see him as anything but the man he always tried to be for her. He was her protector; her provider, she was supposed to lean on him it wasn't supposed to be the other way around. If he ever saw just a hint of disappointment or worse yet, failure in her eyes, it would crush him. He wished he could walk away because he didn't like the way the conversation was beginning to turn.

"And now?" she put her hand at the nape of his heck, forcing him to look at her and finish his thought. "It's just you and me Steve." She reassured him, feeling his breathing getting rapid from the anxiety that this was causing him.

"And now…" he paused again, looking up into her eyes. He had to remind himself that he could trust her. "I'm scared Kari. I was scared to go back to work. I'm afraid of doing something that will jeopardize what I have." He searched her eyes in the darkness, looking for it, but the way she looked at him didn't change like he had anticipated. "Before the shooting it was ok. But after," the blinking red light shining on her face showed nothing except a deep concentration for what he was saying. "I want to see my kids grow up. I want to be their father. I don't want it to go to someone else. I never really had that with my Dad. I'm scared for them." He held her tighter, "You and me, I get confused sometimes about what my role is. I do lean on you though, more than you know."

His statement peeled away another layer that he would keep hidden. Her heart felt like it might burst. He was amazing, she thought. How did she ever get so lucky? She gripped onto the life vest and kissed him. "You are such a good man. I don't think I tell you that enough, but you are." She kissed him again.

His expression was dumfounded. He had been worried that she would see him as less than that, afraid that his confession would make him seem weak, but here she was giving him one of the nicest compliments that he'd ever received. "I swear to god Kari, if I live to be a hundred, I'll never be able to figure you out."

She smiled, "Just for the record, I know that you are really concerned about our dilemma right now, more than you let on, but I'm not, because I'm with you and I will never see you as anything but my hero, Steve. I literally have nothing to fear when I'm with you."

He held her closer, locking away this night in his memory, but not for the obvious reasons because of their predicament, but because once again she managed to leave him speechless.


	22. Chapter 22

Danny sat at Molly's kitchen table with JD and laughed. "You're cheating, JD!"

"No I'm not!" He laughed at his triumph once again. "Give me your five's Danny."

He pulled the card out and slammed it on the table as JD reached for it.

"Give me your two's?" JD asked in question, searching his face for the answer.

Danny glared at him, "You little manipulating piece of work. You didn't tell me you were the Go Fish champion of the world before we started!" he pretended to be angry and slammed down the card again.

JD practically fell out of his chair laughing. "You're not very good at this game."

"Whatever!" he moaned, "Go again, take another one from me." He looked down feeling Casey pulling on his pants leg. He set his fanned out cards on the table and reached over picking her up and setting her on his lap as JD ordered six's from him. He scooped his cards back up with one hand, giving him a death stare at the same time. Casey stuck her thumb in her mouth and laid her head against his body, watching them play. "Ha!" he said sadistically, "I don't have any seven's"

"I said six's!" JD corrected him.

"No, you said sevens!"

JD turned, "Gracie, what did I say?"

She walked over to them holding Ally. "I heard six's," she smiled.

"Hey," Danny whined, "Whose side are you on?"

"JD's," she replied, without a hint of regret. She handed him his phone, "Here, your phone is buzzing."

He snarled at her, "You're both cheating." He set the cards back down and took the phone from her.

She and JD chuckled to each other.

"Hello," he answered.

"I used to beat him all the time at this game too," she laughed. "He's really terrible, but don't ever play Slap Jack with him," she warmed, "he's fast."

Her attention went back to her father. Her smile faded as she watched his face turn grim, almost white. She felt a chill run through her, knowing without a doubt something bad had happened.

"What Danno?" she asked, swallowing.

He held his hand up for her to be quiet. "When?" he spoke into the phone, "Where?" He pushed back in his chair and went to stand up, setting Casey down on the floor first. He proceeded into the other room. Casey went to follow him when Gracie reached down and grabbed her by the shirt, "Casey do you want a cookie?"

She forgot all about Danny and followed her into the kitchen. She pulled one out of the cookie jar and handed it to her as she plopped down on the floor taking a bite. Gracie made her way back over to the family room when Danny came around the corner.

"Where's Maggie?"

JD looked up from his cards, "She went over to our house to get Ally diapers."

"What's wrong?" Gracie asked.

"Stay here with the kids." He walked past her toward the back door, ignoring her question.

"Dad!" she said adamantly.

He turned and watched her approach still holding Ally. She didn't look like the little girl he knew, it was moments like this that he had to remind himself she was growing up.

"What's going on Dad?" she asked again.

He looked beyond her to JD and then back at her concerned expression. She might have been more mature than he would have liked, but he still didn't ever want to see her any pain, and he knew this would hurt her, but he also knew he was obligated to tell her because of her maturity. "Come here," he motioned outside.

They stood out by Maggie's backdoor and he took deep a breath, wiping his hand over his mouth, trying to ease himself into it, "That was the Coast Guard. Steve and Kari's helicopter went down off the coast of Oahu about half an hour ago." Saying it out loud crushed him too, but he held back for her.

Gracie gasped, putting her hand over her mouth, "No! No!" tears instantly flooded her eyes, "Oh no!"

"Hey!" Danny said sternly but compassionately, "This doesn't mean we should think the worse." He put a hand on her bent head as she cuddled the sleeping baby, "You know your Uncle Steve, he's not going to go down without a fight, and he usually wins."

She looked up at him with tears streaming down her face and nodded.

"They had them on radar and were talking to Steve before they went down. That's good news." He tried to make it sound less dramatic but knew it was a fifty-fifty chance that they both made it. He refused to let himself go there until he knew for sure. "I'm going to go over and talk to Maggie and then I'm going over to the Coast Guard station. Don't say anything to JD."

She shook her head, "Of course not."

He kissed her forehead and wiped the tears from her face, "I love you sweetie."

"Love you too Danno," she whimpered. "Call me when you know something, ok? I want to know."

"I will." He kissed her once more before running the through the bushes that separated Steve and Maggie's yard.

* * *

Kari shivered as she tried to move closer to him.

"Are you getting cold?" he asked, rubbing his hands over her back.

"Yes."

"You need to move around for a while." He reached down between them and undid the shoelaces. He held on to her with both hands as she moved away, "Don't let go of my hands."

"I won't." She kicked her legs under the water getting a rhythm going. She smiled at him, gently squeezing his fingers. "It's like we're dancing."

"I think this might be the closest you will ever get me to a dance floor."

"You like slow dancing with me," she reminded him.

He huffed, "Well ya! Any chance to get close to that body is ok by me."

She smiled shyly, "You're a good dancer."

"Slow dancing maybe, but nothing else," he affirmed. "Not going to happen."

"Please, just once," she begged, "I bet you have some great moves."

He laughed, "No, that's Danny. You can dance with him."

"I don't want to dance with him. I want to dance with my husband." She tilted her head back, dipping it in the water to get her hair out of her face. She had already forgotten about being cold. The movement was helping a great deal. She smiled over at him, "Just one time?"

"Ok," he agreed, just one time. He let go with one hand and raised his other still holding her and twirled her body around in the water. She let out a surprised gasp and laughed. He did it again the other direction and when her back was too him he brought his arm still holding her hand down in front of her until it was around her waist and pulled her close against him. "There," he whispered in her ear, "we danced,"

She stopped kicking her legs and let him hold her, reaching back cupping his neck, "See, I told you, you've got some moves." She leaned back and kissed him, tasting the salt water on his lips.

* * *

Danny pulled up to the Coast Guard station at the same time as Chin and Kono. They got out of their cars and didn't say anything right away but all three had the same combination of worry and dread written all over them.

"Have you heard anything new?" Chin asked, jogging just behind him down the boat ramp to an awaiting Coast Guard cruiser.

"No." He looked up seeing the Captain, motioning to them.

"Let's go!' he yelled down to them, "You're lucky you got here. I was just about to cast off without you."

They all three sprinted to the boat as the crew threw the ropes off the side.

Someone tossed them each a life vest and they grabbed the edge of the boat simultaneously as it took off into the darkness.

Danny made his way up front and spoke to the Captain through the open door to the control room. "Did the helicopters spot anything yet?"

"No, they're hovering over the last known coördinates that they were at before we lost them on radar."

"How far would they have drifted from that spot in this amount of time?"

He looked at him, "Not far. If we don't see them within a mile radius then chances are we won't find them."

Danny narrowed his eyes, "But in the morning when it's light out it will be easier to spot them. We can determine the tide and water movement to get a broader location."

"Yes we could, but you are misunderstanding me. If we don't spot them tonight," he looked hopelessly at him, "chances are they went down with the wreck. I'm sorry Danny. You know I'll keep this search up for Steve and his wife until they pull me off this boat, but you need to realize they crashed in a helicopter at night, in the middle of the ocean. Not too many people survive that."

Kono leaned over Danny's shoulder. "Hello! Have you never met Steve McGarrett?" she said sarcastically, "I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt."

The Captain admired her stubbornness, "You're right Kono. I apologize." He snorted, "He's probably under the water fixing the thing."

"That's right!" she added, "So let's not talk about what IF we find them, and talk more about WHEN we find them." She walked toward the front of the boat without waiting for a reply.

The Captain motioned to her through the windshield. "You can tell she's a McGarrett protégé`."

* * *

Kari rested her head against Steve's. "I wish I would have eaten that hamburger now."

He kept up the motion of gliding his hands over her body, not confident that it kept her warm but it was keeping her calm. His eyes locked on the horizon. It had been three hours since the accident and he couldn't believe that he hadn't seen any kind of rescue helicopter or boat. He began to fear that they had drifted too far off from the actual crash site. The lights from Honolulu seemed to be getting closer. They were moving in with the tide, but in a couple more hours it would take them out again, and if they were caught in another current like this one, it would take them dangerously far away. He tried to keep his thoughts clear of the idea that maybe the Coast Guard would assume they died in the crash.

Kari leaned back and stretched her arms over her head. She was tied to him again but was beginning to feel sick from the motion of the water. "I take that back. I'm glad I didn't eat that hamburger," she moaned.

"Do you feel sick?"

"A little," she whimpered.

"Close your eyes."

She closed them and leaned her head back against his. "What if no one comes for us?"

"They will."

She leaned back again, focusing on him, "It's been a long time. What are you thinking?"

He knew she wanted his honest opinion about their position but wasn't sure if he should give it to her. He was still confident they were out there looking but wasn't so confident that they would find them tonight. "It's a big place were in and it's dark, but they know the water movement and will eventually calculate our position."

"What if they think we died in the crash? How long will they look for us?"

He sighed, "I'm not going to dwell on that because one, we didn't die in the crash, two, it doesn't make any sense to start fearing the worse because that just brings on a whole new set of problems, and three, I know Danny, and he won't quit until he's covered every square inch from here to Japan," he smiled trying to ease her.

"You think Danny knows?"

"Of course. My name was on the flight plan. The first thing they do is contact the Coast Guard and I know just about every one in Command over there. They would have contacted him and Chin and Kono."

She smiled feeling more at ease. "You're right. I feel better knowing they're out they're looking too."

"See, we have all our bases covered."

She closed her eyes again, leaning her head back down on his. His eyes scanned the area again as his smile faded.

* * *

Danny and Kono stood at the bow of the Coast Guard cruiser, each with a pair of binoculars scanning the water in front of the boat. The spot light shinned down, lighting up a majority of the darkness in front of them for a good one hundred yards. In the distance he could see the rescue helicopter doing the same thing over another area.

Chin came up behind him, putting a hand on his shoulder, yelling over the sound of the engines and wind, "We're almost directly over the sight of their last radar position."

"They aren't going to be anywhere near the crash site after this long," Kono jumped in.

"They know that." Chin replied, "We are heading over in the opposite direction of where the helicopter is looking. They use this as their base and fan out in a two-mile radius."

"I thought earlier he said one mile," Danny asked?

"He changed his mind." He looked over at Kono, "Kono changed his mind."

She put the binoculars back up and continued her search, "They're out there. I just know it."

* * *

"Hey! Hey!" Steve said enthusiastically, "Look!" he pointed toward an area as Kari turned her head.

"Oh my god, finally!" she shared his excitement, seeing the lights from the helicopter. She moved her body so the blinking light on the shoulder of the life vest would be that much more apparent.

"Come on," he encouraged his rescuers, "Over this way."

Kari clung to him with her eyes focused on the light that shined down on the water about four hundred yards from where they were. "Come this way," she murmured. "Please, come this way." She felt her heart sinking as the light moved in the opposite direction, away from them. "No! Over here!" she screamed waving her arm.

"Kari!" Steve said feeling her panic beginning to get the best of her, "it's ok."

"We should swim over there!" She leaned back, dipping her hands in the water like oars, trying to move them.

"No! Stop!" he ordered, "It won't do any good. We should stay put. Let them find us."

She pointed toward the helicopter as the lights faded. "They didn't see us! They won't come back here!" her voice shuttered mirroring the panic in her eyes.

He grabbed on to her shoulders gently shaking her before she became hysterical. "Hey! Listen too me! You need to calm down. We can't…"

She pushed away from him, "Come on! What are you waiting for? Let's swim over there." She reached down to undo the shoelaces when she felt his hands on her face.

He moved from her shoulders, cupping her face firmly with his hands, forcing her to look at him, "Kari, stop moving!" he said in a commanding voice that she had only heard a couple of times before. She looked up at him as his grip on her softened just slightly, "We have to stay put because they are tracking the movement of the water. If we swim around voluntarily they will miss us for sure."

She bit her bottom lip as it began to quiver, trying to focus on him through the tears that formed. "I'm getting scared."

His hands went from a forceful hold to light embrace, running his thumb over her cheek as a tear fell, "I know. It's ok."

She began to settle down holding on to him in the same way. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

"Hey," he spoke enduringly adding a smile, "It's ok sweetie." He kissed her, moving his hands back around her body, hugging her.

She felt the need to speak her mind, "I want to have another baby."

He leaned back shaking his head completely caught off guard by that statement, "What?" he halfheartedly laughed.

"Not right away," she sniffed, "but in the future. I'd like to have four kids."

He couldn't help but smile, "Ok," he agreed apprehensively, still stunned by her off the wall confession, but glad she was thinking of the future in a positive way. "Fours good."

She sighed as if relieved to get that off her chest, "Ok, then we'll have one more." She moved her hands to his shoulders, "And you'll talk to Danny about going back to Five-0 too, right? Because that's what you want?" she asked, recalling their earlier conversation. "I know you're scared, but you shouldn't be afraid to live your life the way you want Steve. You should be more afraid of not living it. And just like you know we'll be alright now, I know you will be ok going back to that line of work." She nodded confidently as if she had just received a premonition on the fact, "I just know it."

He thought it odd, but hearing her say it in that way took away the fear he had been harboring, he believed her. He believed every word she said. "Ok, I'll talk to Danny."

* * *

Danny looked down at the picture on his phone as the boat skidded across the water headed to another search location. His thoughts went to JD, Casey and Ally. He felt a lump in his throat form, swallowing it down. Casey and Ally could deal with it because they were so young, but JD he thought sadly, it would change him for the rest of his life. He felt a hand on his shoulder and looked over seeing Kono.

"I have the same picture." She held her phone up, showing Steve coming out of the hospital nursery holding Ally as he introduced her to them. His smile was as big and proud as could be.

"That was a good day," Danny smiled.

Kono looked out over the water, feeling a sense of hopelessness for the first time. Chin came up behind her and held his phone up, displaying the same picture. They all chuckled at the parody of it.

The picture on Danny's phone was replaced by one of Gracie when she was three years old as her call came in, "He turned toward the water answering it. "Hey Monkey." He tried to sound upbeat and positive, but she knew her Father too well.

"Nothing yet?" she asked, sitting next to Maggie at the counter as the kids slept soundly.

"No, we're headed to a new location right now."

"Don't give up Dad," she said sternly, "Maggie and I have been sitting here talking and you know Uncle Steve would never let anything happen to Kari, ever! And he would never leave her alone with the kids,' you know that. So don't let them back off the search. If you have too, you get all Jersey on em', OK!"

He leaned his elbow on the edge of the boat wiping his hand through his hair, "Ok Monkey." He stood up looking out over the water when he saw it. He instantly leaned forward narrowing his eyes talking to Chin and Kono with Gracie still on the phone, "Hey, did you see that?"

They both turned, looking out in the direction he was staring at.

"See what?" Chin asked.

"I saw something, like a red flash. It was small but I swear I saw something."

Chin picked up the binoculars just about to put them to his face when Danny and Kono both yelled out.

"There!" he pointed, right over there!"

"I saw it!" Kono exclaimed, "A red light."

Danny turned and ran for the control room. He flew up the six-step ladder to the door, "We saw something!" He turned in the direction of the light, pointing out to the water, "Right over there. A red flash, Kono saw it too!"

* * *

Kari rubbed her hands over Steve's biceps, feeling the goose bumps, "You need to move around for a while, you're getting really cold."

He nodded, reaching down and untying them, "You're getting tired too. Put on the jacket for a while and I'll tread water."

"How much longer before daylight?"

He looked at his watch. "It's only 2:30, not for a while?"

He slipped the jacket off his shoulders and kicked his legs, helping her into it. "Lay back," he instructed her.

She retained the exact position that she had him in when he had passed out, laying her heard against his shoulder as he gripped the jacket from behind and kicked his legs in a way that would not jostle her, so she might be able to fall asleep.

"Is that comfortable?" he asked.

"Yes," she smiled, "Will you sing to me now?"

He laughed, "I can recite Green Eggs and Ham."

She laughed with him, looking down over the top of the water. She suddenly pulled her head up and was erect in the water. "Steve look! A boat!"

He let go of the jacket and moved next to her, "I see it!"

She undid the straps of the jacket. "Hold it up so they can see the light!"

"Are you sure you're not too tired to tread?"

"No!" She was out of the jacket before he had finished his question.

They each took ahold of it and lifted it up kicking their legs trying to get it as high as possible. The gentle rolling of the waves would lift them up and then drop them back down, making the boat visible and then it would disappear until the next one.

"Please, please," Kari begged, "please see us."

"Come on!" Steve encouraged, afraid this might be their last chance. The boat was speeding across the water and didn't have the searchlight on, so he knew they didn't even suspect them of being in the area. "Open your eyes!" he said angrily.

They both watched with excitement as the boat's searchlight suddenly came on and turned in their direction. The light was about three hundred yards away but it was bright and pointing right at them.

"Oh my God, Steve!" Kari screamed out. "I think they see us!"

"Come on! Come On! Keep coming!" he held steady, keeping the jacket in the same position to give them a target, feeling confident about Kari's statement.

Within seconds they could hear the boats engines. The light was in their eyes now, so bright that it blocked out everything else.

He looked over at her, feeling the same joy that was showing all over her face, knowing they were home free.

"You did really well out here Kari. I'm so proud of you honey."

"You got me through it. I never would have made it without you."

"We're a good team."

"The best!" she said confidently.

As the boat neared they could hear Danny's voice yell out, "Hey! You guys need a lift?"

* * *

Kari was taken on board first and greeted by Kono with open arms and a tight hug. They clung to each other; Kono became soaked from a dripping wet Kari, but didn't care. She was too happy to have her friend back safe and alive.

Danny and Chin reached down taking Steve under the arms, helping the cable lifting him by hoisting him up and over the edge. A crew member undid the attachment and he hugged them both at the same time. "I've never been so glad to see you guys." He released them, looking at each one, speaking from the heart, "I knew you'd find us."

"You've got two kids in diapers!" Danny laughed, "You're goddamn right we were going to find you! We didn't want diaper duty."

They all three cracked up.

"You already left me with a crap load of paperwork at the station, no more shit, please!" He slapped him on the back, "I don't know how you used to manage all that. I hate it!"

Steve put his arm around him, "Well actually, I wanted to talk to you about that."

Danny stopped, "What?" he said with wide eyes, glancing over at Chin, "Are you thinking about coming back?" he clasped his hands together, "I'm begging you."

Steve squeezed the back of his neck, "We'll talk tomorrow, Partner."

"Don't tease me like I'm a high school girl with a crush."

Kono moved from Kari to Steve, fighting back the emotions that were engulfing her.

He embraced her tightly, "Thank you Kono."

"Thank you for keeping my friend safe. I knew you guys were ok. I just knew it."

"And I knew my team would find us."

* * *

Steve walked in their bedroom carrying JD and Casey in each arm. They both had their heads on his shoulder, sound asleep. Danny had taken them straight to Maggie's house after getting off the boat. She had a feast ready for them and after eating and showering, they brought the kids home even though it was almost four in the morning, wanting to be close to them. Maggie insisted on bring over breakfast in the morning and babysitting, so they could have time to rest.

Steve squatted down over their bed, with his arms around their backs and gently laid them down, moving them over to the middle. Kari lay down on the other side with Ally as he did the same next to JD.

They each put their hands on them, touching their little fingers and stroking their hair, admiring their little family.

"You want another one huh?" he whispered, smiling over at her. "Do you still feel that, or was it just because of our situation?"

"I meant it," she whispered back, "Do you still want another one?" she asked, wondering the same thing.

"Kari, Kari, Kari," he whispered, shaking his head at her. "Don't you get it by now? I'm crazy, madly in love with you and would give you anything you wanted."

She felt it too. Something had changed between them. She had always been in love with him, but it was as if she were seeing him for the first time all over again. She felt butterflies dancing in her stomach. She reached over the kids, taking his hand and squeezing it, "When I see you with the kids, the way they look at you. How excited they get when you come home, their little faces just light up," she caught her breath. "As a mother and a wife, that alone is all you ever have to give me. I love you so much for that. Everything else is just icing on the cake."

He closed his eyes and kissed the back of her hand, "How lucky are we?"

"Very," she smiled.

"No more distance between us," he promised.

"No more secrets only trust," she added, "And with all that, nothing bad will ever happen to us again," she giggled.

He chuckled with her, sitting up on his elbow, leaning over the kids as she did the same. "How does the old saying go?" he whispered with a teasing grin.

"I don't know, what?" she shrugged, amused, waiting for his reply.

He looked right in her eyes, "They lived happily ever after_._"

She liked that, and sealed it with a kiss.

_**THE END**_


	23. Chapter 23 A New Story

Hi Everyone,

Thank you so much for all the nice comments and reviews! I've had quite a few messages and requests to continue on with Kari and Steve but I really think I have gone as far as I can with them. However; I am writing a new story right now that I hope you will enjoy. I'll probably be posting the first chapter in a couple of weeks.

I don't have a title yet but a synopsis of the storyline is mainly about Steve. He receives an invitation to a reunion in Northern California along with some close high school friends from his teenage years in LA. His apprehension about attending is laid out in the first couple of paragraphs from the first chapter...

* * *

Chapter One

Steve sat at his office desk staring at the picture on his computer. Of the five people in the photo along side of him, his eyes were on one individual in particular. Her beautiful smile radiated off the page. Her jet-black hair was in a high ponytail over her head. The emerald green eyes shined and danced as she had one arm around him and the other around her identical twin sister. The picture was sixteen years old and of all the people in the photo she was the only one that hadn't aged past that day.

There were six of them and they shared everything together from classes to lunches to weekends. They were inseparable; friends for life; until that one fateful day when Karen had been taken away from them in the blink of an eye. He hadn't been strong enough to pull her from the raging water that sucked her down under the rocks in the river. He would have died with her if Jack and Craig hadn't jumped in and pulled him back from going down after her. He could still hear his girlfriend Carly who was her twin, screaming hysterically as she watched her sister disappear.

They were just two months shy of graduation and the group hadn't been together since her funeral sixteen years earlier.

* * *

If you like it so far, stay tuned! I'll be posting under the new title once I come up with one...Thanks, Melissa


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